Birth Mother Blog Putting baby up for adoption

Unwrapping Holiday Joy and Grief for Birth Parents of Missouri Adoptions

Unwrapping Holiday Joy and Grief for Birth Parents of Missouri Adoptions

By Mitchell Kennis

“Giving my baby up” for adoption can be a tough enough decision as is. What would make your adoption more troubling is having it overlap with the holiday season. The holidays are a time of celebrating the warmth and love a family provides. The process of how adoption works then seems to contradict everything the holidays stand for. However, the opposite is actually true. 

When you choose adoption, you are choosing to share the love by expanding your family. Why stop with your adoption when you can also share new holiday traditions with your adoptive family? With that in mind, here are some suggestions to make every holiday season one to remember.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond. Please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri, call or text us at 816-527-9800

Adoption Support for Birth Mothers

Birth mothers who said, “I’m considering adoption – I can’t take care of my baby” have more to worry about generally. The stress of the holidays certainly does not help with this. If you or someone you know is struggling with an adoption, we will urge you to reach out. 

Don’t just ask for help from your immediate family but also from your local adoption agencies in Missouri. Remember: agencies have adoption specialists who can talk with you about the feelings you have during this turbulent time. In addition, it is never too early or late in the year to ask for assistance with your adoption. Adoption Choices of Missouri will be open throughout the holiday season to help with whatever you need.     

Celebrating Adoption and New Traditions with Your Family

This is your first holiday season with your adoptive family. Or this is a few days before your pregnancy is due as you prepare to “adopt out my baby.” It doesn’t matter when you are in your adoption process when the holidays come around. What does matter is how you choose to use the festivities to best spread the joy of adoption. Creating a new family tradition to share with your adoptive family isn’t so difficult if you know where to start. So, here are four ideas to get you thinking in the holly mood.    

1. White Elephant Adopted Baby Shower / Gift Exchange 

It’s not news to suggest a gift-giving tradition for your adoptive family. Thoughts that turned you to put my baby for adoption in the first place help make this idea more unique. All you got to do is twist the tradition, so it is focused more on your adoptive child. Instead of a hat with the names of family members, write gift ideas on slips of paper for your shared child. Set a spending limit and then go about making the “Christmas morning experience” for your child something special. 

2. Wreath Making to Weave Together an Adoption Process

Most everyone can appreciate the smell of fresh-cut garland on a porch or over a mantle. There are plenty of guides online for how to weave wreaths, both traditional and inspired. Of course, the setup (and cleanup) for having such a tradition could be a tad heavier than others. But the results provide a representation of the ties you share through your private adoption.

3. Ornament Painting with Your Missouri Adoption Family

Along the same vein of arts and crafts, you could suggest decorating ornaments for the holidays. If you’re family’s the type to have a holiday evergreen tree, then you know there are enough branches to fill. Not only that, but your adoptive child can grow up with a simple, fun tradition they, too, can participate in. 

4. End-of-Year Photo Collage Feat. Pregnancy, Adoption, and Traditions

A tradition that can really show time’s passage is a photo collage of the two family’s years. This is a tradition that might be better started this year but only shared next holiday season. However, there can be a great exchange to be had of your pregnancy and how the adoptive family is preparing. 

The benefits of this tradition are numerous. For one thing, there will be a reminder throughout the whole year of your connection with the adoptive family. Another benefit comes in the finished product (whether slideshow or album) that shows your family. 

Unwrapping Holiday Joy and Grief for Birth Parents

The lights and cheer can make your adoption harder to bear. Know that even if you aren’t celebrating the holidays the same this year, that’s alright. From now on, your holidays will have double the warmth and love from your adoptive family connecting with yours. If you are in need of extra support, however, please reach out to us at Adoption Choices of Missouri. We are always available to talk with you about your adoption and the struggles coming with it.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond. Please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri, call or text us at 816-527-9800.

Birth Mother Blog

 Using Birth Mother Support Groups To Make the Missouri Adoption Process Easier

Using Birth Mother Support Groups To Make the Missouri Adoption Process Easier

By Mitchell Kennis

Adoption is not to be taken lightly. The process can be extremely taxing on birth mothers who weren’t prepared for the commitment and even those who were. So, there is no shame in asking for help or talking with others about how you are feeling. Joining a birth mother support group is a perfect option to depend on others who can really understand you. Support groups help birth mothers talk through their doubts and feel more comfortable with their choice for adoption. 

What is an Adoption Support Group?

Let’s define what a support group is in general before getting into how adoption works with one. Support groups are individuals joined by similarly tough circumstances who talk through things and support one another. Each one is different in what ties its members together, but all work to take the stress off their shoulders. Some other distinctions can be the means of meeting and when, which can be online or in-person, weekly or monthly.    

