Birth Mother Blog

You can Still Choose a Closed Adoption as a Pregnant Woman in Missouri 

As with any adoption, it can vary from birth mother to birth mother. The conditions or terms decided by the birth mother are always best suited in what she feels most comfortable with and believes will work for her and her baby. This includes what type of adoption she wants, who she wants to raise her child and how involved she wants to be after the adoption has been finalized. Each and every birth mother’s adoption journey will be as unique as she is. No two adoption processes will ever be the same

That said, Adoption Choices of Missouri is here to share more information about the three types of adoption you can choose — specifically the option of closed adoption. Even though most adoptions are open in some way, you can still choose a closed adoption as a pregnant woman in Missouri if you feel it’s the best decision for you and your child. 

Closed Adoption – What Is It?

Early in the adoption process, birth mothers are asked how exactly they would like the exchange of information to be held when her baby is placed with his or her chosen adoptive family. If the expectant mother would prefer that her adoption journey have privacy, or she does not want to be involved in the adoption process, she could choose a closed adoption. In a closed adoption agreement, no identifying information is shared with the adoptive parents. No medical informational, contact information, etc. Everything is kept confidential. 

Then, once the adoption is finalized in court, all files related to the adoption process are sealed. Access to these can only be granted once the child turns an approved age. This can vary depending on what state you live in. For Missouri, the child must be at least 18 years of age. 

Common Emotions Associated with a Closed Adoption

One of the most common things birth mothers may feel when she puts her baby into the care of an adoptive family is regret. Guilt and many other emotions, like sadness, may come over you as well, but this is all part of the natural grieving process.  It’s not uncommon to feel these emotions throughout your adoption journey as making the choice to place your child for adoption is not an easy one.

Know that you are not cruel, selfish or weak to experience these feelings. Only you know what is best for you. Admitting that you are not able to provide for your child and putting your baby’s needs above your own is a decision that takes an immense amount of courage, strength and love. Adoption ensures that your baby, once placed in the care of an adoptive family, will have the best life he or she can have. This doesn’t mean, however, that it won’t be a bittersweet moment for you. So, if you find yourself struggling, don’t bottle it inside. Seek help from an adoption counselor or talk to a mental health professional. They can relieve your mind and help you find comfort in knowing that you made the right decision for both you and your baby. That you  gave your baby a better chance at success and the opportunity to live a happy, healthy life.

You can Still Choose a Closed Adoption as a Pregnant Woman in Missouri

The bottom line is that having a closed adoption does not make you a bad person or a bad mother. Any speculation or stigma about it is wrong and it is completely fine to go through with. Choosing a closed adoption is nothing to be ashamed of. It still ensures that your child will be placed in a loving home and be raised in a happy, safe and healthy environment. 

In addition, choosing a closed adoption as a pregnant woman in Missouri means that you get to maintain your privacy and have a sense of closure. Closed adoptions let you move on and put one of the hardest decisions you’ve ever had to make behind you. Despite the change the adoption industry has made over the past several years, closed adoptions are still available and an okay type of adoption to choose if you determine it’s the best decision for you and your baby.

For all things adoption, contact Adoption Choices of Missouri here and let’s get started on your own adoption plan.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the AuthorMy name is Alexander Charles Cooper, I come from a family of four that originates from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. I, along with my younger brother Greyson were born in North Carolina, three years after my parents had wed and moved to the state. Alexander shares his birthday with Maya Angelou, which he takes great pride in. 

Growing up, Alexander had the privilege of having both parents in his life and a stable upbringing in which he was surrounded by family and friends. He believes that much of his family foundation is built on faith which has given him a discipline and practice that has allowed him to discover and build his spiritual self. He is also interested in politics and worldly news that allows him to excel in American literature, philosophy/ethics, and higher learning. 

From that, his passion in writing bloomed and he found his true calling: “I wished to create and write for a living and know it will be what makes me happiest. My only wish is for me to bring about positive change for others both near and far and leave a lasting legacy that contributes to the overall wellbeing and joy of others.”