Spotlight on Single Parent Open Adoption in Missouri
When developing your adoption plan, you have a lot of options. As the birth mother, you are in charge. You get to decide what type of adoption and what type of adoptive family suits your needs and your baby’s best interests.
At Adoption Choices of Missouri, families hoping to adopt come in all shapes and sizes. Have you thought about single parent open adoption?
Why Choose a Single Parent?
There are many reasons to choose a single parent. Perhaps you were raised by a single parent yourself. Maybe you’re afraid that your child will have to witness or experience domestic violence or watch their adoptive parents go through divorce. Or, factors other than family size may be more important to you when choosing adoptive parents. Maybe you’re looking through profiles of adoptive families and you just feel a connection with a single parent. Trust your instincts and prioritize your preferences.
A single parent hoping to adopt has a lot to offer your baby, including
- Financial security
- Safe and stable environment
- Educational opportunities
- A strong desire to be a parent
- A strong support system of family and friends
All adoptive families at Adoption Choices of Missouri have passed interviews, background checks and home studies. All single adoptive parents who work with us are qualified to welcome your baby into their lives with love and care.
Why Choose an Open Adoption?
In an open adoption, you choose how and when you will communicate with the adoptive parent and your child before, during and after placement. You and the single adoptive parent have the chance to exchange contact information, and you can share medical information so that your child will have access to their health history.
An open adoption allows you to have a relationship with the adoptive parent and your child. It’s up to you how open and close that relationship is. Your comfort level and desires are important. Make sure you talk to your adoption caseworker so they can help you find an adoption arrangement and adoptive family that will meet your needs.
Every adoption plan is different and customized according to the birth mother’s wishes. Here’s what single parent open adoption might look like for you throughout your adoption journey:
- Matching: Once you’ve matched with the single adoptive parent(s), your adoption caseworker can coordinate a meeting. You could talk to the parent over the phone, schedule a video chat or meet in person so you can get to know them better.
- During Pregnancy: If you’d like, the adoptive parent could come with you to in-person doctor’s visits (be sure to check out your hospital’s COVID-19 visitor policies) or be present if you’re having an appointment over video.
- At Birth: When you’re making your hospital plan, consider what role you’d like the adoptive parent to play. Do you want the parent to be with you as you give birth? Do you want to spend time in the hospital together, just you, the adoptive parent and your baby? Or, if you’d prefer, the adoptive parent could be in the waiting room while you spend some alone time with your baby.
- Post Placement: After an open adoption has been finalized, you can stay in touch with the adoptive parent and be involved in your child’s life. Think about how often you’d like to be in touch. How frequently do you want to receive updates? Do you want to keep in touch by phone, email, letter or video chat? You could also agree with the single parent to visit in person. Do you want the adoptive parent to send you pictures of your child? Do you want to change the frequency and type of communication as your child grows up?
Is Single Parent Open Adoption Right for You?
There’s a lot to think about as you work with your adoption caseworker to create your adoption plan. Choosing the family who will raise your child is a big decision. Remember to respect your own needs. Share your feelings. Ask questions. Voice your concerns. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we are here to help you find an adoptive family.
At the end of the day, you want to select a family who will provide your baby with warmth, stability, love and opportunities. A single adoptive parent can do just that.
If you choose to have an open adoption and a single adoptive parent, your child will be able to know his or her adoption story. He or she will know that they are fortunate to have two loving parents in their life: you, who made a brave decision to choose adoption, and their adoptive parent.
Meet the Author: Zoë Bowlus, a writing and editing enthusiast, considers herself a grammar groupie and suffers from a weakness for wordplay and working with words, whether she is reading, furiously typing away, playing Words with Friends, or filling in the Sunday New York Times crossword puzzle.
She was adopted from Vietnam as a baby and began exploring her adoptee identity in Asian American Studies and Communication courses at UC Santa Barbara. As she combed through adoption literature for her last essay of college (she graduated with highest honors in 2020), she was inspired to use the research, editing, and writing skills she developed in college and her personal experience to create resources and share stories about adoption in a professional context. Writing for Adoption Choices, Zoë hopes to support people on their adoption journeys and to grow as an adoptee herself.
Zoë is an aspiring cat lady who is allergic to cats. She enjoys curling up with homemade hot chocolate, kettle corn, and a good book but laments the absence of a feline reading companion. Her bedside table and bookshelves are overflowing with World War II historical fiction, Asian American and Mexico-U.S. borderlands fiction, contemporary fiction, grammar and style books, and collections of profiles. She spends an inordinate amount of time playing bridge.
An avid NBA fan, Zoë lives in Sacramento, the primary reason anyone would root for the Kings. She holds out hope that they will make it to the playoffs during her lifetime.