A birth mother or adoption support group works in a very similar way. Women who are planning on “giving my baby up for adoption” meet with others doing the same. Those who already have put their baby up for adoption can also join a group of mothers who did too. There are probably many local support groups to choose from; take time to pick the one right for you. Local adoption agencies in Missouri will be more than happy to help you find a group if needed.

A Few Ways Support Groups Can Make Adoption Easier

Let’s say you aren’t convinced you need a support group. It’s fair to be skeptical. After all, your adoption process is your own unique journey. However, a journey needn’t be taken alone. No matter what form your open or private adoption takes, there are things others can do to help. With that, here are three things that a birth mother support group can do to support you.

1. A Place to Relate to Others Choosing Adoption in Missouri 

Groups created from a shared experience remain strong because of that commonality. You might be surprised how closely other birth mothers relate to your adoption story. Some women have gone through the mindset of “considering adoption – I can’t take care of my baby,” like you might’ve. Others will attest to your inconveniences of pregnancy. Still, Others could share your same adoption specialist, taste in music, or comfort food.

It is remarkable how many connections we can find with one another when looking for them. These bonds of similarity are bridges to trust and understanding. A support group can to help you by innately comprehending and sympathizing with where you are coming from. Your meetings can become a place to reflect on hard memories with the assurance others can relate.

2. A Space to Reside with Birth Mothers of Missouri Adoptions

The circumstances of pregnancy are not always ideal. An unexpected pregnancy leading into an adoption process is something perspectives from the outside don’t fully get. Birth mothers who say, “I need to adopt out my baby,” are sometimes heard but not understood. These scenarios can manifest in many ways, including a kind of alienation from one’s family or friends. An adoption becomes that much harder when you don’t have a space that feels considerate and safe.

A birth mother support group can play this role as a secondary home easily. You become a member of a community. A community that understands where you’re coming from, consoling you over dilemmas no one else fully gets. Other birth mothers who can just give you the comfort you need to relax. 

Life will come to break up the meeting eventually. You can rest assured knowing this space will be there at the next meeting.   

3. A Spark to Kindle Beyond Pregnancy

A dislodging of held friendships can come with the obligations of an adoption. There is power in choosing that “I’m going to put my baby up for adoption,” but others can’t fully appreciate that. After all, there are things you’d be giving up to do so, and your friends could be less than understanding about it. This doesn’t make anyone a bad friend, but sometimes pregnancy is viewed as an obstacle to fun.

Other birth mothers within your support group might not feel this way, however. Your meetings can provide the time to connect with these other women and make lasting friendships. Maybe you won’t find much outside of adoption that you can relate with them on, and that happens. A support group though provides an opportunity to talk with others you might not have otherwise. It is a time to compare show recommendations or vacation plans. Friendships can be as simple as that. 

Now We’re All in this Together for Your Adoption in Missouri

It is easy to say you are doing fine when you aren’t. Conversations with strangers can often feel shallow in how much emotion they hide behind an “I’m good, how are you?” With a support group, that changes. You are part of a group that cares about how you really are and helping your recovery into actually good. Adoption Choices of Missouri would love to help find you a birth mother support group that gets you for you. It is never too late in the process to ask for help, and we’re always here to provide it.    

It isn’t a bad option either to seek support with your adoption before finding a group. In such cases, your agency, Adoption Choices of Missouri, is here to serve birth parents statewide and beyond. Please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 816-527-9800

Birth Mother Blog Putting baby up for adoption

Missouri Adoption Support Through the Holidays

Missouri Adoption Support Through the Holidays

By Mitchell Kennis

To some birth mothers, the holidays can represent an unfriendly reminder of family. Unfriendly in that they are in the process of adoption, which means helping build a family outside their own. It is understandable to feel a fissure between your happiness and pregnancy, but there are ways of overcoming that distance. Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond. Please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri, call or text us at 816-527-9800

You’re not a Grinch, You’re a Birth Mother

Expectant women who are unprepared for parenthood find their way to a certain mindset. Usually, this is something akin to “I’m considering adoption – I can’t take care of my baby.” This pattern of thinking can evolve to “giving my baby up” for adoption, making yourself an enemy in the process. We want to let you know that choosing adoption is one of the bravest things you can do.

When you put my baby up for adoption, you are actually forming the best solution to a somewhat difficult situation. Your pregnancy, perhaps, was one you were not ready in your life to proceed with, not to keep yourself anyway. To stay with your pregnancy for the sake of your baby and have a life with another family is incredibly selfless. You are getting something out of it by not raising the child yourself, but you are giving so much more.

