Birth Mother Blog Putting baby up for adoption

My Missouri Adoption Story

By Samantha Bradley

When I had an unplanned pregnancy at sixteen and didn’t want to become a parent so soon in life, I wasn’t sure what to do at first. I knew I wasn’t ready to raise a child when I myself was still technically a child. Luckily, after doing a quick internet search on adoption agencies in Missouri, I was able to find Adoption Choices of Missouri, a local child placing adoption agency. After reaching out to the adoption agency, they gave me the friendly support, comfort, and direction I needed to make the best decision for the health of my baby. The agency advocated for me in every part of the adoption process and assured me my rights, even as a teen birth mother.

Why I Choose Adoption in Missouri

The thought of placing my baby with an adoptive family scared me at first. Half of me wanted to keep the baby, and half of me knew I wasn’t ready to raise a baby financially, physically and emotionally. The love I had for my unborn baby took over. I knew I had to sacrifice raising my own child for her own sake. When I started my internet search, I looked up “adoption agencies near me”. I found a page about adoption in Missouri, which gave me the information I needed to feel more comfortable and guided in my adoption journey. I found and filled out the pregnant help form online. This made it easy to contact the agency, explain my situation, and start my adoption plan. 

Completing the Adoption Process

Although I knew I wanted to do an adoption, the process overwhelmed me at first. How would I know my baby was going to a good family? Would I be able to see my baby again when she’s older? So many questions raced through my mind with such a big decision to make. Once I started the adoption process, though, the adoption agency put my mind at ease.

After first contacting the adoption agency by completing the online help form, I was matched with a counselor who walked me through the adoption plan process. They explained that the agency offers financial and medical help as well as housing, all of which is offered for all eligible birth mothers. We looked through family profiles and eventually matched with a family I felt comfortable with. The counselor went over the birth plan that would happen at the hospital, and I felt reassured that there was a plan after I gave birth.

Placing with an Adoption Family

I sure wasn’t prepared for my unplanned pregnancy, but the right family out there was. Many mothers choose adoption in Missouri because so many families want to adopt a child. I found it easy to find a good family for my baby with the adoption agency. First, I explained to my counselor that I wanted a family with a similar background to mine.

I wanted a family from around the same area who shared values similar to mine. My counselor also told me about the different levels of openness with the adoptive family: open, closed, and semi-open. An open adoption is the most common type that entails staying in touch with the adoptive family during pregnancy, birth, and post-placement. With an open adoption, the adoptive family and I would share contact information and check in via email, phone calls, and in-person visits.

If I choose a closed adoption, I would have no contact with the adoptive parents and we would not know much about each other. A semi-open adoption is the middle road – I may meet the parents once before birth but not stay in touch after, or I could stay in touch after through a third party. I wouldn’t have direct communication with my child, although I’d get to know the adoptive parents beforehand.

Once we looked through a few family profiles, I chose a family and called them. Everything felt right during the phone call, so we decided to meet in person. I explained to them that I wanted a semi-open adoption to know what was happening in my child’s life while also giving them space with their adoption family. Talking with the family over the phone and then in person helped me feel secure and happy with where I was placing my baby. 

Receiving Post-Adoption Support

After my baby’s birth and adoption, I stayed in touch with the family as well as my counselor. My semi-open adoption allowed the adoption parents to give me updates on my child while still respecting each other’s privacy. I bonded with my child and the adoptive family from a distance, and I felt so happy to stay involved in my child’s life while being able to graduate high school and apply to colleges. Knowing that the agency mediated communication between me and the family and allowed me to keep talking with a post-placement counselor reassured me. I didn’t feel so alone in the adoption process, both before and after the adoption happened. Adoption Choices of Missouri was there with me every step of the process and gave me the care and support I needed.

If you are a birth mother considering adoption in Missouri, look no further than Adoption Choices for information and support. The adoption agency has several locations in Missouri and offers virtual help through online contact. Looking back on the adoption process years later, I know my life would be completely different had I not sought out the support of an adoption agency, and I also know that life of my baby is in good hands thanks to this agency. You don’t have to figure out your unplanned pregnancy on your own — Adoption Choices of Missouri can help.