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Transracial Adoption: Does Race Matter?

Transracial Adoption: Does Race Matter?

By Alexis Watson

The adoption process is a complex and sensitive process. The process can become more sensitive when you consider a multicultural or multiracial adoptive family. Race impacts the adoption process. While it might sound trendy to not see color, it’s important that color blindness is erased throughout this process. Here, we will explore the challenges and biases surrounding transracial adoption. In doing so, we hope it creates space for open and honest conversations about race and identity within adoptive families. 

Finally, we will be sharing all of the resources available to you by Adoption Choice of Missouri. Our adoption experts work with all potential adoptive families and birth parents. Our adoption agency accepts and encourages potential families to come as they are. We are aware of the potential issues that may come with transracial adoption. We understand the challenges of making a home multicultural. Our experts are here to help guide you through those issues and challenges. We want our adoptive families, birth families and child(ren) to feel safe, seen and heard. 

Transracial Adoption and Why Race Matters

When considering adoption in Missouri or anywhere, it’s important to discuss transracial adoptions. If you’re interested in moving forward with a transracial adoption, it’s important that you include it in your adoption plan. There are many nuisances to consider when placing your child with a family that doesn’t share the same racial background. As the birth mother, you may feel doubtful of your decision. This feeling is normal. Most adoption agencies are aware of the potential issues that transracial adoptions bring. We, at Adoption Choices of Missouri, work with our families to manage these nuances. 

There are many benefits offered to a child being raised in a same race home. The same race adoptive family will be better equipped to meet the cultural needs of the child. They will also be able to help the child build a strong identity culturally and racially. However, being adopted into a multicultural or multiracial family has its benefits as well. 

Your child being raised in a multicultural or multiracial family comes with many positives. It’s important that the adoptive family actively teach the child about their birth family’s cultural background. Their teachings will help the child embrace their cultural background. This will create a strong sense of identity and pride in their heritage. It will also help the child form and maintain healthy relationships with friends and family who share the same background. Growing up in a multicultural or multiracial home will expose the child to people from different cultures and/or races. The home will be centered on diversity. It’s crucial that the adoptive family commit to having open and honest conversations with the child about their cultural background. This commitment will help the child develop strong coping skills, a sense of self, and have a supportive community. 

Challenges and Biases Surrounding Transracial Adoption

As there are various benefits to transracial adoption, those benefits don’t come without challenges and biases. There are many stereotypical biases that plague adoption, but more so when we consider adoption for multicultural and multiracial families. 

When placing a child for adoption, there’s a chance the adoptive family may come from a multicultural or multiracial background. Historically, Caucasian families most often adopt outside their race. (Campbell). Just because a minority baby is raised by a white adoptive family does not mean that that child’s race will be erased. Nor does it mean that the child will have white privilege. It’s crucial that we address the racial differences. As mentioned earlier, being color-blind will cause more harm than good. It’s beneficial for adoptive parents to have conversations about race and the way it impacts them. 

Growing up in a multicultural or multiracial family may expose your child to racial prejudice, racism and discrimination. At the very least, your child will be flooded with race-related questions from peers about their parents and siblings. Some of these questions may be innocent, as their peers will want to know why the parents look different from the child. For those questions, it’s important for the adoptive family to educate the child on their culture and racial background. The earlier the conversations, the better. The child will feel less offended by the questions and more confident in responding. However, dealing with racial prejudice, racism, and discrimination is vastly different. 

While it’s fairly easy to expose racial prejudices, racism and discrimination, it’s not as easy to spot microaggressions. Everyone involved in the transracial adoption process might experience a few microaggressions along the way. A microaggression is a statement or action committed against a marginalized group. Microaggression can come from anyone: family and even friends. 

Transracial Adoption Resources

If you are considering adoption in Missouri and are searching for ‘adoption agencies near me,’ look no further. Adoption Choices of Missouri is here to guide, advise, and advocate for our birth mothers. Our adoption specialists are here to help with the hurdles of transracial adoptions and provide supportive counseling along the way. We provide medical care and adoption plan assistance. For those eligible or in need, we provide financial assistance for basic living expenses and safe housing. Our experts are here serving and helping pregnant birth mothers. 

If you have an unplanned pregnancy and need our help, give us a call today. We are excited to hear from you. 


