Combatting 10 Common Misconceptions About Adoption in Missouri
Having accurate information about adoption is critical when considering adoption as a pregnancy option. While many view adoption in a positive light, there are still common misconceptions about adoption that can make some potential birth mothers and adoptive parents hesitant to pursue it. Misinformation can also result in birth mothers not properly tailoring their Missouri adoption plan to their needs, thus leading to problems later on. The reality of adoption is that it’s a wonderful choice for so many women and their babies, and it gives countless couples and individuals the opportunity to be parents. That’s why Adoption Choices of Missouri wants to clear up some of these common misconceptions about adoption that could be hindering you from considering it as a viable pregnancy option.
Common Misconceptions About Adoption in Missouri
- Giving Up Your Baby for Adoption in Missouri is Giving Up as a Parent
Choosing to place a baby for adoption is not a sign of failure as a birth mother. Rather, it’s a sign of being a resilient parent since adoption is not an easy choice to make. The fact that you are willing to commit to the adoption process and to a life without your child growing up at your side shows an incredible amount of strength and courage on your part.
- Choosing Adoption Is Selfish
Adoption is the very antithesis of selfishness. By choosing adoption in Missouri, you are offering your child a chance at a better life despite your parental instincts wanting you to keep your baby. Whenever you place anyone’s best interests above your own, you are anything but selfish.
- Birth Mothers in Missouri Are Mainly Teen Moms
While many teen moms seek out help during their teen pregnancy in the form of adoption, the reality is that women of various childbearing ages experience an unplanned pregnancy and pursue adoption. A woman in her 20s might pursue adoption if she has a career and financial goals she wants to meet before starting a family. Women in their 30s and 40s might already have families, and having another child might introduce additional strain, especially if the family is already facing economic hardships.
- A Child is Better Off with Their Birth Parents
Birth parents are not inherently better than adoptive parents. A child is better off with a couple or individual who can provide him or her with support, love, and stability. A biological relationship is not a prerequisite for these critical components of a healthy upbringing.
- LBGTQ+ or Transracial Adoptions in Missouri Are Too Complicated
While some people don’t support LGBTQ+ or transracial adoption due to outdated beliefs, others may be hesitant to pursue or support such adoptions due to concerns that the child might face hardships. It’s important to acknowledge that a child raised by LGBTQ+ parents or parents of a different race may encounter insensitive comments and looks or even discrimination from time to time. However, as society increasingly embraces diverse families, these concerns will likely diminish over time. Additionally, LGBTQ+ and transracial families are no less stable and loving than more traditional families.
- Single People Are Unsuitable to Become Adoptive Parents
It’s perfectly valid for a birth mother to want her child to grow up in a household headed by two parents. However, there are so many wonderful unpartnered individuals who are ready and able to be amazing parents. While single parenthood can provide unique challenges in raising children, many succeed in bringing up children to be well-adjusted and ready to face the world when they grow up.
- Putting Up Your Baby for Adoption Leads to Regret
Women who place their babies for adoption may experience periods of doubt about their decision. This is completely natural, but it doesn’t mean that they regret their decision. Often, they choose adoption after carefully weighing all the pros and cons of adoption and comparing them to other options such as parenting or termination. When they decide to pursue adoption, they are in complete control of the Missouri adoption process to ensure they are maximally confident in their decision, so they are less likely to feel regret.
- Birth Mothers Never See Their Children Again after Adoption in Missouri
One of the great things about adoption is that there is no singular type of adoption. In decades past, it was the norm for mother and child to be permanently separated once the child was born, with little chance of reunification. However, most modern adoptions entail some level of openness. This allows birth mothers to stay in touch with their birth children and develop a relationship with them.
- Openness in Adoption Violates Boundaries
While some people inaccurately believe that adoption leads to a permanent separation between mother and child, others assume that any contact between a birth mother and her child leads to confusion for the child and undermines the adoptive parents. Many adoptees are curious about their birth parents and may want to meet them someday. However, they understand that their adoptive parents are solely responsible for them and therefore have full authority over them. Additionally, adoptive parents and birth mothers agree on the role that the birth mother will play in the child’s life before the adoption is finalized to ensure everyone’s best interests are met.
- Birth Mothers Can Take Back Their Children in Missouri Adoptions
A birth mother reserves the right to change her mind about pursuing adoption up until the moment she signs over her parental rights to the adoptive parents. Once she relinquishes these rights, she can’t take back her child. Therefore, adoptive parents should not worry about losing their child after the adoption is finalized.
How Can I Further Educate Myself on the Facts about Adoption in Missouri?
The better informed you are about adoption, the more content you will be with your decision. Internalizing any misinformation about adoption can result in you not getting the most out of your experience or even avoiding it as a viable pregnancy option altogether, even if it’s the right choice for you and your baby. The earlier you can get all the facts you need to make an informed decision, the sooner you can successfully navigate the adoption process. That’s why you should reach out to Adoption Choices of Missouri today, so we can answer all your adoption questions and set you on the path that’s right for you. Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800
Meet the Author: Mary DeStefano is an Ohio native currently living in northern Virginia and works in the litigation consulting industry where she has experience in antitrust, product liability, and mass torts matters. She holds a B.A. in Economics (‘15) and an M.A. in Applied Economics (‘16) from the University of Cincinnati.
Mary is passionate about empowering and supporting those involved in the adoption and surrogacy processes. She finds great meaning in wielding the written word to develop impactful narratives and to help people stay informed. In her spare time, Mary can be found beachcombing and going on other adventures with her dog along the shores of the Chesapeake Bay. She also has an affinity for antiquing and loves a good 80’s movie marathon.