Birth Mother

The 6 Top Resources Adoption Agencies in Missouri Can Offer Birth Mothers

The 6 Top Resources Adoption Agencies in Missouri Can Offer Birth Mothers

Whether you are a pregnant woman who is considering adoption or a new birth mother and going through one of the many life challenges, we at Adoption Choices of Missouri are here to guide you through your adoption journey and help ease you through these tough moments. Our agency has listed the six adoption resources available for you as a birth mother. If you ever need assistance, know that you will have our utmost care and support.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Finding Yourself Unexpectedly Unemployed

As a birth mother who might find herself unexpectedly unemployed during her pre-placement or post-placement in her adoption journey. Know that our agency can offer you housing assistance in paying rent, which will be a stepping stone to help you and your baby get the essentials you need as you go along on your adoption journey. Now, you might find small jobs that can help get you started on your journey to provide for yourself. Getting back on your feet probably won’t be easy, but know that we will check in every step of the way to help guide you to the right resources that will help you get stable financially during your post-placement. As a birth mother, you deserve the right to be happy and take care of yourself.

Help For Birth Mothers Who Find Themselves Homeless

As a birth mother, if you ever find yourself homeless, we will provide you with all the essentials you need, like shelter, food, groceries, maternity clothing, and other essentials, to help you with your pregnancy post-placement. To be able to thrive during your adoption process. Having a warm, safe place while you go through your adoption process is important to have a healthy environment for your child to visit and call a second home.

Mental Health is Nothing To Be Ashamed Of

If you are a birth mother going through any mental health struggles, know that this is perfectly okay. Dealing with mental health is not something to be ashamed of, like the emotional struggles that might come along on your adoption journey, don’t worry; you are not alone. Our agency, Adoption Choices of Missouri, has counseling and support group resources available to you.
Having the courage to seek professional help might help you understand your emotions, not just with your adoption but with emotions surrounding other circumstances in your life. Now your adoption counselor will be there to support you every step of the way and make sure you feel safe in our nonjudgmental space that allows you as a birth mother to have a voice. No matter what mental health disorder you suffer from, know that you, as a birth mother, still matter and are still important.

Struggling to Find Resources Because of Language Barriers or Financial Struggles

As an immigrant birth mother, you might struggle to find resources because of a language barrier or financial struggles, but this does not mean you are alone. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we will take the time to help you find the resources you need during your adoption process, which includes everything you and your baby might need. Our agency might be able to translate important documents, answer questions and concerns, and provide you with the care and support you need to not feel so alone as a non-English speaking birth mother. Just because you may not be fluent in English does not mean you don’t deserve the care you earn as a birth mother.

I Am an LGBTQ+ Birth Mother, Will They Still Accept My Child?

As an LGBTQ+ birth mother, you might be wondering, will the adoptive parents I choose for my child be comfortable with me as a gay or lesbian birth mother? Will they still accept my child as their own? Questions like these are perfectly okay to wonder as you begin your adoption journey as an LGBTQ+ birth mother. However, know that we accept all birth mothers from every walks of life at our agency. We will always keep our doors open, have transparent communication, and show you the kindness, care, and support you might need. No matter what circumstance you have been through, we will work with you to have the positive adoption experience you deserve.

Teenage Pregnancy

Being a teenager is hard enough, but having to go through teenage pregnancy is not something anyone is prepared for. As a birth mother, you may feel like you have no support, that you are making this decision all alone. However, that is far from the truth; at our agency, we are here to guide you, provide support and resources to help you through this challenging but rewarding decision, as you are just beginning your life and might not be ready for motherhood. Now, as a young birth mother, you might have lots of questions from your birth child later in your life. However, you might also be able to complete your life goals, like attending college, becoming a mother later in life, or having a successful job. No matter what path you choose after your adoption and years down the road, know that we will not judge you and that you did your best as a mother. As you and your child grow separately, know that your choice of adoption is the right decision for you and your baby, and that age does not matter, you as a birth mother, will forever hold your birth child in your heart.

Advice to Birth Mothers

As a birth mother, there are many circumstances that you may find yourself in, but you don’t ever have to feel like you are alone or like no one will support you. Adoption Choices of Missouri will support you and find the resources that you need. Being a birth mother might not be an easy route to take, but the things you gain as a mother are the most important thing. You gain the support, advice, care, communication, and love to know that wherever you came from, you are an important piece in your child’s life. Your decision to choose adoption despite your circumstances was the best decision for you and your birth child.

 

Meet the Author: Samara Wiley is a published author of poetry, essays, and an environmental children’s storybook called, Waiting for the Water Fairy. She graduated from Benedictine University in 2018 with a double Bachelor of Arts in English Literature and French. She has been published in three small poetry anthologies one was called Talented.

Her other writing accomplishments include: winning a high school poetry competition and $2500 for her high school, having two out of her five novels be considered for publication, and writing movie critic reviews for her university’s newsletter.

Although she has Cerebral Palsy and has had a turbulent childhood, Samara puts these small specs of herself into her writing to personally connect with her audience. She prides herself on pushing the boundaries in her writing and in her personal life with everything she does. Samara writes with her heart and a voice of compassion and loves to pull from her top passions in life.

She currently lives in Yorkville, Illinois with her mom and two sisters.