  • Campbell, Leah. “Things to Consider When Adopting Transracially.” Verywell Family, 28 July 2021, Accessed 26 January 2024.
Blog Putting baby up for adoption

The Birth Father’s Role in The Adoption Process

The Birth Father’s Role in The Adoption Process

By Alexis Watson

Considering adoption in Missouri can be a very traumatic experience for birth families. Considering adoption for an unplanned pregnancy can be an emotional whirlwind to navigate. Birth mothers’ pregnancy journeys are individually unique. Birth fathers’ support throughout the pregnancy can offer a great sense of relief. Their support can be really meaningful throughout the adoption process as well. Though most agencies focus on the priorities and needs of the birth mother, the birth father is important. It’s important that you, as the birth mother, know your rights and the birth father’s rights. 

Adoption Choices of Missouri is an open adoption agency educating birth mothers on the adoption process. Our adoption counselors are here to advise birth mothers of their rights and the rights of the birth father. We provide adoption services and resources like medical care and support counseling. 

Coping With The Emotional Impact Of An Unplanned Pregnancy

Navigating an unplanned pregnancy can be difficult. There aren’t any life guidelines or protocols that tell anyone how best to handle the pregnancy. Each family and birth mother has to make the best decision for themselves. However, making that decision can be hard for a number of reasons. The main reason is understanding how you and the birth father feel about the pregnancy. 

As the birth mother, you will experience a whirlwind of emotions. You might experience shock, joy, anxiety, gratitude, worry, or sadness. You might feel each feeling independently, or you might feel them all at once. These emotions might intensify as you search for adoption agencies near me. Either way, whatever you feel is completely normal.

It’s also important that the birth father understands how he’s feeling about the pregnancy and fatherhood. It’s important that he communicates his feelings so he feels heard. It’s also important to understand where he stands. The birth father expressing his emotions will help with determining the next steps. As the birth mother, you should know how he’s feeling and his interest in being involved. 

Being faced with an unplanned pregnancy can be an initially shocking discovery. It’s critical that you and the birth father move past the shock and communicate your emotions about the pregnancy. This communication will help in determining the next steps for the pregnancy and each person’s interest levels of involvement. Having the birth father help during your pregnancy can make the process less stressful.  

The Birth Father’s Role During The Adoption Process

Being informed about the birth fathers’ rights for adoption in Missouri is crucial information for the birth mother. As the rights of the birth father can vary, it’s important to discuss their rights with your adoption counselor. Your adoption may be dependent upon it. 

There are many determining factors to consider when placing a child for adoption. Especially the birth father role. If the birth father is present, it’s important to know his view on moving forward with the adoption process. 

Birth fathers have the right to:

  • Be made aware of the adoption if identity and whereabouts are known.
  • Legally consent to adoption.
  • Contest the birth mother’s decision of adoption.
  • Support the birth mother during the adoption process.

The rights of the birth father are complex and unique to each adoption. If the birth father consents to adoption, then the adoption process can move forward. If he consents and chooses not to be involved in the adoption process, legal documentation should be signed. However, if he disagrees with adoption, then the next steps will need to be discussed with your adoption expert. If he disagrees with the adoption process, there is a possibility that the adoption won’t move forward. However, based on certain circumstances, adoption might still be possible. 

Normally, both parents must consent to adoption for the adoption process to move forward in Missouri. However, depending on the circumstances and the situation, the adoption process can proceed without the birth father’s consent. It’s important to talk to an adoption expert to learn the role of the birth father in your adoption journey. 

As each adoption journey is different, our experts at Adoption Choices of Missouri are here to help. Our counselors will meet with you, learn about your circumstances and inform you of the birth fathers’ rights. 

Adoption Resources

As the birth mother, it is important to know the rights of the birth father. Knowing their rights can help them move the adoption process smoothly. If you are unsure of what your rights are, contact one of our adoption experts at Adoption Choices of Missouri. We are an agency that educates, demystifies adoption stereotypes, and is considerate of your concerns. We provide our birth mothers with financial support, support counseling and medical care. Our counselors will help develop an adoption plan and, if eligible, connect you to additional resources. 

If you are pregnant and need assistance, give us a call today. Our experts are excited to work with you. 

Birth Mother Blog

Can I Choose The Adoptive Family For My Child?

Can I Choose The Adoptive Family For My Child?