What we’re trying to say here is adoption has some pretty bad misconceptions. It sometimes makes birth mothers out to be women in it for themselves. Know that you are appreciated, and your adoption is going to create a very happy family. Which is possibly the best Christmas present anyone could ask for.

The Adoption Process and Holly Cheer

The days growing shorter, and the festive car commercials are not doing you any favors. You say, “I chose to adopt out my baby but wish the process didn’t make me feel a bit empty.” And yes, the holidays can be a hard time for pregnancies in general. It’s a bummer to forgo a new years party for another person, even if it is your baby. 

Making you feel alone is not what adoption is about, though. It can be a byproduct because of how adoption works, but the process, in general, is meant to reward. It rewards the adoptive parents with a new child they couldn’t have themselves. It rewards adoption agencies in Missouri with the satisfaction of another family pairing. Most importantly, it rewards you by supporting you through an unwanted pregnancy, no matter your circumstances.

It is the word “support” that is really important here. Despite how the holidays are making you feel, know that adoption isn’t something you have to face alone.

Holiday Missouri Adoption Support

Even if you’re in a private adoption or days away from your birth, your adoption agency is here for you. It’s surprising how under-utilized agency resources are, and Adoption Choices of Missouri is open 24/7 for calls and appointments. So, if you are feeling a little lost this holiday season consider one of these forms of support.

  • Therapy

The most direct way to get in touch with your holiday gloom is to talk it out. It can also be difficult to find someone who really relates to your situation in your life. Our agency offers consultations with adoption therapists who can provide such an ear. You will need to first set up a time to meet and provide some idea of what you’re looking for. It helps if your counselor knows the emotional triggers or effects you are aware of once you get to speak it out loud though you might get to the problem quicker.

  • Adoption Hotline

If you need to speak to someone right away, there is also our pregnancy hotline. You are almost guaranteed to have someone on the line minutes after calling. From there, we will be able to direct you to our other resources. Our adoption specialists can even just help reassure you that the process is going perfectly well.  

  • Birth Mother Blog

Maybe you are looking more to answer your questions and concerns about adoption with some reading. Instead of heading to the library, you can always click over to our blog. We have dozens of articles on all sorts of subjects surrounding adoption and its complications. Who knows, maybe the words of wisdom you are looking for were already posted in one.

Don’t be Afraid to Ask for Help through the Missouri Adoption Process

If, despite the lights and goodwill, you are feeling down about your adoption process, you should consider reaching out. Start by talking with your family or friends if you’d like. Or you can find us at Adoption Choices of Missouri, ready to help whenever you need. Our holiday hours are nearly unaltered to make sure we’re here for you.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 816-527-9800

Birth Mother Blog

All About Birth Mothers in Missouri

All About Birth Mothers in Missouri

By Mitchell Kennis 

Adoption can seem fairly daunting as a general idea. There are just so many different things for an expectant woman to think about when choosing adoption. We don’t blame you for being confused about where you fit within the process. So, we’re going to try and clear up who birth mothers are and how adoption works for them. 

What is Involved in an Adoption?

To cover how adoption works, let us give an example of an adoption process from start to finish. A disclaimer that this in no way covers all the ways an adoption can happen. 

A woman unexpectedly gets pregnant. She is not partnered and is busy getting a foothold in her new job. At first, she is overwhelmed by this news. Who wouldn’t be? But then she gets online and searches for pregnant adoption help. Thousands of results on the web covering stories and statistics, and histories of adoption fill her eyes. She tries again and instead searches for adoption agencies near me. Now she is directed to some pages that show promise and sends an email to a nearby agency wondering about consultation.

In no time, the expectant woman finds herself talking with an adoption specialist. She’s concerned about adoption. Worried she will never get to see her child and she is uncertain if the family would fit them. However, the specialist says she has the final say on the openness of the adoption and who the adoptive parents are. Together they will form a plan for the mother’s perfect adoption. 

Her fears dissolve, questions are answered, and the expectant mother moves on with her pregnancy. When she eventually gives birth, she will see her baby placed with its new adoptive parents. And years afterward, she can still receive email correspondence or visit if that was the type of adoption decided on. That is a basic adoption process for adoption in Missouri and nationwide.

But then, Who is a Birth Mother?

In the above example, the expectant woman would only be officially considered a birth mother after birth. Adoption Choices (and many other agencies) though consider woman birth mothers no matter where in the process they are.