Birth Mother

The Top 4 Self-Care Tips for Birth Mothers Considering Adoption During the Month of May

The Top 4 Self-Care Tips for Birth Mothers Considering Adoption During the Month of May

In May, there can be a lot of hype and pressure around Mother’s Day to make everything perfect. More often than not, it ends up being a very emotional and stressful day for many families. But it can be especially devastating to a birth mother who has recently placed her baby for adoption or to a birth mother whose due date is still looming.

But the good news is that you actually have your very own special day dedicated just for you! While you won’t see it advertised as heavily and you won’t see as many cards for it as Mother’s Day, the day before Mother’s Day is actually Birth Mother’s Day. If you have chosen an open adoption, then you will be glad to hear that most adoptive families make it a point for the child to spend time with their birth mother on Birth Mother’s Day.

At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we understand that this may still be a very difficult time for you as a birth mother. Despite your adoptive family’s best efforts to include you, you will probably still find yourself reflecting on your loss of parenthood. That is why we have put together this guide to self-care tips for Missouri birth mothers navigating adoption during the month of May. Treat yourself to some of the well-deserved R&R and TLC you earned.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

The Top 4 Self-Care Tips for Missouri Birth Mothers to Relax from Mother’s Day Stress During the Month of May

  1. Take care of your body as a birth mother. You’ve heard it before, and I’m here to say it again: Hydrate! Eat healthily! Did you know that natural foods like bananas can improve your mental health by boosting serotonin? Treat yourself to a mani-pedi while you can’t quite reach those toes! But self-care isn’t just all fun spa days (although you should definitely be pampering yourself while you’re at it.) Sometimes self-care means doing the things you don’t want to do for the sake of your health and the health of your baby, like adding some extra light exercising to your routine. Not only will adding in small things like going for an extra walk help you to lose some of that unwanted pregnancy weight, but studies show that exercise also has many positive mental health benefits.
  2. Get outside and enjoy that beautiful May weather! Now is your chance to enjoy some nature before summer comes along and brings its sweltering heat. The sunshine provides plenty of Vitamin D, which works wonders for both your physical and mental health and being in nature surrounded by green spaces is directly related to positive mental health. Studies show that people who spend at least two hours a week in nature tend to be happier and report higher levels of health and well-being than people who did not spend as much time in the great outdoors.
  3. Reach out to your birth mother support networks. With vaccines rolling out, the weather warming up, and COVID-19 rates lowering while restrictions begin laxing, now is a great time to turn to your own family for some support and quality time. But if you don’t get along with your family or feel that you can’t turn to them, there are plenty of other types of support networks out there for birth mothers. You can find help and support in the form of blogs, message boards, discussion groups, or online forums. Attending a birth mother support group — in person or virtually — is also highly recommended. Shared experiences with other birth mothers can really help you feel like you are not alone on your adoption journey while giving you a greater sense of community.
  4. Make sure that you take care of your mental health as a birth mother. While most of the tips listed here do include a way to give your mood an upwards boost, it’s still important to talk to a licensed professional about any mental or emotional grief or anguish you may be experiencing. Our adoption agency is a full-service, licensed adoption agency. This means that mental health counseling and emotional support for birth mothers is just one of the many services we offer to help you navigate the adoption process and post-placement.

You Do Not Have to Deal with Your Unplanned Pregnancy Alone: Call Our Missouri Adoption Agency Today for Help Placing Your Baby for Adoption

April showers bring May flowers, but you weren’t quite expecting this pilgrim. That is exactly why Adoption Choices of Missouri is here to help you navigate your unplanned pregnancy. Our full-service, licensed adoption agency is here to help you throughout the entire adoption process. Our birth mothers are so important to us that we even offer post-placement services to help you readjust after the adoption process is completed. Please contact our adoption agency today so that we can get started helping you with your unplanned pregnancy and making your adoption plan as soon as possible.

Meet the Author: Kelly Felix is a graduate from the University of New Orleans. She holds a BA in English as well as a BA in Sociology. Her English concentration is in journalism, and her specialties in sociology are gender studies and environmental sociology.

When she isn’t voraciously guzzling coffee or devouring books, Kelly can be found either bent over a canvas working on her art or at her computer playing video games. She has hands-on classroom teaching experience from her time working as a substitute teacher for Kelly Services. Kelly also completed an in-house editorial internship at Pelican Publishing Company, and she finished the goal internship program at Green Light New Orleans. Kelly generally exists in a state of suspended disbelief, but when she’s not there she resides in New Orleans.

Birth Mother Blog

Open Adoption: What it is and Why It’s the Preferred Adoption Option in Missouri

Open Adoption: What it is and Why It’s the Preferred Adoption Option in Missouri

Are you a birth mother in Missouri who is considering an open adoption? If so, you might have some questions about putting your baby up for adoption. The good news is that at Adoption Choices of Missouri, we have answers.

Adoption has evolved with the times. While many people still think of a closed adoption as the most common choice, that isn’t actually the case. Birth mothers choose different types of adoption based on their personal needs, but open adoptions have become more common.

Open Adoption: what It is and Why It’s the Preferred Option

  • What is Open Adoption?

