Birth Mother Blog

I Gave My Baby Up for Adoption, Now What?

I Gave My Baby Up for Adoption, Now What?

By Nicole Hatton

Perhaps you’ve just made the decision to place your child up for adoption and created an adoption plan. Maybe you’re experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and want to learn more about the adoption process. Whatever the case, giving a child up for adoption is a major decision. As a birth parent, you may be wondering what you should do next or how to cope with your feelings. Post-adoption can be difficult for any birth parent. Whether you are young, single, or have a complicated relationship with the other parent, it’s valid to experience various emotions. If you’re considering adoption for your baby or want to learn more about the aftermath, here we will cover. . .

  1. Acknowledging Your Emotions After Choosing Adoption
  2. Coping With Your Adoption Journey and Letting Go of Your Baby
  3. Maintaining a Healthy Relationship With The Adoptive Family (If Open Adoption or Semi-Open Adoption Was Chosen)
  4. Personal Goals and Focusing on Yourself After the Adoption Process

Acknowledging Your Emotions After Choosing Adoption

It’s normal to feel a sense of grief, loss, confusion, regret, and more. Whatever emotions arise, don’t feel ashamed or embarrassed. It can be painful to bear with the thought of letting your baby go, and these feelings may stick with you. In order to find peace with your decision, it’s essential to come to terms with any and all emotions. If you do not accept or recognize your true emotions during the adoption process, you may struggle with larger problems in the future.

Give yourself the necessary time to reflect on your choice and consider if you want to reach out for more support. While addressing these feelings, remember that you made this decision out of love and the best interest of your child. Don’t let judgments or misconceptions from others who haven’t personally experienced adoption bring you down. Acknowledging your emotions earlier on would be beneficial to processing and healing.

Coping With Your Adoption Journey and Letting Go of Your Baby

There are a few things that you can do to look after your well-being and process things after adoption. Many adoption agencies, such as Adoption Choices of Missouri, have resources to support you. Adoption in Missouri can provide you with an adoption counselor who will work with you through the adoption process and discuss finances. They can also help you with understanding this decision and dealing with the loss of your child. This service is free and unlimited. However, not all American adoptions are the same, so be sure to double-check with the state you live in.

In addition to counseling, adoption agencies in Missouri will help you find birth mother support groups. You are never alone, and you can connect with other birth mothers to provide each other with support and encouragement. Each group will be different, but you can meet weekly or monthly, depending on what you all agree on. It can be comforting to find others who can relate to you and have that community who may share similar feelings. You can also share stories and talk more about your personal experiences to provide guidance and comfort. 

Another coping mechanism that you can use is journaling. Taking the time to reflect on everything can help you become more self-aware of your emotions and needs. There is no wrong way to go about journaling. Whatever makes you feel the best is the way that you should continue. Whether that is brain dumping, listing out things, doing a letter format, or something else, write whatever comes to mind. Journaling can help you gain clarity and de-stress by getting everything out on paper (unless you prefer a digital method).

Maintaining a Healthy Relationship With The Adoptive Family

If you choose to have an open or semi-open adoption, you can still stay connected with your child and the adoptive family. Having an ongoing relationship can provide you with reassurance and fulfillment for your child’s well-being. Having a healthy relationship with the adoptive family can help you develop a sense of trust as well. You can also ask questions as your child develops and grows older. If you would like to personally visit or talk with your adopted child, you can do so if you would like. If you feel more comfortable just talking to the parents and exchanging pictures, that is a nice option too. Whatever you decide will be up to you, but  Adoption Choices of Missouri will still be here for guidance and support.

Focusing on Yourself After the Adoption Process

After giving your child up for adoption, you may have more free time to focus on yourself. You can set personal goals, which could include studying for a degree, career exploration, or other hobbies and aspirations. You may have other responsibilities to take care of as well. Whatever your future endeavors may be, don’t forget that Adoption Choices of Missouri will still be there for you. No matter how long ago you went through with adoption, you won’t be alone.