The distinction is made between a birth mother and an adoptive mother to keep confusion minimal. This is especially true if the family and the birth mother have an open relationship. Using terms like “real mother” or “one’s own child” is quite demeaning to the adoptive family. It might, albeit unconsciously, undermine the respect of both sets of parents and make the relationship strained. And so, distinguishing a birth mother is a term born out of necessity.

Who Chooses Adoption?

The mindset of an unprepared expectant woman is they are considering adoption – I can’t take care of my baby. Unplanned or unwanted pregnancies happen. It’s not uncommon for this to be the reason why a birth mother would choose adoption. At the same time, the is no set rule that says someone without a clear reason can’t adopt. There are so many different adoption stories out there and even more circumstances, and no two are the same.

What we can say is people who choose adoption are brave. They have to push against the pressures of societal misconceptions about adoption. People think it means “giving my baby up” for adoption instead of a healthy alternative to parenthood. They might have to contend with a disapproving partner or family. And despite all the support an agency or their allies can provide, they themselves have to go through the pregnancy.  

Why Choose Adoption?

“Why adopt out my baby?” Well, there is not one clear answer to why one would choose adoption. The mother from our previous example decided to put my baby up for adoption because she was busy with life. That is a super valid reason to place her child with another family. However, another example could be that a birth mother decided to adopt instead of aborting her child. Another could be she already had kids and couldn’t even imagine raising another. Why people choose to adopt is as varied as who individuals are. 

Adoption is also a very rewarding process once your get into it. Depending on your situation, you might be eligible for financial aid and medical support for your birth. You get to know who the adoptive parents are and might even get to see your child be raised. It’s rather fulfilling to just know that you played a part in creating a happy family. 

Adoption can Help Create a Family

Just as no two adoptions are the same, so is each birth mother unique. You might have a dozen reasons to choose adoption or just one. Know that no matter what, though, Adoption Choices of Missouri is here to help. For years, our agency has been helping birth mothers plan for their perfect adoption. Our specialists are always ready to talk with you about your ideal family.  

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 816-527-9800

 

Birth Mother Blog Putting baby up for adoption

5 Benefits of Choosing Adoption

5 Benefits of Choosing Adoption

By Mitchell Kennis 

Here’s the scene: you are unexpectedly pregnant and are considering private adoption– I can’t take care of my baby. The problem is you aren’t sure how adoption works or if it would be right for you. We can’t know the specifics of your situation, but we can list five benefits of choosing adoption and why it can help. Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond.

Why Choose Adoption

The decision to “adopt out my baby” is certainly not one that comes easy. This is especially true when you are uncertain if adoption is a process worth the effort. So, here are five reasons why you should “put my baby for adoption” or contact one of our adoption agencies in Missouri today.

1. Adoption Means Forming a Family

Portrayals in most media paint adoption as though a person is “giving my baby up” for adoption. This is absolutely not the case. When you choose adoption, you are choosing to find a better future for your child. It is a selfless act that creates a family from parents adopting from you. It also helps you make a family on your own timeline if your pregnancy is unplanned. Someday maybe you still want kids but right now is not perfect. Adoption is a process of molding two amazing families into what they want to be.

2. Adoption is Full of Gratitude

If you go to our website or the forums of adoption, you will find very similar messages. Comments of thanks and blessings to those who chose adoption. Thousands of families are so grateful for the opportunity of parenthood. They have their reasons for needing adoption, and you would be providing that service for them. While there are those who will still be very incorrectly twisted about your decision, know you’ll have that family’s thanks.  

3. Adoption Comes with Support

It can be daunting to face the prospect of taking on adoption alone. But the thing is, you won’t be alone at all. Women seeking pregnant adoption help will find it in the form of any number of adoption agencies across the nation. Specialists will help plan through your adoption with you and ensure you have the necessary financial support. Even if you just need someone to talk to about your pregnancy, we urge you to reach out.

4. Adoption is Often Better than the Alternatives

If your pregnancy caught you by surprise, there could be some panic in how you see the options forward. There are women who rush into a decision after finding out they are expecting and maybe come to regret it. We’re just glad you are weighing your options by reading this, then. 

The three paths out of pregnancy are parenthood, abortion, and of course, adoption. If you are unprepared the raise a child at this stage of your life, parenthood isn’t ideal. Forcing yourself to be a mother can build into unconscious spite against your child for messing up what you had. Abortion is an option in some states but not in Missouri. Even still, the decision to terminate the pregnancy is one that doesn’t have an undo button.

Adoption, on the other hand, is a way to live and let live. You can be unburdened by raising a child without worrying about your baby not living life fully and happily. So, of the alternatives, it does appear like adoption is a perfect middle-ground.  