Open adoption refers to an adoption in which all parties maintain communication. This means that you will stay in contact with your birth child and his or her adoptive family pre, during and post-placement. As opposed to a closed adoption, both you and the adoptive family will share identifying information in an open adoption.

In an open adoption, you’ll have the opportunity to meet with your birth child in person. This can help establish a strong bond and grow your relationship. If both you and your child’s adoptive family agree, these meetings can include grandparents and extended family members as well.

In an open adoption, you will get to choose your child’s adoptive family. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, you’ll have the chance to look through our potential adoptive family portfolios. These contain information about each family for you to review. You can select a family that feels like a good match and your adoption caseworker will facilitate a phone call and an in-person meeting.

  • What Does Communication Look Like in an Open Adoption?

Because each adoption is as unique as each birth mother, communication in an open adoption will look different for everyone. However, there are a few common factors you can expect. For example, you might communicate through direct emails or letters, as well as meet in person.

If you choose an open adoption, you will need to establish boundaries with your child’s adoptive family. By doing so, you can make sure that all parties are in agreement about what type of communication is acceptable. Your adoption caseworker can help facilitate this discussion. It is helpful to remember that the best agreements are the ones that are best for your child.

  • Why is Open Adoption the Preferred Option?

Open adoption has become the preferred option for many reasons, one being that it anticipates the needs of your child. It is common for adopted children to develop questions about their birth mothers as they grow older. In an open adoption, you will remain a part of their lives from the beginning. This can help your child as they navigate the challenges of discovering and forming their own identity.

Another reason that open adoption is often preferred is because it can lessen any negative stigmas around adoption. Because information is readily available, questions can be answered as soon as they are asked. Keeping something private can sometimes lead to the misconception that it is shameful or embarrassing. Rather, adoption is a process that is many things—joyful, complicated, emotional—but never something to be ashamed of.

Is an Open Adoption Right for You?

Now that you have more information around open adoption, what it is and why it’s the preferred choice, you might be ready to select the type of adoption you’d prefer.

Only you can decide if an open adoption is the right choice for you. Because you are an expert on your own needs and situation, the final choice ultimately has to come from you. However, that doesn’t mean you can’t ask for some support! At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we provide you with an adoption caseworker who can help you walk through the benefits and drawbacks of an open adoption.

Additionally, if you have supportive friends and family in your life, you can always turn to them for advice. Be sure to listen to your heart when making this choice. At the end of the day, the best decision is the one that will benefit you and your baby.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Molly Doyle is a native San Franciscan, Molly is an experienced educator and a dedicated writer. She holds her multiple subject teaching credential as well as her Masters of Arts in Teaching. When not teaching children or creating new written pieces, Molly can be found kicking around a soccer ball, going for urban hikes or whipping up a fruit pie. 

She currently lives in Seattle, her first home outside of California. 

 

 

 

 

 

Birth Mother Blog

6 Different Types of Adoption Families: What You Should Know as a Birth Mother

6 Different Types of Adoption Families: What You Should Know as a Birth Mother

Selecting your unborn child’s adoptive parents is a decision that takes time and patience as you sort through the adoptive parent profiles; this is an essential part of the adoption process in the State of Missouri.

When thinking about your child’s adoptive parents, you may be wondering what type of adoptive family will fit you and your baby’s wants and needs, like if you prefer a two-parent household or would consider a one-parent household. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we are here to guide you through your adoption journey, as we have listed the six types of adoptive families you may want to consider for your birth child.

 The Types of Missouri Adoptive Families

  1. Younger

Having young adoptive parents raise your child does not mean young parents might be immature or make them any less of parents. It simply means that they may provide a different perspective to parenting your child. For example, how they parent your child may look somewhat different than you would expect, but they may run into obstacles with the adoptive parents still being young and wanting to explore the outside world more than older adults. This example may cause uncertainty in your decision to select younger adoptive parents because this requires unknown individuals to care for your child in the absence of the adoptive parents.

  1. Older

Picking older adoptive parents for your birth child means that they may parent your child in the traditional ways of parenthood. Having older/mature parents raise your child may help guide and advise them as they grow up. Older parents may seem like they won’t embrace the new teachings of parenting. However, this may not be the case as older adoptive parents can still adapt to the different parenting styles and still teach your child important life lessons.

  1. Traditional

As a birth mother, you may have envisioned your child having a traditional family, mother, and father, which is perfectly okay. Having two parents with different parenting styles working as a team may be a top priority in your adoption plan. Having two parents raise your child means your child might get to have two loving parents who will guide and support them as they grow up. Living in a two-parent home might ensure that your child’s wants and needs will be fulfilled. Your birth child will gain two loving parents that will teach them good communication, a foundation in teamwork, and love.

4. LGBTQ

Choosing a same-sex couple as adoptive parents for your birth child might teach your child open communication, understanding, and the meaning of love. An LGBT adoption might help your child grow as they embrace their identity as they grow up, gain confidence, and teach them how to accept others that may be different from them. Furthermore, LGBT parents will constantly be open and transparent with the child, as they understand the challenges that your child may face in life.

5. Single

Choosing a single adoptive parent as your birth child’s parent does not mean your child will be loved any less, just because your adoptive parent chooses to parent alone. Choosing a single adoptive parent to raise your child might provide your child with the same love, care and support that having two parents would. Having a single parent might also teach your birth child how to be independent and that things may not always go as planned but that things will turn out okay. As a birth mother, consider choosing a single adoptive parent to give your child the love and care they deserve.

