Missouri adoption grief
Birth Mother Blog

Grief Associated with Adoption in Missouri

August 20, 2021

Grief Associated with Adoption in Missouri

While adoption in Missouri offers birth mothers and their babies a second chance, it can also a lot of grief associated with adoption in Missouri. Letting go of the child you’ve been carrying for nine months can be unimaginably heartbreaking, even if you know it’s for the best. However, even though grief may be a challenge throughout your adoption journey, it doesn’t have to define it. You don’t have to say goodbye to your birth child forever. Still, if you are struggling with grief at any point in your adoption journey, Adoption Choices of Missouri is here for you to offer you comfort, compassion, and a path forward.

Experiencing Grief as You Seek Unplanned Pregnancy Help

Grief can occur at any point during your adoption journey. It can even hit you before you’ve even started to consider adoption as an option. When you discover you are pregnant, you feel your life turn upside down. Maybe your college or career plans come to a halt. Perhaps it adds strain to a relationship. In any case, discovering you are pregnant when you aren’t ready to be a parent can cause you to grieve over the life you had. The grief can be so overwhelming that it’s difficult to think about the steps you will take to resolve your predicament. Grief shouldn’t hinder you from getting the unplanned pregnancy help you need. When you reach out to Adoption Choices of Missouri to explore your pregnancy options, our counselors can help you process all your feelings, so you can make a clear-minded decision for you and your baby.

Grieving Before and After Giving Your Baby Up for Adoption

Choosing adoption can provide you with a sense of relief that you will not have to take on the burden of raising a child when you aren’t ready to do so. That doesn’t mean that you don’t deeply care for your baby. The reason why you’re pursuing adoption is because you care for your baby and his or her future. At some point in your pregnancy, you will likely bond with the life growing inside you. It becomes more and more difficult to imagine another family taking your baby home. If you have already placed your baby for adoption, you may imagine what life would be like had you decided to raise the child. Holidays and birthdays might be difficult for you to get through. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, our counselors have vast experience in helping birth mothers get through their grief no matter what their circumstances are.

Coping with Grief as a Birth Mother

No matter where you are in your adoption journey or what you are going through, your local adoption agency is a wonderful resource for you to get the support you need. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, our adoption counselors are available to speak with you 24/7 so that you have full access to help whenever you need it. You never have to worry about being able to afford counseling since all our services are free of charge. Another way to get the support you need as a birth mother is by joining a birth mother support group. It can be comforting to be surrounded by other women who are going through what you’re going through. They can offer their unique insights, which can help you gain a broader perspective of your circumstances. These insights can be so powerful that they can play a key role in helping you come to terms with your situation so you can eventually find peace and closure. It’s also important that you establish a strong support network among the people in your daily life. Your own personal support network might include your partner, family members, neighbors, and friends. Incorporating these people into your support network can deepen the bond you already have with them. It also provides you with a sense of stability during this uncertain time in your life.

What Steps Will You Take to Get through Your Adoption Grieving Process?

Overwhelming feelings of grief can make it seem like everything is outside your control. At times, you might feel helpless in this situation that you did not choose to be in. While you can’t control what has already happened, know that you are always in control over the Missouri adoption process as a birth mother. If you are considering adoption for your baby, reach out to Adoption Choices of Missouri today. The sooner you seek our help, the sooner we can help you take back control over your life. Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Mary DeStefano is an Ohio native currently living in northern Virginia and works in the litigation consulting industry where she has experience in antitrust, product liability, and mass torts matters. She holds a B.A. in Economics (‘15) and an M.A. in Applied Economics (‘16) from the University of Cincinnati.

Mary is passionate about empowering and supporting those involved in the adoption and surrogacy processes. She finds great meaning in wielding the written word to develop impactful narratives and to help people stay informed. In her spare time, Mary can be found beachcombing and going on other adventures with her dog along the shores of the Chesapeake Bay. She also has an affinity for antiquing and loves a good 80’s movie marathon.

 

adoption misconceptions Missouri
Birth Mother Blog

Combatting 10 Common Misconceptions About Adoption in Missouri

August 6, 2021

Combatting 10 Common Misconceptions About Adoption in Missouri

Having accurate information about adoption is critical when considering adoption as a pregnancy option. While many view adoption in a positive light, there are still common misconceptions about adoption that can make some potential birth mothers and adoptive parents hesitant to pursue it. Misinformation can also result in birth mothers not properly tailoring their Missouri adoption plan to their needs, thus leading to problems later on. The reality of adoption is that it’s a wonderful choice for so many women and their babies, and it gives countless couples and individuals the opportunity to be parents. That’s why Adoption Choices of Missouri wants to clear up some of these common misconceptions about adoption that could be hindering you from considering it as a viable pregnancy option.