5. Adoption is Fulfilling

When you are choosing adoption in Missouriyou are actually choosing a path to family. You are opening a whole new future for your child and their new adoptive parents. Also, if you decide to have an open (or even semi-open) adoption, you get to see that future grow up. You will get to visit or receive correspondence from the family. You get to feel the secondhand benefits of parenthood without needing to parent yourself. Take it from so many others who have already taken the leap: adoption is fulfilling and worth it.

How to Get Started on Your Adoption

We hope that these facts have helped convince you to take the next step with your pregnancy by choosing adoption. Even if you still have your doubts, it is free to look up adoption agencies near me. It is also easy to contact us directly at Adoption Choices of Missouri. In either case, you will be connected to an adoption specialist who will assist you wherever you are at. Adoption is something that doesn’t require immediate commitment. You will get time to look through different adoptive parents and think more about what’s best. The resources are still here for you whenever you need them. So, please don’t be afraid to call or email to find out more benefits of adoption.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond. Please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri, call or text us at 816-527-9800

Adoptive Family Birth Mother Blog Putting baby up for adoption

All About Adoptive Parents

All About Adoptive Parents

By Mitchell Kennis 

Perhaps the biggest question on a birth parent’s mind before the adoption is: Who will my child be raised by? It is natural thinking when considering adoption – I can’t take care of my baby, so who will from now on? We’ll do our best to answer your questions about adoptive parents to make your adoption as stress-free as possible. Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond. 

Choosing Adoption in Missouri

First, let us cover the basics. Essentially how adoption works is a pregnant woman deciding she isn’t parenting ready will contact adoption agencies near me. From there, the agency will assist in the process of “giving my baby up for adoption.” An adoption specialist with consult with the birth mother on what she is looking for with her adoption. Details are taken, such as the type of adoption and what kind of family her child will be raised by. These are the main criteria that are used to sort through the families looking to adopt.

Once one or more families are matched with the birth mother’s preferences, she has consulted again. A birth mother will get the final say on the adoptive parents. After a selection has been made, the pregnancy will proceed as normal. The child, once born, will be put up with their new parents and home. Depending on the type of adoption, the process could end there, or communication between the two families could continue.   

Adoptive Parents

You might have already noticed, but we’ll also define “adoptive parents” if you’re planning an Adoption in Missouri. When you choose to adopt out my baby, the easiest path is through the process described above. Within this process, you (the birth mother) provide the basic guidelines for your child’s new family or adoptive parents.

Adoptive parents are either couples in the process of adoption or have already adopted. It is used interchangeably with an adoptive family, which is perhaps more accurate as there can be others besides the parents.     

Who Chooses to Adopt?

What we know is there is no catchall for who decides to adopt. However, all prospective adoptive parents must first jump a few qualifying hurdles before being considered for adoption. This includes background and medical history checks, attending an educational seminar on adoption, and passing a household check. They also fill out quite a bit of paperwork involving what they offer as parents. Through this paperwork, these parents are able to express who they are to searching birth mothers. Factors such as sexual orientation and religion and lifestyle can be expanded upon beyond what is required in bios.  

Women who put my baby up for adoption might be seeking a particular kind of parental relationship, though. You might, for instance, look for a family that has religious values similar to your own. If so, your adoption agency will certainly consider your personal preferences when presenting families to you right now. However, you can feel free to browse a listing of local adoptive parents on our website. 

The adoption process doesn’t discriminate. Adoptive families of all races and genders are represented, no matter their reason for wanting to adopt.  

Why Adopt?

There are many different reasons why a couple might pick adoption. We can’t pretend to know the particular circumstances regarding each adoptive parent. There could be problems with their ability to get pregnant themselves. They could be from an adopted family and want to continue supporting adoption in their own family. Perhaps they are “empty nesters” and need to rekindle the love of parenthood. 

If you are concerned about your adoptive parent’s reasons for adoption, you can ask them about it. Depending on the type of adoption, you will have the opportunity to meet with the family who will raise your child. During that meeting, you can ask what motivated them to adopt to better understand who they are.

How Do I Start the Adoption Process?

The start of any adoption process is asking for help. You can do this by looking for “pregnant adoption help” or contacting any local agency. This help need not only be related to finding a family to adopt your child but anything stressing you out. Agencies like ours are well-equipped to provide counseling and financial support for birth mothers. 

Choosing  the Adoptive Parents 

We know the perfect adoptive family is out there for you. But there is a lot we can do to help find them, too, so contact us at Adoption Choices of Missouri. We’re here for you and your baby, ready to ensure your adoption is a beautiful, faultless process. Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond. Please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri, call or text us at 816-527-9800.