6. Transracial

Transracial adoption is choosing your child’s adoptive parents based on love, not skin color. Now, if certain values like culture or heritage matter to you, then maybe transracial adoption may not be a good fit for you. However, choosing a transracial adoption gives your birth child a sense of learning and growing not only about their birth culture but also about allowing their adoptive parents to teach them the unique traditions of their adoptive family. Having your birth child grow up in a transracial household may benefit them greatly as they grow to understand diversity and their place in the world.

Advice for you as a Missouri Birth Mother

Choosing your child’s adoptive parents is such an important part of your adoption process. With the help of our agency, Adoption Choices of Missouri, Your birth child

will gain a family full of love, support, and a chance at happiness. Choosing your birth child’s parents might provide you, the birth mother, with a sense of relief as you realize the importance of the values you want to instill in your child’s future. Your child’s adoptive parents will help your child grow and provide your child with a unique and happy family unit full of love.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Samara Wiley is a published author of poetry, essays, and an environmental children’s storybook called, Waiting for the Water Fairy. She graduated from Benedictine University in 2018 with a double Bachelor of Arts in English Literature and French.She has been published in three small poetry anthologies one was called Talented.

Her other writing accomplishments include: winning a high school poetry competition and $2500 for her high school, having two out of her five novels be considered for publication and writing movie critic reviews for her university’s newsletter.

Although she has Cerebral Palsy and has had a turbulent childhood, Samara puts these small specs of herself into her writing to personally connect with her audience. She prides herself on pushing the boundaries in her writing and in her personal life with everything she does. Samara writes with her heart and a voice of compassion, and loves to pull from her top passions in life.

She currently lives in Yorkville, Illinois with her mom and two sisters.

Birth Mother Blog

The Pros and Cons of Open Adoption for Birth Mothers in Missouri

The Pros and Cons of Open Adoption for Birth Mothers in Missouri

Are you a birth mother who has chosen adoption but is having trouble deciding which type of adoption is right for you? After all, what exactly is an open adoption? What are the benefits of an open adoption? What other types of adoption are available to you? You may be feeling a bit overwhelmed with similar questions and more. It’s OK. Take a deep breath, slowly breathing in and out. Relax. Adoption Choices of Missouriis here to help answer all of your adoption questions. Whichever type of adoption you choose, we are here to help you every step of the way.

The Three Different Types of Adoption Available When You Place Your Baby for Adoption Through an Adoption Agency in Missouri

There are three types of adoption: open, closed, and semi-open adoption. A closed adoption is when there is no identifying information left behind by the birth mother or the adoptive family. The birth mother and adoptive family do not stay in touch and have no way of contacting each other.

A semi-open adoption falls somewhere between the other two options by limiting contact to written communication. These letters or emails are usually shared indirectly through some sort of third party.

An open adoption is when the birth mother and adoptive family share identifying contact information. Both parties agree on a set of rules or guidelines in order to stay in touch directly, via in-person visits, phone calls, texts, and e-mails. Our adoption agency strongly encourages open adoption because we believe that it keeps everyone’s best interests at heart.

The Pros of Open Adoption for Birth Mothers in Missouri

  1. Maintain a healthy relationship with your baby and the adoptive family. In an open adoption, you won’t have to worry and wonder from afar whether or not your baby and the adoptive family are OK, because you’ll be able to simply ask them how they are doing. You will be able to watch your child grow up throughout the years. You will get to see and know the kind of person your baby grows up to be.
  2. Answer questions your child may have about why they were placed for adoption. Your child will not have to grow up without understanding why you placed them for adoption. You will be able to explain to them why you had to make this caring and selfless decision for their benefit and why it was the best option for everyone involved. You will have the opportunity to explain to them how hard this was for you and how you felt the need to give them a chance at a better life through adoption.
  3. You are in control of your open adoption. As the birth mother, you are the one who establishes the ground rules. You are the one who chooses to place your baby for adoption, you get to set the criteria and pick the adoptive family, and you get to set the visitation guidelines. You have the final say on what you are willing to compromise on and what is non-negotiable.
  4. A licensed adoption agency means that your baby will be going to a safe and loving home, no matter what. Our full-service, licensed adoption agency provides pre-screened and qualified families for your open adoption. All of the adoptive families shown in our family portfolios have undergone a rigorous home study before being approved. This means that you will be placing your baby in a loving and nurturing home, no matter which family you pick.

The Cons of Open Adoption for Birth Mothers in Missouri

  1. There may be a confusion of parental roles. When you place your baby for adoption, you waive your parental rights. This means that you will not have the final say if you disagree with the adoptive family’s decisions or parenting styles.
  2. There is less of the closure and privacy that come with a closed or semi-open adoption. Open adoption is not right for everyone. For some birth mothers, it is too much of a painful reminder. For others, it does not offer the discretion they seek. If you are looking for closure or anonymity, then a closed or semi-open adoption may be a better suit for you.
  3. It will not always be possible to stay in touch or visit with your baby and the adoptive family. It is always important to be realistic and manage expectations when it comes to adoption. Your baby and their adoptive family may simply be too busy with their own lives to see you for every holiday and family reunion. Although you will get to see them throughout the years, it will not always be possible to plan a visit or keep in contact as much as you would like.