By Alexis Watson


An unplanned pregnancy can be an emotionally overwhelming discovery. Having to place a child up for adoption can also be an emotionally traumatic experience. However, birth mothers should feel some comfort in knowing they have the right to choose their adoptive family. Birth mothers can choose an adoptive family that aligns with their personal beliefs and morals. They can choose an adoptive family that will raise their child with similar values. They also have the right to choose the level of communication they want with their adoptive family. It’s important that birth mothers find the right adoption agency that will guide them through the adoption process.

Adoption Choices of Missouri is a local adoption agency in Missouri helping birth mothers with their unplanned pregnancies. We provide services such as safety assistance, medical aid, and emotional support. If eligible, we also help with basic living expenses and other financial needs. 

What Is The Best Type Of Adoption For Me? 

Deciding whether you want an open, semi-open, or closed adoption is important. Your choice of adoption type matters and is included in your adoption plan. You will either meet the adoptive family or let the adoption counselor handle the entire process. The choice is yours. No matter what, you as the birth mother have the right to choose your adoptive family. Choosing the type of adoption you want will decide the relationship you have with the adoptive family and child.


  1. Open Adoption: Not only are birth mothers front and center when choosing the adoptive family, but they maintain a relationship post-adoption. Birth mothers and the adoptive family communicate regularly and as often as they like. Birth mothers are also in close contact with the child as they grow. 
  2. Semi-Open Adoption: This type of adoption is on a ‘need-to-know basis’ in regard to the development of the child. The birth mother will only get important life updates of the child. The communication with the adoptive family is based on important happenings in the child’s life. 
  3. Closed Adoption: The birth mother’s records are sealed and there is no communication whatsoever with this type of adoption. The birth mother doesn’t know the adoptive family and the adoptive family doesn’t know the birth mother. 


Whether you choose open, semi-open, or closed adoption, you have a choice. You have the right to choose the adoptive family for your child. The process of adoption in Missouri is complex, but as the birth mother it’s important to know your rights. Your adoption counselors at Adoption Choices of Missouri will help you guide you through the entire adoption process.

What Are Things To Consider When Choosing The Adoptive Family?

When choosing your adoptive family it is important to know what are some of your beliefs and morals. Understanding this will help in choosing the adoptive family. Ensuring that your child is raised by a family that holds the same values and beliefs can help emotionally.  Some things and questions to decide on and consider are: 


  1. Lifestyle: What is your ideal family structure? One parent; two? Are you open to the idea of a same-sex parent household? Do you want your child raised in the country, in a city, or in the suburbs? Consider some of the hobbies you want your adoptive family to have. Think about what you want their interests to be.
  2. Values: Is religion a deciding factor for you? If so, do you want the adoptive family to practice the same religion as you? Is cultural heritage important to you? Do you want the adoptive family to be a part of your culture and hold their heritage close? Consider what parenting philosophies you want the adoptive family to have. Think about what you want their parenting style to be when handling sensitive topics such as education, sex, and politics.
  3. Communication and openness: How do you want the adoptive family to communicate with you? Do you prefer video calls for major decisions? Are daily phone calls too much? Would you like to be considered when medical decisions need to be made? Consider how you want the adoptive family to communicate with your child as well. Think about how you want the adoptive family to hear and communicate with your child.


It’s important that you self-reflect on these questions and determine their level of importance to you. This is your chance to craft and pick the perfect family to raise your child. Be as selective as you’d like. 

Adoption Resources For Me

Adoption in Missouri can be a very easy process with the right agency. Researching adoption agencies near me will flood your device with hundreds of options However, you want to be as selective with choosing your adoption agency as you are with choosing the adoptive family. 

If you are pregnant and need help contact us, Adoption Choices of Missouri. Our adoption experts are trained counselors waiting to help guide you through the adoption process. Our counselors will ensure that you feel supported every step of the way. They will connect you to our team of resources and adoption network. They will also determine your eligibility to receive additional financial assistance. Give us a call today. We are here to help. 


Birth Mother Blog

Adoption Options For Your Unplanned Pregnancy

Adoption Options For Your Unplanned Pregnancy

By Alexis Watson

Being pregnant unexpectedly can be an emotionally overwhelming experience. You might feel shock, fear, joy, and confusion all at once. If you’re facing an unplanned pregnancy, it’s important to know all of your options and the resources available. First, let’s define what an unplanned pregnancy is, look at the surrounding circumstances, and learn about the resources. 