Navigating and Adjusting to the Post-Adoption Process

Adoption is a decision that can be a lot to deal with and think about before, during, and after the process. Remember that you are not selfish for this decision or need the time to process everything. Feel free to take the necessary steps outlined in this article to help acknowledge and cope with your emotions. If you wish to stay involved with your child’s life, do so at a level that you feel comfortable with. It could also be a good idea to focus on other activities that you enjoy in your personal life or other goals.

Even if quite some time has passed after your adoption process, resources will still be available to you from adoption agencies in Missouri. Whatever you decide to do that feels best, know that you’re supported by Adoption Choices of Missouri and/or your own personal network.

Birth Mother Blog

I Gave My Baby Up for Adoption, Now What?

I Gave My Baby Up for Adoption, Now What?

By David Seamonson

Adoption is not easy, and there are many processes that can bring stress to you as the birth mother. During the adoption process, you are involved in every decision so that you and your baby feel like everything that could be done for you has been done. Dealing with the emotional fallout from the adoption is not easy. However, after the initial decision, there are a lot of additional steps that can be taken so that you can return to your normal life.

Private Adoption Services and Focus

At an adoption agency, there are a lot of private adoption services that are offered. Initially, from a 24/7 call line for every birth mother who wants to look into adoption. Then, we offer adoption specialists that will work with you so that you have all the facts when you make decisions about the adoption process. Our adoption specialists can direct you to the best family and provide financial assistance during your pregnancy. There is also a counseling service that comes from working with a private adoption service.

One of the specialties of a private adoption agency like Adoption Choices of Missouri is the focus on open and semi-open adoption. These adoption options have been proven to leave birth mothers more secure after complete adoption. Dealing with the loss of your baby is not going to be easy, and that is why the option to see them as they grow up can be beneficial to birth mothers. In addition, seeing how your actions have impacted your baby can eliminate certain feelings of grief, regret, and sadness from losing a large part of you.

Finding Adoption Counseling

An additional private adoption service that is provided to all birth mothers is access to 24/7 counseling. Emotions hit at very different times, which is why each of our certified counselors is available to listen to your thoughts and offer any help they can. This service is available at any time during the adoption process and after the adoption process when some emotions are more volatile.

Our specialists help identify why your emotions make you feel the way you are and understand you. In addition, they have experience with many other birth mothers who have gone through the adoption process and sought our help.

Post Adoption Support Network

While you might not need to always talk with a counselor through our agency, having a support network is the primary reason counselors are here for you. Not every birth mother has access to friends and family that will drop everything to help them, and going through the adoption process alone is even more difficult.

Having a person that you can turn to about what you feel about adoption or a need to understand why you feel the way you are can do wonders. As well to just having an additional person to talk to, the benefit of knowing that there is someone that can help you in times of trouble leads to more mental stability.

Move on, Life After Adoption

While it may be difficult to think about, moving on is why you came to an adoption agency like Adoption Choices of Missouri. Adoption in Missouri is not easy for all birth mothers. A process makes it easier for everyone involved to feel you are doing all you can in your life. It is also a way to leave parts of your past behind you. You did not know what to do when you learned about your unplanned pregnancy. When you looked for adoption agencies near you, you were looking for a way to move past your unplanned pregnancy, and we offered a way to do that.

Now that you have experienced all of the private adoption services available to you, you can do whatever you need to do to move on. There is no financial setback, and there are ways to help you through emotional stress, so moving forward and figuring out what to do with your life is easier now.

I Placed My Baby Up for Adoption, Now What?

An adoption agency offers its services to you to help you return your life to a way that makes you happy. The services it provides are available to all birth mothers seeking adoption, and you are no different. We offer our adoption specialists, adoption counselors, and a process to help you return your life to the best it can be. The world is open to you, and we want to ensure that your unplanned pregnancy does not hurt your future and that you feel you are in a better place now than you were before.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond. Please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri, call or text us at 816-527-9800