Is Open Adoption Right for You? Call Our Missouri Adoption Agency Today to Find Unplanned Pregnancy Help 

An unplanned pregnancy can feel very stressful and overwhelming, but choosing a type of adoption and making your adoption plan does not have to be. Our agency’s adoption specialists are ready and waiting to help you place your baby for adoption. Your adoption caseworker will help you weigh all of your adoption options and work to ensure that you pick the best type of adoption to suit your needs. The sooner you contact our adoption agency, the sooner we can get started helping you with your adoption process.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Kelly Felix is a graduate from the University of New Orleans. She holds a BA in English as well as a BA in Sociology. Her English concentration is in journalism, and her specialties in sociology are gender studies and environmental sociology.

When she isn’t voraciously guzzling coffee or devouring books, Kelly can be found either bent over a canvas working on her art or at her computer playing video games. She has hands-on classroom teaching experience from her time working as a substitute teacher for Kelly Services. Kelly also completed an in-house editorial internship at Pelican Publishing Company, and she finished the goal internship program at Green Light New Orleans. Kelly generally exists in a state of suspended disbelief, but when she’s not there she resides in New Orleans.

Birth Mother Blog

5 Benefits of Open Adoption in Missouri

5 Benefits of Open Adoption in Missouri

If you are facing an unplanned pregnancy in Missouri, you might be searching for options. The good news is that you have choices! At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we offer three different types of adoption: closed, semi-open and open adoption.

Each of these types of adoption has its own set of benefits and drawbacks. The right choice for you will depend on a number of personal factors. You will need to take into account your situation, your preferences and your needs. If you are considering an open adoption, it can be helpful to know some details. Fortunately, there are manybenefits of an open adoption. 

1. You Can Choose Your Child’s Adoptive Family

It is natural to want your child to be placed with an adoptive family that will love and care for them. At our Missouri adoption center, we have an extensive list of potential adoptive family portfolios for you to browse. These portfolios include information about each family and their background, beliefs and values. While you look for a good match for your child, you can keep in mind any specific areas that you’d like your child’s adoptive family to share.

You will not embark upon this portion of your adoption journey alone. Your adoption specialist will be there to answer questions and offer support. Once you select a family that you are interested in, your adoption specialist will help you set up a phone call. From there, you’ll have the option to meet the potential adoptive family in person. If you change your mind at any point during this process, you always have the freedom to move in a different direction. 

2. You Can Build a Relationship With Your Birth Child

One of the wonderful things about an open adoption is that you can build a relationship with your birth child. You will have the opportunity to communicate with them through several different methods, including photos, letters, emails and meet ups.

It is important to come to an agreement with your child’s adoptive family ahead of time concerning any communication details. If everyone is on the same page, you can all avoid crossing any boundaries by mistake. You will want to cover topics like how often you will communicate with your birth child, what that will look like and if any other family members will be involved (i.e. relatives, siblings, etc.).

3. You Can Build a Relationship with Your Child’s Adoptive Family

In addition to building a relationship with your birth child, you can also build one with his or her adoptive family. This will depend on what you and your child’s adoptive family agree upon, but it is possible to establish a strong bond. You might stay connected through phone calls or emails. If you’d like, you can meet in person and spend time with your birth child together. Whatever feels right to you both is the best way to go.

4. Your Birth Child Can Ask Questions About Their Adoption

As your birth child grows older, they will likely develop questions surrounding their identity and background. This includes questions about their adoption and you, their birth mother. If you are able to maintain and build a relationship with them from birth, it is easier to answer these questions as they arise. Your child will grow up knowing the details of his or her adoption and, most importantly, that they have been loved their whole life.

5. You Have the Comfort of Knowing How Your Child is Doing

Because you will have a relationship with your birth child in an open adoption, you can stay informed about what’s going on in their life. This includes big life events, like weddings and graduations, as well as smaller dailly moments. The amount that your child chooses to share will vary between families, as well as with any agreements you come to with your child’s adoptive family.

Having a connection to your child can help alleviate any worries or anxieties related to their wellbeing. If you are still experiencing those feelings, it can help to speak to a professional. Adoption Choices of Missourioffers access to counseling service during your pregnancy and post-placement as well.

Is an Open Adoption Right for Me?

Now that you are more familiar with some of the benefits of open adoption and types of adoption, you can begin to consider if this is the right option for you. Be sure to listen to your heart and reach for support when you need it. Our adoption agency in Missouri has plenty of help to offer and we are happy to answer any questions that you might have. We want you to feel confident and secure in any choice that you make.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Molly Doyle is a native San Franciscan, Molly is an experienced educator and a dedicated writer. She holds her multiple subject teaching credential as well as her Masters of Arts in Teaching. When not teaching children or creating new written pieces, Molly can be found kicking around a soccer ball, going for urban hikes or whipping up a fruit pie. 

She currently lives in Seattle, her first home outside of California. 

