3 Types of Adoption: Which is Right for You as a Birth Mother in Missouri?
Placing your child up for adoption is such a hard but rewarding decision. One hard part of the adoption process is deciding on what type of adoption you want for your child. You, as a birth mother, have three options: open, semi-open, and closed adoption. Each of the three types of adoption comes with a level of interaction and allows you to choose what would fit your comfort level, and what is best for you and your child.
As a birth mother considering adoption, we at Adoption Choices of Missouri have listed the three types of adoption to help you determine which is right for you as a birth mother and your adoption journey.
Types of Adoption Available to You as a Birth Mother
1. Closed Adoption
The first type of adoption for you to consider is a closed adoption. Many decades ago, adoption was handled very differently. There was a lot of secrecy surrounding birth mothers who experience unplanned pregnancies. So much so, in fact, that pregnant women were sent away to have their babies in private. They were then told to return to their everyday life like nothing happened. The babies born were given to families, and the birth mothers weren’t able to find out where they went or what happened to them.
Closed adoptions are still available for birth mothers and adoptive families today, but aren’t as frequent. However, we understand that each and every adoption journey is unique, and that this may be the right choice for a birth mother, depending on her life circumstances.
What does a closed adoption look like? In short, this type of adoption is confidential and doesn’t permit any communication to happen between you, your child or your child’s adoptive parents. Likewise, no personal information is shared. Your child will not be able to know anything about you until they turn 18 years of age, or whatever age is deemed an adult in their home state. If you want to have complete privacy, this may be the right choice for you.
2. Open Adoption
The second major type of adoption for you to consider is known as open adoption. This is the complete opposite of closed adoption, and has become the more popular choice in today’s adoption world. As an adoption agency, we strongly advocate for all our birth mothers and adoptive parents to think about open adoption because we believe it keeps everyone’s best interests at heart.
For starters, open adoption allows the most interaction and communication between you and your child’s adoptive parents. This can include, but is not limited to: video chats, phone calls and in-person visits. The frequency of this can be discussed after you’ve selected and met your child’s adoptive family and are getting to know them.
Open adoption will allow you to get to know your child as he or she grows up. As a birth mother, you will have the chance to answer questions that your child might have about their adoption in the future, like why did you give me up for adoption?
If having a relationship with your child and their adoptive parents is important to you, choosing open adoption may be the best option for you.
2. Semi-Open Adoption
The third and final type of adoption is called a semi-open adoption. This is an in-between of open and closed, and often referred to as either “the best of both worlds” or “a happy medium.” A semi-open adoption allows you to have limited contact with your child and their adoptive family. Communication is usually mediated through your adoption caseworker, our agency or a secure online portal we use called ChildConnect. This virtual program lets you and your child’s adoptive parents exchange letters, photos and updates without having to share personal information.
Semi adoption can still provide you, the birth mother, with access to details about your child’s well-being and let your child always get to know you as his or her birth parent from a safe distance. You are still able to select your child’s adoptive parents, if you want to, and form a bond with them and your child as well. If you want to know how your child is doing, but not be too involved, semi-open adoption allows you, the birth mother, to set the necessary boundaries to respect everyone’s privacy.
How to Choose Your Adoption Type as a Birth Mother
As a birth mother, choosing the right adoption type that fits the needs you have for you and your baby is a crucial step in your adoption journey. Making this decision involves thinking about what kind of relationship you want with your child and their adoptive parents. It’s important for you to know that there is no right or wrong type of adoption to choose. Your personal choice will reflect whatever is best for you and your child.
If you need any guidance, you can speak with an adoption professional at Adoption Choices of Missouri. Our adoption agency will go over the three types of adoption available to you and help you pick the right path for you as a birth mother.
Advice for Birth Mothers
Determining which adoption type is right for you is a unique experience for you and your child. You may have many questions about which adoption choice is right for you. With our adoption agency’s help, there are no questions that will go unanswered. As a birth mother, you will have the full support of your adoption caseworker and our agency. We will help you understand each type of adoption to ensure that you have a positive adoption experience.
Meet the Author: Samara Wiley is a published author of poetry, essays, and an environmental children’s storybook called, Waiting for the Water Fairy. She graduated from Benedictine University in 2018 with a double Bachelor of Arts in English Literature and French.She has been published in three small poetry anthologies one was called Talented.
Her other writing accomplishments include: winning a high school poetry competition and $2500 for her high school, having two out of her five novels be considered for publication and writing movie critic reviews for her university’s newsletter.
Although she has Cerebral Palsy and has had a turbulent childhood, Samara puts these small specs of herself into her writing to personally connect with her audience. She prides herself on pushing the boundaries in her writing and in her personal life with everything she does. Samara writes with her heart and a voice of compassion, and loves to pull from her top passions in life.
She currently lives in Yorkville, Illinois with her mom and two sisters.