Adoption Choices of Missouri is an adoption agency assisting birth mothers with their unplanned pregnancies. Adoption in Missouri is a complex and sensitive process, and our adoption experts understand it. Our adoption counselors are experts in connecting our birth mothers to medical care, financial assistance, and support counseling. We work closely with each of our birth mothers in drafting their individualized adoption plans

What Is Considered An Unplanned Pregnancy?

An unplanned pregnancy is a pregnancy that is unplanned or not desired. According to the Office on Women’s Health, an unplanned pregnancy is really common. 1 in 2 pregnancies in America are unplanned. Unplanned pregnancies are a result of many things. Lack of access to and knowledge of contraception is the main reason for unplanned pregnancies. Some other reasons are contraceptive failures. Unfortunately, some unplanned pregnancies are the result of sexual violence and force.

Types of Unplanned Pregnancies

There are three main types of unplanned pregnancies.

  1. Unwanted pregnancy: An unwanted pregnancy is a pregnancy that is not desired at any time. 
  2. Unexpected pregnancy: A pregnancy that is earlier than the desired time for a planned pregnancy.
  3. Crisis pregnancy: A pregnancy that occurs in difficult circumstances. This type of pregnancy causes a high level of emotional, financial, and social stress. 

Determining the type of unplanned pregnancy will be easier when figuring out the next steps. 

Factors To Consider With An Unplanned Pregnancy

There are many factors that birth mothers must consider when learning about their unplanned pregnancy. Some birth mothers experience financial hardship, so caring for another is difficult. Some birth mothers are medically incapable of caring for a child. This means their medical conditions make it hard to provide a consistent level of care. It’s hard to care for and provide for a child independently without some level of support from family and/or friends. Some of our birth mothers don’t have that circle of support.

The Emotional Impact of an Unplanned Pregnancy

Being surrounded by support has a direct effect on the birth mother’s emotions. Discovering you’re pregnant unexpectedly can be an emotional process for any birth mother. Some experience joy and happiness for reasons personal to them. Others experience fear and anxiety for personal reasons. Birth mothers often experience a range of emotions throughout the pregnancy. The emotions experienced are completely normal. It’s important that birth mothers seek emotional support via counseling to help identify and manage their budding emotions. 

What Are The Options For My Unplanned Pregnancy?

Being pregnant unexpectedly means the birth mother will need help and support. There are three main options when considering the next steps for a pregnancy. 

  1. Parenting the child: Giving birth, raising, and providing a stable and secure environment for your child. 
  2. Terminating the pregnancy: As abortion is illegal in Missouri, consider talking with one of our experts at Adoption Choices of Missouri for guidance. 
  3. Adoption: It’s easy to research ‘adoption agencies near me’ when considering adoption. However,  Adoption Choices of Missouri is the best adoption agency in Missouri. Our experts will walk you through the process of adoption in Missouri

There are options to consider when you are planning the next steps for your unplanned pregnancy. Adoption is a life-changing experience that can be beneficial for the birth mother, the child, and the adoptive family. The adoption process is a complex one, but our experts at Adoption Choices of Missouri are here to help. 

Adoption Resources For My Unplanned Pregnancy

Adoption Choices of Missouri is an adoption agency providing nationwide care to birth mothers. Our experts are trained to provide expert advice to all of our birth mothers seeking guidance for their pregnancies. Our experts work closely with each of our birth mothers to create their individualized adoption plans. If eligible, we also provide financial assistance for basic living costs, including providing secured housing. Prenatal care is also offered to our birth mothers who are interested. Lastly, we provide support counseling to all our birth mothers. Adoption can be a traumatic experience for any birth mother. We want to ensure that our birth mothers are taken care of emotionally through counseling. 

If you are facing an unplanned pregnancy and are deciding what your next steps are, give our experts a call. Our counselors at Adoption Choices of Missouri are here, waiting to hear from you. 


  • Office on Women’s Health. 2021. Unplanned Pregnancy, (2022, February 22). Unplanned Pregnancy. Office on Women’s Health. Accessed 5 January 2024.