Birth Mother Blog

4 Ways to Communicate in an Open Adoption in Missouri

4 Ways to Communicate in an Open Adoption in Missouri

Open and respectful communication is one of the best ways to build a solid relationship with someone. If you are a birth mother in Missouri who has chosen an open adoption, finding healthy ways to communicate will be crucial. Not only will you remain in contact with your birth child, you’ll also have an ongoing relationship with his or her adoptive family.

At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we have plenty of support available for you as you navigate the waters of your open adoption. Your adoption caseworker can answer any questions you have about the different ways that an open adoption can look. Your adoption journey will be unique to you, but there are a few common ways to communicate in an open adoption.

  • Phone Calls with Your Birth Child and His or Her Adoptive Family 

One simple way to communicate with your birth child and his or her adoptive family is through phone calls. These can be quick check-ins to see how things are going or longer phone calls that cover the bigger events in your birth child’s life. Both types of calls can be helpful ways to communicate.

When might you give your birth child or his or her adoptive family a call? Again, this depends on any prior agreements that you’ve made with your birth child’s adoptive family. Maybe you’ve decided on a certain day to hold a weekly check-in. Perhaps you’ve all decided that it’s okay to call regardless of the day or time. Maybe you’d like to speak on the phone before or after big life events, like a graduation or a wedding. These phone calls can look many different ways. The important thing is that you maintain positivity and respect the boundaries you’ve discussed with your birth child’s adoptive family.

  • Visit Your Birth Child In Person

Another way that you can keep up communication with your birth child is through in-person visits. With an in-person visit, you’ll be able to catch up with your birth child and get to know them through conversation. You might plan an activity that the two of you can do together, like going to the park or taking a painting class, or you can choose to keep it less structured.

Keeping in touch in this way allows you to watch your birth child grow up. You’ll be able to see them develop from a small child to an accomplished adult. If you and your birth child’s adoptive family have discussed this, you can also visit their house for dinner or other events. In this way, you are able to connect with both your birth child and his or her adoptive family at the same time.

  • Write Letters to Your Birth Child

Sometimes it can be hard to say all the things that we want to in person. Something comes up and we forget, or it feels a little bit too awkward to express a bigger emotion. Writing a letter is a great way to ensure that you communicate everything you were hoping to with precision.

If you’re not sure what to include in a letter, take a minute to jot down a list of possible ideas. Is there anything in particular that you really want your birth child to know about you or your family? This is the perfect opportunity to teach them. You can include information about your childhood, rituals or beliefs that are valuable to you and details about the things you love.

It is also a wonderful place to express your feelings for your birth child and let them know that they are cared for deeply. Do keep in mind, however, that it is not appropriate to share anything that would violate your agreement with your birth child’s adoptive family or go against any beliefs that they are sharing with them.

  • Follow Your Birth Child and/or His or Her Adoptive Family on Social Media

The world can feel very small and interconnected these days, thanks to social media. An easy way to keep up with your birth child and their adoptive family is by following them on social media. Make sure you discuss this beforehand with the adoptive family.

You can comment on posts and keep up with life events through pictures and captions. It also allows you a quick avenue to let your birth child know that you are proud of them. Sometimes, communicating big feelings in a smaller way can be a great reminder of how much you care.

Consider an Open Adoption in Missouri Today

There are so many ways to communicate in an open adoption. Make sure that you discuss your preferred methods of communication with your birth child’s adoptive family before you commit to any. From there, you can outline a plan with them to ensure that there are no surprises along the way.

At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we understand that it can be hard to come up with a communication plan. Our staff is here to help should you need it. Our goal is for your open adoption to be joyful and filled with love.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Molly Doyle is a native San Franciscan, Molly is an experienced educator and a dedicated writer. She holds her multiple subject teaching credential as well as her Masters of Arts in Teaching. When not teaching children or creating new written pieces, Molly can be found kicking around a soccer ball, going for urban hikes or whipping up a fruit pie.

She currently lives in Seattle, her first home outside of California.

Birth Mother Blog

The Pros and Cons of Semi-Open Adoption for Pregnant Women in Missouri

The Pros and Cons of Semi-Open Adoption for Pregnant Women in Missouri

Most of us are at least somewhat familiar with the story of Goldilocks and the three bears. As Goldilocks wanders the bears’ house, she finds some items that are too much for her and some that are not enough. This is too big, that is too small, she says. This is too hot, that is too cold. But then, she always finds a third choice that falls perfectly between the two other options, and it is just right.

For many expectant mothers, semi-open adoption is that happy medium that is just right. It is the perfect mix of what they like best about open and closed adoptions. But what are the differences between each type of adoption? Is semi-open adoption even right for you? Adoption Choices of Missouri is here to help you find out which type of adoption is the best one for you when making your adoption plan.

The Three Main Types of Adoption Options Available in Missouri

There are three types of adoption: open, closed, and semi-open. An open adoption is when the birth mother and adoptive family have an open relationship that follows an established set of agreed-upon guidelines. Open adoption means staying in touch directly through in-person visits and planned meetings. A closed adoption is when the birth mother leaves no identifying information and has absolutely no contact with the baby or the adoptive family once the adoption process is completed. A semi-open adoption falls somewhere in the middle between the two.

Semi-open adoption usually consists of leaving behind some contact information with a mediator and staying in touch indirectly. The birth mother’s dialogue with the baby and the adoptive family is through nonverbal, written forms of communication in semi-open adoption. This usually means corresponding through e-mails, photos, or letters.

