Birth Mother Blog

Understanding Adoption Expectations: Navigating the Realities of Adoption

Understanding Adoption Expectations: Navigating the Realities of Adoption

By: Maleah Adams

Considering adoption can be an emotional and complex decision made by birth mothers. The weight of such a choice is heavy and the impact of making that choice can present itself differently. It all depends on the mindset and the situation of the birth parents. If you have decided that adoption is the best option for your baby, it’s important to control your expectations. The first step in doing so is to ensure that you remain informed throughout the entire adoption process. This will allow you to better understand the details of your personal journey. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we will work to help you navigate these expectations so you are fully prepared for the realities of adoption. 

What are Unrealistic Adoption Expectations? 

Many expectations can arise after you ask: how do I put my baby up for adoption? It’s important to recognize that some of those expectations are unrealistic. Unrealistic expectations can stem from a variety of sources or can simply just be wishful thinking. One common unrealistic expectation is the belief in having complete control over choosing the adoptive family or expecting frequent, unrestricted contact with the child after placement. While these desires are understandable, they may not always align with the realities of the adoption process, which is governed by laws, ethical considerations, and the best interests of the child.

When choosing adoption, you may have already decided how you want the entire process to play out. However, it’s important to understand that those expectations may not be in the best interest of all parties involved. It can also prove to be difficult to manage all of these expectations during the heightened experience of a pregnancy. Once you have chosen the level of openness you desire (open, semi-open, closed) you will then assist your adoption counselor in narrowing down the adoptive families.

If you choose open adoption, you are saying that you wish to have some type of contact with your child after they are born. A family that also chooses open adoption as their preferred level of openness will adopt your baby. It’s important to understand that you will not be hand-picking the family the child goes to. Adoption Choices of Missouri will ensure that your baby will be placed with the adoptive family that is in their best interest. 

What are Realistic Adoption Expectations? 

It is of utmost importance for birth mothers to have access to honest and accurate information about adoption. This transparency helps in setting realistic expectations right from the start, ensuring that birth mothers are prepared for the journey ahead. Knowing the legal and procedural aspects of adoption can help in managing expectations and making informed decisions. Having this information and creating realistic expectations can assist you in crafting the adoption plan that works best for you and your child. 

Realistic expectations for birth mothers can include:
  • Receiving support throughout the adoption process
  • Having the opportunity to choose an adoptive family with shared values who will provide a loving and secure home 
  • Potentially maintaining some level of contact with the child

The degree of contact, whether it’s through letters, emails, or visits, often depends on the type of adoption agreement and the laws of the state. Open communication and clear agreements with the adoptive family are crucial in setting these expectations. It’s important for both parties to discuss their preferences openly to establish a foundation of mutual respect. This clarity can help prevent misunderstandings and set the stage for a healthy relationship moving forward.

Adoption Support in Missouri 

Throughout this journey, emotional support and pregnancy help for birth mothers are non-negotiable. The decision to place a child for adoption can bring a range of emotions regarding your child’s future. Knowing you have options for unplanned pregnancy is the first step in creating a better life for your baby. Access to adoption services such as support groups, therapists specializing in adoption, and knowledgeable local adoption agencies can provide invaluable assistance. These resources can offer guidance, understanding, and a sense of community, helping birth mothers to feel supported and understood.

While giving a child up for adoption is filled with emotional complexities, setting realistic expectations can significantly ease the journey for birth mothers. By seeking out accurate information on adoption in Missouri, establishing open communication with the adoptive family, and accessing emotional support, birth mothers can navigate the adoption process with greater confidence and peace of mind. 

Please do not hesitate to contact Adoption Choices of Missouri with any questions or concerns you may have regarding unplanned pregnancy or the adoption process. 

Birth Mother Blog

Choosing Open Adoption with Adoption Choices of Missouri

Choosing Open Adoption with Adoption Choices of Missouri

By Noah Abrams

Every birth mother will have a unique adoption process tailored to their ideal scenarios for each step. Along the way, you will have to make important decisions that will determine how your journey through adoption will go. An important decision you will make is the adoption type, which primarily affects the level of communication and transparency. The three types of adoption are open adoption, semi-open adoption, and closed adoption. Each comes with its own benefits and challenges, as well as varying levels of communication and transparency. 