Birth Mother Blog

Adoption & The New Year: A Time For Healing And Growth

Adoption & The New Year: A Time For Healing And Growth 

By Alexis Watson

As the new year arrives, it provides a time for reflection and introspection. It is also a time for planning for the upcoming year and goal setting. Birth mothers reflecting on the next steps for their unplanned pregnancies will be experiencing a mixture of emotions. Some are considering giving their child up for adoption but are frightened by the process. Some are contemplating how they will achieve their goals while pregnant. Adoption in Missouri is a simple process, and our adoption specialists at Adoption Choices of Missouri are ready to help.  

Adoption Choices of Missouri is an open adoption agency that provides adoption services to birth mothers across Missouri. We provide support counseling to our birth mothers through every stage of the adoption process.  If eligible, we provide financial support, safe housing, and prenatal care. Our counselors will work closely with each birth mother to craft their unique and individual adoption plan

Adoption For The New Year 

Birth mothers considering adoption in the new year might be filled with questions and conflicting emotions. The new year is traditionally a period of self-reflection. It’s a time for checking the boxes on the goals and dreams you’ve been able to accomplish. It’s also a time for vision boards and new goals to be created. However, an unplanned pregnancy can make this traditional time feel slightly unnerving. Considering adoption while heading into the new year might stir up feelings of confusion, guilt, and uncertainty. However, adoption can be an empowering decision for birth mothers, adoptive families, and the child. 

Adoption can be a positive experience for everyone involved. Birth mothers will have a sense of fulfillment as their child will be with the adoptive family of their choice. The child will have a support system from both their adoptive family and their birth family. The adoptive family will have the opportunity to have and raise a child. Open adoption will allow for an open line of communication between the birth mother and the adoptive family. This form of adoption will foster a strong sense of identity and belonging. Adoption has many benefits for everyone involved.

Healing Journey Post-Placement

Considering adoption can be a frightening experience to think about as the process may be unclear. Trying to locate a local adoption agency might be overwhelming. However, those things should not deter you from beginning the process. Our adoption specialists at Adoption Choices of Missouri are here to connect birth mothers to the available resources. Once the adoption is finalized, our counselors encourage each of our birth mothers to create a self-care routine. 

The adoption process can be an emotionally taxing experience as different emotions can arise causing conflicting feelings. It is important that birth mothers, like yourself, are especially gentle with themselves as they are healing from the process. A great way to start the healing process is to develop and maintain a self-care routine. A self-care routine provides birth mothers with time to prioritize themselves and their well-being. 

Another way to support the healing process post-adoption is becoming involved in support groups. Meeting with other birth mothers and hearing their adoption journeys can be empowering. Connecting with someone else who has gone through the adoption process can feel less lonely. Advice, tips, and lessons learned are often shared during these safe spaces. These groups encourage birth mothers to accept their decisions without judgment. Support groups create a safe space for birth mothers to share their adoption experience authentically and confidentially. These groups are known for fostering connection, building community, and providing support. 

It’s important that birth mothers feel supported after making such a life-changing decision. Adoption is a rewarding experience not only for birth mothers but for the adoptive family and child. 

Life Passions Post-Adoption

Adoption is a life-altering decision. However, the emotional impact of this decision can leave you feeling a sense of grief and sadness. Your emotions are normal. As you heal and grow from your grief through self-care and support groups, it’s also important to discover new interests. 

Catering to your healing journey is an important step in the healing process post-adoption. Pursuing interests, fulfilling life goals, and discovering new passions are just as important. Accomplishing new passions provides birth mothers with a sense of personal growth and fulfillment. It’s important to continue to pursue your life’s dreams and discover new passions. 

Our Adoption Specialists Are Here To Help

If you’re considering adoption for your unplanned pregnancy, our experts at Adoption Choices of Missouri are here to assist you.  Our adoption specialists are trained to provide emotional support through counseling and connection. We provide each of our birth mothers with financial assistance for basic living expenses if eligible. If available, we also provide medical care for birth mothers interested in receiving prenatal care. 

If you need assistance with your unplanned pregnancy, give us a call today. 

Birth Mother Blog

Help! I’m Facing Hardships While Pregnant

Help! I’m Facing Hardships While Pregnant

By Alexis Watson

Adoption may not be an easy choice, but sometimes it’s a necessary choice. Birth mothers who are experiencing homelessness, battling addiction, or suffering from abuse considering adoption may be their  only choice. An unplanned pregnancy can be an emotional revelation for any woman. Navigating hardships like homelessness, addiction, or abuse during pregnancy can intensify stress levels. Adoption can be an empowering choice. You will be able to secure a permanent, safe, and loving home for your child. As the birth mother, you will be guided and supported every step of the journey.