There is usually some sort of third-party mediator who oversees and directs these exchanges. At our adoption agency, we use a secure and confidential online portal called ChildConnect. ChildConnect allows you to communicate with your adoptive parents and receive updates about your child from a safe and protected distance.

The Pros of Semi-Open Adoption in Missouri

  1. The best of both worlds. Maybe open adoption seems intimidating to you, but closed adoption seems too final. Semi-open adoption is a nice middle ground that offers the best aspects of each. You won’t have the familial commitments or obligations of open adoption, but you will still be able to know a bit about your baby as he or she grows up. You will still have a sense of the privacy and anonymity that a closed adoption offers, but get a chance to explain a bit about yourself and why you chose to place your baby for adoption through an introductory letter.
  2. You are in control. Birth mothers are always in control over how much involvement they feel comfortable with, but a semi-open adoption allows for a little more control when setting the ground rules of how much contact is or is not okay. You can decide how much of your information is shared and how much you’d like to say about yourself in your letters or emails. Written communication allows you to take the time to make sure you say everything you want to say, but only what you want to say. You can decide how much of yourself you would or wouldn’t like to disclose.
  3. Less guilt or grief. There is almost always a sense of regret and sadness over the loss of parenthood that comes with adoption. It is perfectly natural to feel remorse after such a huge and life-changing decision. That is why our adoption agency offers mental health and support counseling for birth mothers. But semi-open adoption can help to soften that blow. You can avoid the painful reminders that come with seeing your baby face-to-face in an open adoption, but you can still have peace of mind knowing that your baby will grow up able to find the answers to any adoption questions they may have.

The Cons of Semi-Open Adoption in Missouri

  1. You have to be realistic and manage expectations when it comes to adoption. Let’s face it, life happens. People grow and get wrapped up in their lives and don’t always get around to writing back, even if they have the best intentions of doing so. There is always a chance that you may lose touch with your adoptive family and your child over the years. These things happen, but try to not take it personally and understand that it is because they are busy with their own lives.
  2. You may not have complete privacy. In a world where everything ends up online and everyone is on social media, there is a small likelihood that you will be found online outside of your mediator. Please understand that this is a possibility based on the level of your presence online, so you may not have the total anonymity that comes with a closed adoption.
  3. The mediator may go out of business. Fortunately, our ChildConnect portal should not be going anywhere any time soon. But, sometimes the mediator that adoption agencies offer does go out of business. Even though your adoption case history and information should be forwarded to another mediator in this event, all the confusion and red tape can make staying in touch extremely frustrating and difficult.

Contact Our Adoption Agency Today to Find Out if Semi-Open Adoption is Right for You When Placing Your Baby for Adoption

Our adoption caseworkers are ready and waiting to answer any questions you may have about semi-open adoption in Missouri. Whether you are trying to find closure with a closed adoption, have a more open and personal relationship through open adoption, or have the best of both worlds with semi-open adoption, your adoption specialist will work with you every step of the way. No matter what type of adoption you decide on, Adoption Choices of Missouri is here to help you make your adoption plan.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Kelly Felix is a graduate from the University of New Orleans. She holds a BA in English as well as a BA in Sociology. Her English concentration is in journalism, and her specialties in sociology are gender studies and environmental sociology.

When she isn’t voraciously guzzling coffee or devouring books, Kelly can be found either bent over a canvas working on her art or at her computer playing video games. She has hands-on classroom teaching experience from her time working as a substitute teacher for Kelly Services. Kelly also completed an in-house editorial internship at Pelican Publishing Company, and she finished the goal internship program at Green Light New Orleans. Kelly generally exists in a state of suspended disbelief, but when she’s not there she resides in New Orleans.

Birth Mother Blog

What is Semi-Open Adoption in Missouri?

What is Semi-Open Adoption in Missouri?

If you are a pregnant woman in Missouri, you are probably aware that there are several different types of adoption for you to consider when putting your baby up for adoption. How do you know which one is right for you? The best way to make that decision is to become familiar with your available choices. Let’s explore semi-open adoption.

What is Semi-Open Adoption?

Just like the name suggests, this type of adoption falls somewhere in the middle of open and closed adoption. It can be a good choice if you want some updates about her child, but also want to maintain your privacy.

Here are some key aspects of semi-open adoption:

  • Communication in a Semi-Open Adoption is Conducted through a Third Party

In a semi-open adoption, you will still have the opportunity to receive updates and information about your child. However, you will not be communicating directly with him or her or the adoptive family. Rather, all your communication will be facilitated by a third party.

What does that mean? It simply means that Adoption Choices of Missouri will help mediate your interactions with the adoptive parents and your child through ChildConnect, a secure and safe online portal. Rather than sending an email or a letter directly to your birth child, you and the adoptive parents will be able to exchange letters, updates and photos with each through ChildConnect.

  • You have Privacy in a Semi-Open Adoption

Similar to a closed adoption, any identifying information in a semi-open adoption is kept private. You won’t share this kind of information with your child’s adoptive family, nor will they share information about themselves with you. Communication usually occurs via email, letters or photographs. In-person meetings are very rare, although you may choose to have your child’s adoptive family at the hospital during the child’s birth.

