Birth Mother Blog

Why are people afraid of adoption?

By Blessing E. Ikhimokpa

People who’ve never considered adoption are the reasons misconceptions about adoption exist. Those people have made adoption seem like a “way out.” That is because the birth mother has decided to place the birth child up for adoption. They’re giving a child up for adoption, so they don’t have to take on the parental responsibilities. 

At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we’ll help clear up those misconceptions about adoption. Adoption doesn’t have to be something to be afraid of. If you feel unsure about adoption and want to know more. You can contact us at Adoption in Missouri, and one of our adoption agents will be sure to help you. 

Reasons people are afraid of adoption?

People are afraid of adoption because they don’t understand it. If you’ve never been in a situation where adoption was an option. You wouldn’t know anything about the topic. Other than looking for information online, adoption isn’t a talked-about topic. 

When people go through an unplanned pregnancy, their first thought isn’t adoption. Adoption comes into the conversation once people start stating their options. Some reasons people are afraid of adoption are:

  • They think is the birth mother giving up the birth child
  • They don’t want the birth child to come to dislike them
  • They don’t want to feel guilty for placing their child up for adoption
  • Unless they choose an open adoption, they won’t get updates on the birth child

Why do birth mothers choose adoption?

Adoption is a life-changing decision that is made with reason. There are many reasons why people go through adoption. None of them should be a reason for concern. Some of those reasons are:

  • The birth mother is going through an unplanned pregnancy
  • The birth mother can’t afford to raise a child
  • The birth mother isn’t ready to take on parental responsibilities or doesn’t want to
  • The birth mother doesn’t want kids 

If you’re going through an unplanned pregnancy and are considering adoption. You’re going to need to go through with the adoption process. If you want to go through the adoption process, this shouldn’t be something to be afraid of. There are steps in place to help you. 

Some misconceptions about adoption?

Misconceptions are opinions based on not understanding something. For example, adoption. Not many people understand it because they don’t see themselves doing it. So they make up misconceptions. Some of them are;

  • The birth mother is giving up the birth child
  • Adoption is expensive
  • Once the birth child has been adopted, the birth mother can change their mind
  • The adoptive parent (s) shouldn’t tell the adopted child that they’ve been adopted

Will I be able to see my child after they’ve been adopted?

Depending on what type of adoption you choose from. You’ll be able to regularly visit the birth child. If seeing the birth child and forming a bond is something you’d like. Then open adoption is the right choice for you. In an open adoption, with the adoptive parent (s) permission. The birth mother will be able to communicate with the birth child. 

If you’re looking for more information about what you can and can’t do during the adoption process. You can visit your local adoption agency.

Will I be able to choose the adoptive parent (s)?

During the adoption process, you’ll be able to pick and choose the adoptive family of choice. We’ll help you find the right pick if you’d like anything specific. At our agency, we have young, older, single, hetero, and same-sex families, as you’re looking for adoptive parent (s). You could also decide where you’d like the birth child to live. 

Need help deciding which adoptive family to choose from? Don’t worry. At Adoption in Missouri, we’ll handle all your concerns. If you’d like, one of our adoption agents can take over finding the adoptive family for you.

Will there be counseling for the birth mother after the birth child has been adopted?

There is counseling for birth mothers during the adoption process and after. Some birth mothers go to counseling because they feel guilty. They feel like the birth child will grow to dislike them for placing them up for adoption. The birth mother doesn’t want to live with regrets, so they sit down and talk it out with someone. 

If you’re pregnant and considering adoption and would like to see a counselor. We can help you. Our agency has counselors on call ready to help when you’re ready.

What emotions do birth mothers go through once they’ve placed their child up for adoption?

After the adoption process has finished and the required time has come and gone. Some main emotions birth mothers may feel are guilt and regret. Some birth mothers feel guilty because they think about what the birth child will think of them. They wonder how the birth child will feel about being placed up for adoption. The birth mother will wonder if the birth child thinks the birth mother was giving a child up for adoption because they weren’t wanted. Regret comes when the birth mother is going through counseling, and the counselor asks, “how are they doing?” The birth mother will wonder if they shouldn’t have gone through the adoption process at all. While the counselor will tell the birth mother that if they hadn’t gone through the adoption process. The birth child will grow up neglected since the birth child was an unplanned pregnancy.

Thinking of placing your birth child up for adoption but are afraid of the adoption process? Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond. Please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri, call or text us at 816-527-9800