Birth Mother Blog

Should I Buy My Child’s Adoptive Parents a Gift? 

Should I Buy My Child’s Adoptive Parents a Gift? 

Finding the perfect gift for someone can be a challenge. That feeling when you get it right can make it well worth it in the end. If you’re a birth mother entering into the holiday season, you might be asking yourself, Should I buy my child’s adoptive parents a gift? The answer depends on your individual situation, but Adoption Choices of Missouri is here to help you through the process. There are several factors to consider when deciding whether to buy your child’s adoptive parents a gift. 

If you need adoption help now, call us toll free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

1. Honor the Type of Adoption You Chose

The question of whether or not to buy a gift for your child’s adoptive parents begins with what type of adoption you have chosen. If you have maintained some level of contact with your child and his or her adoptive family, you can certainly consider purchasing a gift. If you have a closed adoption, it is best to honor the agreement and save your gifts for the other important people in your life. 

2. Respect Their Religious Beliefs

Another factor to consider is the religious beliefs of your child’s adoptive family. Maybe they don’t celebrate Christmas or Hanukkah. Perhaps they don’t participate in the tradition of giving presents during the holidays. If this is the case, it is important for you to respect these personal choices. If you find something perfect that you’d love to give them, you can always save it for another occasion. 

3. Keep in Mind Your Financial Situation

Buying gifts can become very expensive. If you are currently in a stressful financial situation, take a moment to calculate if a gift fits into your budget. While it can be tempting to lean towards more expensive items, remember that a homemade gift or a card can deliver a similar (if not more) heartfelt message. It is always important to keep your own needs in mind during the holiday season. 

4. Be Mindful of Your Feelings

Do not feel pressured to get your child’s adoptive family a gift. Try and take some time to tune in to your own feelings and emotions. Ask yourself why you want to give a gift to your child’s adoptive family. If you truly want to give a present because you are celebrating the holidays or want to do something kind for the family, that’s great! However, if you find yourself wanting to give a gift due to any less positive emotions, such as pressure to appear a certain way, it might be best to hold off. You can always reassess everything during the next holiday season! Remember, the decision to give a gift always remains with you. 

Should I Buy My Child’s Adoptive Parents a Gift? 

The most important thing to do when making the decision to buy your child’s adoptive parents a gift is to listen to your emotions. Remember, you do not have to do anything you are not comfortable with. If you need help thinking through the process, you can always contact your adoption caseworker at Adoption Choices of Missouri for some guidance. You can also turn to friends and family for advice and support. 

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Molly Doyle is a native San Franciscan, Molly is an experienced educator and a dedicated writer. She holds her multiple subject teaching credential as well as her Masters of Arts in Teaching. When not teaching children or creating new written pieces, Molly can be found kicking around a soccer ball, going for urban hikes or whipping up a fruit pie. 

She currently lives in Seattle, her first home outside of California.