Birth Mother Blog

Adoption is Not Giving Up

Adoption is Not Giving Up

Adoption Choices of Missouri knows all too well what birth mothers face when they first come to the decision that adoption is the best choice for her and her baby. The criticism she may face from family. How she could possibly be shamed for “giving up her baby.” That adoption is something to be ashamed of. It’s not an easy situation to be in, and it can be harmful to your mental health.

But, we want you to know that nothing could be further from the truth. Adoption is not giving up! It’s the exact opposite. What’s more, we’re going to encourage you and share with you exactly how!

Adoption Means You’re Putting Your Baby’s Needs Over Your Own

To truly care for another unconditionally, you have to want the best for them no matter the circumstances. For birth mothers, you know the sacrifices and heartache that comes with the realization you’re not the right person to raise your child. When you know what needs to be done. It is a bittersweet decision, but one you know will benefit both your and your baby.

You love your baby deeply. So much so that you have the willpower to place him or her in the care of an adoptive family, who you trust will love, care and support your child in the best ways possible. Your adoption plan is not an exit strategy or a way of giving up. Rather, it is one of the most loving gifts you could ever give.

Adoption Gives You and Your Baby a Chance at a Better Life

There are so many things to find joy in when a baby is given to an adoptive family or when a birth mother completes her adoption plan. Think of all the new possibilities and opportunities that can now be utilized. All the once closed doors have been reopened again! There’s so much potential for both you and your baby.

For many birth mothers, they just want to get back to their lives. They want the normalcy of their lives restored, and that is nothing to be ashamed of. It is human to want routine, safety, and clarity in our roles and lives. Some still have some living they would like to do before they fully commit to parenthood. Others may feel that parenthood is no longer a future desire they have. Both are valid reasons for choosing adoption.

Do not feel guilty for having ambitions or still having pursuits you’d like to pursue. You are no less of a person for having those wants, and it does not diminish your worth in any kind of way.

Adoption Allows Your Baby to Grow Up Happy and Healthy

When you connect your baby with an adoptive family of your choice, you are not giving up. You are  creating a new family, and bridging yours and theirs together. To have a power such as that is not only a gift, but a great honor that should not be stigmatized or ridiculed in any sort of way.

The bottom line is for your baby to grow up happy and healthy. That is the most important thing and will always remain so.

No matter whether your adoption plan is closed or open, your baby still gets that hope of a better future and you have a huge weight of stress lifted off your shoulders.

There is So Much Love in Adoption

We know your struggles and testimonies. We know how overwhelming it all can be in the beginning. But, nonetheless, every birth mother rises and pushes to get the resources she and her baby need to succeed in life. The challenges she faces, whether it be from family, friends, or maybe even some emotional obstacles, will undoubtedly take their toll. In the end, she is always supported by her adoption agency of choice and is carried by her support system.

The inner workings that go into adoption choices and plans are so full of love and community, it is hard to picture it as something cruel. Adoption is not giving up or giving your baby away. It is giving your baby another chance. It is giving yourself another chance. This is why every year National Adoption Day is celebrated. Why there are leaders and luminaries who come together to support this special occasion. This is why all people of faith, color, and background have stories to tell about their own adoption.

Adoption is Not Giving Up

With so much diversity and a sense of togetherness, it is hard to see adoption as a way of “giving up your baby” or even “giving your baby away.” No. Adoption is one of the most ultimate of sacrifices that comes out of love and longing for your child to have a better shot at life.

This is not something to shame birth mothers for, but it is one that deserves praise. Adoption, and your decision to place your baby for adoption, deserves the time and space to be recognized as a choice borne out of heroism, not guilt.

Be encouraged, be brave. For all things adoption, find us here and let’s get started on your adoption plan today.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: My name is Alexander Charles Cooper, I come from a family of four that originates from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. I, along with my younger brother Greyson were born in North Carolina, three years after my parents had wed and moved to the state. Alexander shares his birthday with Maya Angelou, which he takes great pride in.

Growing up, Alexander had the privilege of having both parents in his life and a stable upbringing in which he was surrounded by family and friends. He believes that much of his family foundation is built on faith which has given him a discipline and practice that has allowed him to discover and build his spiritual self. He is also interested in politics and worldly news that allows him to excel in American literature, philosophy/ethics, and higher learning.

From that, his passion in writing bloomed and he found his true calling: “I wished to create and write for a living and know it will be what makes me happiest. My only wish is for me to bring about positive change for others both near and far and leave a lasting legacy that contributes to the overall wellbeing and joy of others.”