Adoption Choices of Missouri is an open adoption agency in Missouri. We provide financial aid and emotional support to our birth mothers. Every birth mother is paired with an adoption expert who will explain every step of the adoption process. Our experts help create the adoption plan and ensure birth mothers are connected to the right resources.   

The Adoption Process

Giving your child up for adoption is an empowering and positive choice. Guaranteeing a safe, healthy, and loving environment for your child is a rewarding decision. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we walk our birth mothers through each stage of the adoption process.

The steps for adoption in Missouri: 

  1. Contact one of our experts at Adoption Choices of Missouri. We are a welcoming and safe space for our birth mothers.
  2. Meeting with one of our adoption specialists. Our specialists are always eager to meet new birth mothers. We are able to do in-person or virtual meetups. You let us know what your comfort  levels are. 
  3. Create your adoption plan. Every pregnancy is like a snowflake; no two are the same. The same goes for when we create your adoption plan. Each adoption plan is catered to the specific needs of our birth mothers. You’ll include pertinent information such as your delivery option, your financial budget, and approved medications. 
  4. Choosing the adoptive family. Your level of involvement in choosing the adoptive family is up to you. You have the option of working closely with our experts in reviewing and choosing the adoptive family.
  5. The baby arrives. Your adoption plan will also outline your delivery plan. This will include everything from the aesthetic of the room to what medications to administer. Don’t worry;our specialist will be present for this special day. 
  6. Post-Adoption Support. Our experts will provide emotional support via counseling. Healing and coping with a life-changing decision takes time and support. We also provide financial support for pregnancy-related expenses. 

Adoption in Missouri is a simple process that provides every birth mother with a choice. Our adoption counselors at Adoption Choices of Missouri are there to walk birth mothers through every part of the adoption process. 

What Adoption Resources Are Available?

As a birth mother considering adoption, it can be difficult to know what resources are available to you. It can be just as difficult to know how to access those resources. Our staff at Adoption Choices of Missouri are trained to connect you with the right resources. We will also provide support and counseling to all of our birth mothers. It is important to us that our birth mothers feel comforted and supported from beginning to end. 

As a birth mother, we provide a ton of available resources to you. We provide financial assistance with pregnancy-related expenses during pregnancy.  Financial assistance can cover every living expense, like food, transportation, and maternity clothes. We also provide assistance for rent, utilities, and phone bills. Your eligibility for financial assistance is dependent on your current living situation. We try to meet our birth mothers where they are and provide the most support we can. 

As a birth mother, medical expenses are a given, as medical care is a must. We are strong advocates for the health of both our birth mothers and their children. In ensuring that advocacy, we help with prenatal care. Safety for our birth mothers and their children is also a top priority of ours. Stable housing is a safe haven that can help alleviate stress by providing consistent security. A good night’s rest provides everyone with the mental clarity and space needed to make informed decisions. For any of our birth mothers experiencing homelessness or facing any hardships, we are here to help. We will provide safe housing, as it is an essential space for birth mothers. 

Can I Maintain A Relationship With The Adoptive Family? 

Adoption does not automatically terminate communication with your child. Open adoption is one of the options that fosters a relationship between the adoptive family and the birth mother. As an open adoption agency, we support and encourage birth mothers to explore their options. 

Open adoption allows for an open line of communication between the birth mother and the adoptive family. Semi-open adoption only allows for important life developments to be shared. Finally, closed adoption is just that – closed. No information is shared between the birth mother and the adoptive family. 

Let Our Adoption Experts Help

Facing challenging hardships during pregnancy is difficult for any birth mother to navigate through. Adoption might be your only option, and that is okay. You are not alone, nor do you have to do this alone. Adoption is an empowering and courageous choice. Our experts here at Adoption Choices of Missouri are here, ready to help. If you are pregnant and need adoption assistance, give us a call. We are here to help. 

Adoption agencies in Missouri Birth Mother Blog

Unwrapping Holiday Joy and Grief (for birth parents)

Unwrapping Holiday Joy and Grief (for birth parents)

By Alexis Watson

Adoption can be a frightening thing to consider, especially with all the negative stereotypes and misinformation surrounding it. Instead, considering adoption should be seen as the powerful choice that it is. Adoption in Missouri is a life-altering and gratifying decision-making process for a lot of birth mothers. Adoption is an empowering choice because it allows you to manifest a secure future for your child. Giving a child up for adoption shouldn’t be a stopping point in your parental or life journey. It’s an experience along the way. Now that the experience is over and the adoption is finalized, what’s next? 