If you are considering adoption in Missouri and interested in an open adoption, Adoption Choices of Missouri can be of assistance. With knowledgeable specialists and counselors available 24/7, we are one of the most reputable adoption agencies in Missouri. Please continue reading to learn more about open adoption and why we encourage this type.

What is an Open Adoption?

Open adoption has emerged as the most common of the three adoption types offered. It offers the most communication and transparency between you, your child, and the adoptive family. This includes before, during, and after post-placement. Additionally, you and the adoptive family will share identifying information with each other. This opposes a closed adoption, which is more final and keeps distance and anonymity between all parties.

Choosing the adoptive family is also something you will be in charge of in an open adoption. Based on your preferences, we will provide profiles of adoptive families for you to choose from. Each profile will contain information on the adoptive family, allowing you to pick the most ideal. Once you find a good match, we will have a caseworker set up a phone call and in-person meeting.

You will also have the opportunity to connect with your child in person. This can foster a bond that lasts beyond your adoption journey. If agreed upon, other members of your family can also be a part of the meetings. This helps the child with their sense of identity, knowing their biological family and establishing those relationships. It also gives the birth mother a chance to remain in their child’s life, even if it is not as the legal parent.

Why is an Open Adoption Preferred?

Open adoption offers many benefits for all parties, making it the preferred type of adoption. One of the primary reasons is because it is proactive in addressing questions or concerns from your child. It is normal for adopted children to become curious about their situation and birth family as they get older. Open adoptions allow you to grow with your child, maintaining a relationship. This helps your child with understanding who he or she is, while navigating other complexities from being adopted.

Additionally, barriers are set between both parties in an open adoption, which usually is minor, if any. Because of this, information that is requested will be readily available. Privacy and anonymity can be correlated to shame or embarrassment. Though adoption is associated with many emotions or feelings, shame and embarrassment shouldn’t be. It can be a complicated and complex journey, but it should also come with celebration and joy. A child is being placed in a loving and safe environment while all parties can foster a forever bond.

Determining if Open Adoption is Right for You

Hopefully, you will be able to make an informed decision about the type of adoption you prefer. An unplanned pregnancy comes with unique obstacles, some that an open adoption can help alleviate. You can establish and maintain a connection with the adoptive family and your child. You can also take pride in knowing that your child has been successfully placed in a loving home.  

One of the potential challenges of an open adoption includes establishing emotional boundaries. For some birth mothers, this can be considered intimidating. If that is the case for you, you may want to choose a semi-open or closed adoption. Additionally, an open adoption is more layered, requiring more involvement throughout the adoption process. Adoption is a method of closure for birth mothers. Because of this, dealing with the level of communication, legal procedures, and other protocols may cause more stress. If your life circumstances aren’t the best when considering adoption, an open adoption may not be for you. 

Contact Adoption Choices of Missouri for More Information on Open Adoptions

When choosing an adoption agency to partner with, it’s beneficial if it is full-service, licensed, and local. We offer private adoption services, and you can be assured we will be by your side until the end of the adoption. You can also be assured that we are complying with mandatory legal procedures.

Deciding the adoption type may not be an easy decision for you. You should ensure you are making the best decision for you and your child no matter what. We can educate you on each type of adoption to help you do so. At Adoptions Choices of Missouri, we are committed to helping birth mothers, their children, and adoptive families. We offer private adoption services when you decide to create your adoption plan. Working with us, we will provide the information, as well as emotional support you need. Contact us today to begin your adoption journey and learn more about open adoptions!

Birth Mother Blog

Nurturing Post-Placement Relationships in Open Adoptions 

Nurturing Post-Placement Relationships in Open Adoptions 

By: Maleah Adams 

When considering adoption, the level of openness (open, semi-open, closed) available throughout the process is entirely up to the discretion of you, the birth mother. And although most adoptions today are considered “open,” the term “open” can mean different things to different people. At Adoption Choices of Missouri we provide you with options for unplanned pregnancy, the assistance you need to navigate all open adoption entails, and the post-placement contact that will work best for both families. Which is care and consideration you may not get at your local adoption agency

What is Open Adoption?  