  • You can Choose Your Child’s Adoptive Family in a Semi-Open Adoption 

You will have the option to choose your child’s adoptive family if you elect to have a semi-open adoption. You will have access to our adoption agency’s extensive portfolios of potential adoptive families. In these, you’ll be able to read bios about each adoptive family and select a couple or individual who seems like a good fit for your baby.

Your adoption caseworker is available to support you through this decision process. She can answer any questions you have and facilitate any meetings or conversations with the potential adoptive family. The final decision is still up to you, but you will have plenty of support should you need it.

How Do I Know if Semi-Open Adoption is Right for Me? 

It can be tempting to rely on others to make difficult decisions for us. However, you know yourself and your situation best. Listen to yourself when it comes to making this choice and respect your own decisions. The best choice is the one that feels right for you and your baby.

If you need support, try reaching out to family or friends whom you trust. It can be helpful to talk things over before making any final decisions. You can also turn to your adoption caseworker for support. Additionally, if you feel the need to speak to a professional at any point during your adoption journey, our Adoption Choices of Missouri offers counseling services to all pregnant women considering adoption.

Will You Choose Semi-Open Adoption?

If you are a birth mother in Missouri and are deciding which type of adoption is right for you, take some time to consider the benefits of each of your adoption options. Now that we have answered the question of what is semi-open adoption, use this knowledge to help inform your decision.

If you have any further questions, feel free to contact Adoption Choices of Missouri. We are always happy to educate you further around the features of semi-open adoption. Our top priority is that you have the information and confidence to make the best decision for you and your baby.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Molly Doyle is a native San Franciscan, Molly is an experienced educator and a dedicated writer. She holds her multiple subject teaching credential as well as her Masters of Arts in Teaching. When not teaching children or creating new written pieces, Molly can be found kicking around a soccer ball, going for urban hikes or whipping up a fruit pie.

She currently lives in Seattle, her first home outside of California.

Birth Mother Blog

What is a Missouri Closed Adoption? 

What is a Missouri Closed Adoption? 

It is a common misconception that all adoption journeys look the same. In reality, each birth mother’s adoption journey is unique. One important choice that you will have to make as a birth mother in Missouri is what type of adoption you’d like to have.

At Adoption Choices of Missouri, you will have the option to choose from three types of adoption — open, semi-open and closed. While they each have their own set of benefits, the right one for you will be based on your own needs. If you are considering a closed adoption, your biggest question might be, what is closed adoption? 

The Details of a Closed Adoption 

A closed adoption means that you and your child’s adoptive family will not have any contact. You will not meet them, and it is likely that you will know very little about each other. All the personal and identifying details about yourself and your child’s adoptive family will be kept private.

Because there is little to no contact between you and your child’s adoptive family, Adoption Choices of Missouri will play a big role in moderating any decisions or agreements between parties. Additionally, it is common for our adoption agency to select your child’s adoptive family during a closed adoption. This ensures your complete privacy. We do take this decision very seriously and will do our best to place your birth child with an adoptive family who matches the criteria laid out in your adoption plan.

The Benefits of a Closed Adoption 

The benefits of a closed adoption will differ between each birth mother’s situation and preferences. However, one benefit of a closed adoption can be a strong sense of closure. The finality of a closed adoption can make it simpler for some birth mothers to begin the process of healing and moving forward to the next chapter in their life.

Another benefit of a closed adoption is the privacy that it offers. If you prefer to keep your own information private, this type of adoption will allow you to do so. A closed adoption also means that you will not need to navigate the boundaries of open or semi-open adoptions. For some birth mothers, this can be an important factor in their decision.

The Potential Drawbacks of a Closed Adoption

Just as each type of adoption has its benefits, each will also have its own set of potential drawbacks. In recent years, there has been a larger shift towards open and semi-open adoptions. Why? In part because of the possibilities for communication that arise with the more open types of adoption.

With a closed adoption, you will not be able to know your child as he or she grows older. If they have questions about you, he or she will need to wait until they are eighteen to seek those answers. This can be confusing for adoptees, who often develop questions as they grow older and begin to discover and form their own identities.

How to Choose the Type of Adoption You Want

Just like any big decision, it is best to take the time to think through this choice. If you have people in your life that you trust, talk over your options with them. If you don’t, you can always speak to your adoption caseworker. She will guide you through your available choices and support you as you come to your decision.

Additionally, it is important to listen to yourself. You are the expert when it comes to what is best for your life. Choose the type of adoption that fits your needs and makes the most sense for you and your baby.

Include the Type of Adoption You Want in Your Adoption Plan 

After answering the question, what is a closed adoption?, take the time to think about whether it is right for you. Once you’ve made your choice, make sure to include it in your adoption plan. This will ensure that you are prepared for the future.

Remember, Adoption Choices of Missouri will support whatever decision you make. We understand that there is no right type of adoption, just the one that fits your adoption journey best.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Molly Doyle is a native San Franciscan, Molly is an experienced educator and a dedicated writer. She holds her multiple subject teaching credential as well as her Masters of Arts in Teaching. When not teaching children or creating new written pieces, Molly can be found kicking around a soccer ball, going for urban hikes or whipping up a fruit pie.

She currently lives in Seattle, her first home outside of California.

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