Well, first, our counselors here at Adoption Choices of Missouri are here to guide and support you. We are here to provide our birth mothers with unconditional support and guidance for their unplanned pregnancies. Trying to navigate the next steps post-adoption can be scary, but that’s what our counselors are here for. We’re here to help our birth mothers tap into all of their support networks.

I’ve Finalized The Adoption Process And Am Experiencing A Lot Of Emotions.

You’ve finalized your adoption, and you are experiencing a flurry of emotions. You might feel a sense of gratitude now that the adoption process is over. But you might also feel a sense of emptiness. The past year, you’ve been focused on your health, your pregnancy, and creating an adoption plan. Now that the adoption process is done, you may be unsure of what to do next. 

In trying to determine the next steps, you might be considering whether children in the future is an option for you. Parenthood ending at adoption is a common misperception. Adoption does not forfeit your opportunity to have children in the future. Birth mothers can and often do have more children in the future.

It’s not uncommon to experience periods of guilt throughout the adoption process even when considering having future children. It’s important that when our birth mothers feel these emotions arise they speak to one of our counselors. Our counselors at Adoption Choice of Missouri are here to provide emotional support via counseling.  

Navigating Life Post Adoption

Finalizing the adoption process can stir up waves of conflicting emotions. That’s completely normal and okay. Acknowledging your emotions and talking them through sets the foundation for the coping and healing process. When coping with a life-changing experience, it’s important to tap into your network of supporters. Your network of supporters might be: 

  • Family. Finding family members who support your decision and will offer unwavering support during your process is critical. It can be your parents, a sibling, an aunt or uncle, a cousin—anyone. It’s important to lean on family members that you trust to help support you through this. 
  • Therapist/Counselor. Once you’ve finalized your adoption with us at Adoption Choice of Missouri, we will continue to support you. We schedule regular counseling sessions with all of our birth mothers who choose to speak with a counselor. We help birth mothers like you navigate difficult decisions and share tips on how best to manage emotions. 
  • Support Groups. A support group is a great way to connect and foster relationships with other birth mothers on their adoption journey. Support groups are known for providing a safe space, words of encouragement, and advice. 
  • Friends. Connect with your friends and let them know what’s going on. Share how you’re feeling, how you’re doing, and how you need them to support you. Don’t be shy about telling them about the ways they can support you. Be open and honest with them about what your needs are. You might be surprised at how they can help. 

As you navigate the final stages of your adoption process, stay connected to those who love and support you. 

How Can My Self-Care Routine Help With My Adoption Process?

Healing and coping through the adoption process will look different for everyone. An unplanned pregnancy can be an emotional journey. The adoption process can be as well. As you go through these emotional journeys, it’s important that you love yourself a little extra. The best way to show yourself extra love is by establishing a self-care routine. 

Some might wonder how and if a self-care routine can help during this process. The simple answer is yes, it does. A self-care routine will allow you to declutter your mind, identify your emotions, and move with intention. It’s an empowering practice that will help you center and align your body, mind, and spirit. Adopting a habitual self-care routine post-adoption will help you navigate your next steps. 

When developing a self-care routine, it is important that you:
  • Choose to do something you like doing. Find that thing that you enjoy and helps you feel centered. It could be something small like taking a bubble bath while listening to music. It could be something more active, like going to the gym and lifting weights. Find the thing that helps revitalize you. Doing something you like to do only solidifies the consistency of the practice. 
  • When choosing the thing you like to do, consider if it’s already a part of your everyday life. If it isn’t, think about ways you can incorporate it into your daily routine. Can you squeeze your routine in before breakfast, during lunch, or after work? Figure out a way that you can merge your daily routine and self-care routine so the two can coexist. 
  • Create a schedule. A self-care routine is not a routine if you practice it infrequently. Be intentional about showing up for yourself. Put it on your calendar. You can practice it daily or every other day. It’s important that you practice it at least once or twice a week. 
  • As you develop and practice your self-care routine, remain flexible. One day the timing for the routine may work, other days it won’tYou might have too many things on your schedule that day. You might be running behind on time. Whatever the reasoning is, know that it’s okay. 