Common Misconceptions About Adoption in Missouri

  1. Giving Up Your Baby for Adoption in Missouri is Giving Up as a Parent

Choosing to place a baby for adoption is not a sign of failure as a birth mother. Rather, it’s a sign of being a resilient parent since adoption is not an easy choice to make. The fact that you are willing to commit to the adoption process and to a life without your child growing up at your side shows an incredible amount of strength and courage on your part.

  1. Choosing Adoption Is Selfish

Adoption is the very antithesis of selfishness. By choosing adoption in Missouri, you are offering your child a chance at a better life despite your parental instincts wanting you to keep your baby. Whenever you place anyone’s best interests above your own, you are anything but selfish.

  1. Birth Mothers in Missouri Are Mainly Teen Moms

While many teen moms seek out help during their teen pregnancy in the form of adoption, the reality is that women of various childbearing ages experience an unplanned pregnancy and pursue adoption. A woman in her 20s might pursue adoption if she has a career and financial goals she wants to meet before starting a family. Women in their 30s and 40s might already have families, and having another child might introduce additional strain, especially if the family is already facing economic hardships.

  1. A Child is Better Off with Their Birth Parents

Birth parents are not inherently better than adoptive parents. A child is better off with a couple or individual who can provide him or her with support, love, and stability. A biological relationship is not a prerequisite for these critical components of a healthy upbringing.

  1. LBGTQ+ or Transracial Adoptions in Missouri Are Too Complicated

While some people don’t support LGBTQ+ or transracial adoption due to outdated beliefs, others may be hesitant to pursue or support such adoptions due to concerns that the child might face hardships. It’s important to acknowledge that a child raised by LGBTQ+ parents or parents of a different race may encounter insensitive comments and looks or even discrimination from time to time. However, as society increasingly embraces diverse families, these concerns will likely diminish over time. Additionally, LGBTQ+ and transracial families are no less stable and loving than more traditional families.

  1. Single People Are Unsuitable to Become Adoptive Parents

It’s perfectly valid for a birth mother to want her child to grow up in a household headed by two parents. However, there are so many wonderful unpartnered individuals who are ready and able to be amazing parents. While single parenthood can provide unique challenges in raising children, many succeed in bringing up children to be well-adjusted and ready to face the world when they grow up.

  1. Putting Up Your Baby for Adoption Leads to Regret

Women who place their babies for adoption may experience periods of doubt about their decision. This is completely natural, but it doesn’t mean that they regret their decision. Often, they choose adoption after carefully weighing all the pros and cons of adoption and comparing them to other options such as parenting or termination. When they decide to pursue adoption, they are in complete control of the Missouri adoption process to ensure they are maximally confident in their decision, so they are less likely to feel regret.

  1. Birth Mothers Never See Their Children Again after Adoption in Missouri

One of the great things about adoption is that there is no singular type of adoption. In decades past, it was the norm for mother and child to be permanently separated once the child was born, with little chance of reunification. However, most modern adoptions entail some level of openness. This allows birth mothers to stay in touch with their birth children and develop a relationship with them.

  1. Openness in Adoption Violates Boundaries

While some people inaccurately believe that adoption leads to a permanent separation between mother and child, others assume that any contact between a birth mother and her child leads to confusion for the child and undermines the adoptive parents. Many adoptees are curious about their birth parents and may want to meet them someday. However, they understand that their adoptive parents are solely responsible for them and therefore have full authority over them. Additionally, adoptive parents and birth mothers agree on the role that the birth mother will play in the child’s life before the adoption is finalized to ensure everyone’s best interests are met.

  1. Birth Mothers Can Take Back Their Children in Missouri Adoptions

A birth mother reserves the right to change her mind about pursuing adoption up until the moment she signs over her parental rights to the adoptive parents. Once she relinquishes these rights, she can’t take back her child. Therefore, adoptive parents should not worry about losing their child after the adoption is finalized.

How Can I Further Educate Myself on the Facts about Adoption in Missouri?

The better informed you are about adoption, the more content you will be with your decision. Internalizing any misinformation about adoption can result in you not getting the most out of your experience or even avoiding it as a viable pregnancy option altogether, even if it’s the right choice for you and your baby. The earlier you can get all the facts you need to make an informed decision, the sooner you can successfully navigate the adoption process. That’s why you should reach out to Adoption Choices of Missouri today, so we can answer all your adoption questions and set you on the path that’s right for you. Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Mary DeStefano is an Ohio native currently living in northern Virginia and works in the litigation consulting industry where she has experience in antitrust, product liability, and mass torts matters. She holds a B.A. in Economics (‘15) and an M.A. in Applied Economics (‘16) from the University of Cincinnati.

Mary is passionate about empowering and supporting those involved in the adoption and surrogacy processes. She finds great meaning in wielding the written word to develop impactful narratives and to help people stay informed. In her spare time, Mary can be found beachcombing and going on other adventures with her dog along the shores of the Chesapeake Bay. She also has an affinity for antiquing and loves a good 80’s movie marathon.