Birth Mother Blog

Post-Placement Counseling and Birth Mother Support

The adoption process can be a longstanding process that takes excessive time and attention. As the birth mother, though you are putting your baby up for adoption, you might form a bond with your unborn child. As a mother, you are carrying your child for nine months, and during that time, you feel your baby kicking, moving, and more. At times you might speak to the baby, which doctors have claimed babies can hear even when in the womb. It is amazing, and over the course of the adoption, you might be questioning your decision to put your baby up for adoption. But, you know that you can’t provide your child with the life and luxury they deserve including you probably have little to no support. Even though you have a bond with your baby, you want not to be selfish and go along with the adoption instead of ending it.  That is noble, we at will say, as a private adoption agency, we want to be honest about the struggles you may endure due to such. While pregnant, we can provide you support if you choose to utilize our adoption services, but those around you should do the same. Including family, friends, and possibly a lover if you have one. To add on, you may suffer from mental strains due to your child’s adoption, and we definitely provide help for such. Our goal is to have your adoption go smoothly and you to be mentally healthy once your baby is no longer in your care. 

Why Do I Feel Depressed After My Baby is Now in the Custody of Their Adoptive Parents? 

We have witnessed this happen to multiple birth mothers that have put their babies up for adoption. You are not the only one and shouldn’t feel left out or like the only one. To explain what you are going through, it is called post-placement depression, which is when as a mother, you feel a sense of regret and low self-esteem due to putting your baby up for adoption. Now that the baby is no longer in your care, you feel like you gave up on your baby, and you feel extremely depressed. Adoption Choices of Missouri wants you to know that you did not give up on your baby at all. You provided them with a better life due to the circumstances of your own life. The baby wasn’t planned, and instead of seeking termination, which we would not judge you for, you decided to keep the child. Just know your baby is thriving and having a great life that you gave them and will embark on a great journey with the necessary resources!  As an adoption agency, we offer therapy with expenses covered in response to the mental health struggles. Know you can come to us at any point because we know such struggles can develop right after your child is within the custody of their adoptive parents. Or, it can be months or years later, and we will still be present. Never hesitate just because you feel embarrassed about struggling mentally. Many people misconstrue that pain can only be physical, but mental health is just as important and affects millions each year, including birth mothers.  

What Are Ways I Can Be Supported By My Family After My Adoption Process is Over? 

Families play a major role in the progression of someone’s mental state, so know when you are around them, make sure there is nothing but a positive aura around. But, there are multiple ways your family and friends can support you. 

  1. They can attend your therapy session with you to have an understanding of the way you feel more thoroughly. 
  2. During their free time as friends and family, they can regularly seek to talk to you and listen to your issues besides attending therapy sessions. 
  3. When present, they should reassure you that you did not give up on your baby just as much as we would do as your adoption agency. 
  4. They can understand the adoption process and its delicate nature by doing research of their own.  
  5. To add on, when you receive contact from your baby’s adoptive family, they can be present. Such a time can be sentimental and evolve in your emotions being affected again. Having someone there that you can lean on and speak to would be amazing. 

If You Are Seeking Post-Placement Counseling, We Are Here to Help  

As a licensed adoption agency in Missouri, we are here to assist you as a birth mother and build families. We understand that you might be hesitant due to the stigma surrounding the term adoption in general. But, we are trying to end that said stigma and show people adoption is a beautiful process. If you are adamant about putting your unborn baby up for adoption, you can contact us through a phone call, text, or message us through our portal. We will get back in contact with you as soon as possible with our 24 hours a day service and open seven days a week.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 816-527-9800


Meet the Author: Imani Agbionu is a recent graduate from George Mason University, earning her Bachelor of Science in Marketing. With a history in writing for her former university’s online publication, Her Campus, she aspires to become a successful journalist who can provide for herself and her family. She is from Washington, DC, where she has lived her whole life, but one day wants to move to experience and call another state home. Her mother is from Washington, DC, and her father is from Nigeria, part of the Igbo tribe. As an introvert, she loves streaming platforms, with her favorites being HBO Max, Netflix, and Disney+. Unfortunately, she can’t pick one due to all playing a vital role in her life on a daily basis. She enjoys reading, with her favorite book being The Shining by Stephen King, which she sees as unusual since she is a fearful person that avoids horror at all costs. Listening to music is a vital mechanism that helps her stay calm and deal with her anxiety at times. As an inspiring Journalist, she likes to write about a plethora of topics that some may look at as controversial, but she believes in staying true to herself. She doesn’t mind having conversations with people as long as opinions are being respected.