Figuring out life post-adoption can seem complicated, but it doesn’t have to be. It’s important during any stage of the adoption process that you, as a birth mother, stay connected. Stay connected to your networks of support and with your counselors here at Adoption Choices of Missouri. We are here to help guide and support you through counseling and connect you to our pool of adoption resources. 

If you are pregnant and are considering adoption, give us a call today. Our experts are ready to answer any question, provide more information, and share resources.

Birth Mother Blog

Unplanned pregnancy and choosing adoption during the holiday season

Unplanned Pregnancy and Choosing Adoption During the Holiday Season

By Alexis Watson

Holidays are a time for laughter, cheer, and joy. It’s the season of giving and being surrounded by loved ones. However, you are staring back at a positive pregnancy test. You become acutely aware that you are not able or ready to raise a child. As you are engulfed in the holiday spirit, you feel everything but happiness. Now, being faced with unplanned pregnancies, you are battling mixed emotions. An unplanned pregnancy can cause feelings of fear and confusion.

You are conflicted as you are considering adoption. You’re wondering how the child’s father and our family might react as you contemplate giving a child up for adoption. Adoption has since been riddled with negative stereotypes, and misinformation has been shared. Panic might set in as questions about adoption, the adoption process, and which steps to take race through your mind. But, not to worry. Our expert team at Adoption Choices of Missouri will guide you through all of the resources available to you. We will answer all of your questions, hear your concerns, and talk through your fears. We want you, as the birth mother, to feel secure and informed when making a life-changing decision. You aren’t abandoning your child. You are giving them a future. 

The Adoption Process in Missouri

Step 1: Adoption Agencies

The first step when deciding on adoption in Missouri is finding an adoption agency. We have many adoption agencies in Missouri that will be more than willing to help. You can give us a visit or call anytime. Our experts are readily available to help pregnant women and birth parents create a unique adoption plan. We understand how emotionally taxing the adoption process can be, so we provide emotional support through counseling. We also strongly encourage all of our birth mothers and families to develop and practice a good self-care regime. Emotional health is just as important as physical and mental health. 

Step 2: Adoption Plan

Now you’ve met with an expert at one of our local adoption agencies in Missouri, let’s draft your adoption plan. An adoption plan allows you to voice and implement your wants and desires for you and your child. The decision is yours. Our specialists at Adoption Choices of Missouri will cater to your adoptive needs. You have your adoption plan outlined, given birth, and you’ve chosen the family, so what’s next? 

Step 3: Adoption Resources 

The adoption process and adoption plan have stirred up a concoction of conflicting emotions. It is important that as you go through these emotions, you identify each one. The emotional impact on those considering adoption is unique to each person. Our specialists at Adoption Choices of Missouri understand and are aware of this. Our experts will connect you with our trained counselors to help you get through those conflicting emotions. They will help you identify those emotions, understand them, and cope with them. Being and maintaining your emotional health is crucial throughout the adoption process

Can I Receive Financial Assistance During The Adoption Process?

Adoption in Missouri for you and other birth mothers is free. There is no cost to you. But what about assistance? You are struggling with housing, and/or you are having a hard time covering your pregnancy medical costs. No worries. We offer financial support to those eligible. 

Once you meet with our experts, draft your adoption plan, and your needs are accessed, we will make a determination on your eligibility. If you are eligible for assistance, we at Adoption Choices of Missouri will be able to provide you with assistance based on your needs. We will be able to assist by covering some living expenses and medical bills related to the pregnancy. Our experts will make a determination of how much assistance is needed once they develop your adoption plan. Considering adoption is already worrisome, we don’t want you or our birth mothers to undergo any additional stress. The baby’s health as well as yours is vital. 

Choosing Adoption in Missouri

Considering adoption for your unplanned pregnancy is a difficult decision to make. You are now tasked with making the best decision based on you and your child’s needs. Sometimes those needs can conflict with one another causing an emotional stir. It is important that you know you are not alone. 

Our agencies and staff are trained and ready to help guide and support you through this process. We offer emotional support, counseling, and financial assistance based on eligibility. We will listen to your fears, concerns and answer any questions. One of our goals is to be a strong advocate for birth mothers like you. We will help you make the best decision for your child’s future. 

If you are ready and in need of support and guidance, call Adoption Choices of Missouri. We can’t wait to hear from you.