Unwrapping Holiday Joy and Grief for Birth Parents of Missouri Adoptions
By Mitchell Kennis
“Giving my baby up” for adoption can be a tough enough decision as is. What would make your adoption more troubling is having it overlap with the holiday season. The holidays are a time of celebrating the warmth and love a family provides. The process of how adoption works then seems to contradict everything the holidays stand for. However, the opposite is actually true.
When you choose adoption, you are choosing to share the love by expanding your family. Why stop with your adoption when you can also share new holiday traditions with your adoptive family? With that in mind, here are some suggestions to make every holiday season one to remember.
Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond. Please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri, call or text us at 816-527-9800
Adoption Support for Birth Mothers
Birth mothers who said, “I’m considering adoption – I can’t take care of my baby” have more to worry about generally. The stress of the holidays certainly does not help with this. If you or someone you know is struggling with an adoption, we will urge you to reach out.
Don’t just ask for help from your immediate family but also from your local adoption agencies in Missouri. Remember: agencies have adoption specialists who can talk with you about the feelings you have during this turbulent time. In addition, it is never too early or late in the year to ask for assistance with your adoption. Adoption Choices of Missouri will be open throughout the holiday season to help with whatever you need.
Celebrating Adoption and New Traditions with Your Family
This is your first holiday season with your adoptive family. Or this is a few days before your pregnancy is due as you prepare to “adopt out my baby.” It doesn’t matter when you are in your adoption process when the holidays come around. What does matter is how you choose to use the festivities to best spread the joy of adoption. Creating a new family tradition to share with your adoptive family isn’t so difficult if you know where to start. So, here are four ideas to get you thinking in the holly mood.
1. White Elephant Adopted Baby Shower / Gift Exchange
It’s not news to suggest a gift-giving tradition for your adoptive family. Thoughts that turned you to put my baby for adoption in the first place help make this idea more unique. All you got to do is twist the tradition, so it is focused more on your adoptive child. Instead of a hat with the names of family members, write gift ideas on slips of paper for your shared child. Set a spending limit and then go about making the “Christmas morning experience” for your child something special.
2. Wreath Making to Weave Together an Adoption Process
Most everyone can appreciate the smell of fresh-cut garland on a porch or over a mantle. There are plenty of guides online for how to weave wreaths, both traditional and inspired. Of course, the setup (and cleanup) for having such a tradition could be a tad heavier than others. But the results provide a representation of the ties you share through your private adoption.
3. Ornament Painting with Your Missouri Adoption Family
Along the same vein of arts and crafts, you could suggest decorating ornaments for the holidays. If you’re family’s the type to have a holiday evergreen tree, then you know there are enough branches to fill. Not only that, but your adoptive child can grow up with a simple, fun tradition they, too, can participate in.
4. End-of-Year Photo Collage Feat. Pregnancy, Adoption, and Traditions
A tradition that can really show time’s passage is a photo collage of the two family’s years. This is a tradition that might be better started this year but only shared next holiday season. However, there can be a great exchange to be had of your pregnancy and how the adoptive family is preparing.
The benefits of this tradition are numerous. For one thing, there will be a reminder throughout the whole year of your connection with the adoptive family. Another benefit comes in the finished product (whether slideshow or album) that shows your family.
Unwrapping Holiday Joy and Grief for Birth Parents
The lights and cheer can make your adoption harder to bear. Know that even if you aren’t celebrating the holidays the same this year, that’s alright. From now on, your holidays will have double the warmth and love from your adoptive family connecting with yours. If you are in need of extra support, however, please reach out to us at Adoption Choices of Missouri. We are always available to talk with you about your adoption and the struggles coming with it.