You may be asking yourself: If I put my baby up for adoption, will I be able to stay in touch with them after placement? Open adoptions, where birth and adoptive families have the opportunity to be in communication, allow you to do just that and are becoming increasingly common. Giving a child up for adoption can be difficult enough, and choosing open adoption can provide you with a sense of clarity regarding that choice. In open adoption, the level and type of communication can vary widely from one situation to another. Some families choose to have regular, in-person visits, while others might opt for occasional updates through letters or phone calls. These specific arrangements are usually agreed upon before the adoption plan is finalized and can be adjusted over time to meet the needs of the child.

The best definition of open adoption is the one that works best for you and your situation. And while there is no single definition for open adoption, most of them fit into two widely known categories:

  • Semi-Open Adoption: Occurs when both parties, adoptive family and birth parents, provide each other with non-identifying information (such as first names) and exchange contact indirectly through an adoption counselor. 
  • Fully-Open Adoption: An adoption in which the birth parents and adoptive family may exchange identifying information (such as personal contact information) and communicate directly.

Understanding Post-Placement Contact 

Choosing to implement open adoption throughout the adoption process can benefit all parties involved, especially the child, by providing a sense of identity and belonging. However, coordinating post-placement communication and visits requires careful consideration, sensitivity, and respect for the boundaries of all parties. Successful post-placement visits require careful planning, considering factors like frequency, duration, location, activities, and preparing the child. Below, we will explore effective strategies for nurturing these precious relationships.

  • Establish Method of Communication: From the beginning of your unplanned pregnancy, it’s important to establish clear and consistent communication channels. Both families should agree on the preferred methods of communication, whether through emails, phone calls, or letters, and set a tentative schedule for updates and visits. This idea provides stability and predictability, which are crucial for building respect and trust among all involved. 
  • Create a Flexible Agreement: While it’s important to have an agreement in place, flexibility is key. Life circumstances can change, and what works for one stage of a child’s life might not be suitable for another. Regularly revisiting and, if necessary, revising the agreement can ensure that it continues to meet the needs of the child and both families. 
  • Respect Boundaries: Open adoptions are based on mutual respect. It’s essential to establish and adhere to boundaries that protect the privacy and emotional well-being of the adoptive family, the birth family, and most importantly, the child. Discussions about what is shared on social media, the types of information exchanged during updates, and the nature of in-person visits should be had early on to avoid misunderstandings. 
  • Encourage a Child-Centric Approach: In all communications and interactions the child’s best interest should be the guiding principle. This includes being age-appropriately honest with the child about their adoption story and recognizing their feelings about their relationship with you and the birth father. Encouraging and supporting a healthy curiosity about their origins can promote a stronger sense of identity. 
  • Celebrate the Extended Family: Open adoptions create extended families that are not bound by traditional definitions. Celebrating this uniqueness can enrich a child’s life immensely. Acknowledging and asking to be included in significant milestones and holidays, when appropriate and agreed upon, can reinforce the child’s understanding of their personal story and the love that surrounds them.  

Navigating Open Adoption Challenges

Even with the best intentions, challenges can arise in navigating post-placement relationships. These challenges can include unrealistic expectations, miscommunication, and life changes. Open communication, empathy, and professional guidance can help navigate these challenges. Seeking the support of adoption professionals at Adoption Choices of Missouri can provide families with the tools and strategies to address these issues constructively. We can offer a neutral perspective on adoption in Missouri and mediate discussion to ensure that the focus remains on the child’s well-being. 

Assistance is Available at Adoption Choices of Missouri 

Open adoption represents a shift towards more inclusive, transparent, and child-centered adoption practices. It recognizes the importance of a child’s right to know their origins and maintains connections that can positively impact their sense of identity and well-being. However, it requires a commitment to open communication, flexibility, and respect for all parties involved. 

At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we provide you with the pregnancy help and adoption services  you need post-placement to assist you in navigating the choice of open adoption. If you have any questions or adoption concerns, please feel free to reach out today. 

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Exploring Different Adoption Types

Exploring Different Adoption Types

By Maleah Adams 

At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we seek to empower birth mothers and provide them with the adoption knowledge they need to make a well-informed decision. If you have researched local adoption agencies previously, you may be aware of the terms open, semi-open, and closed adoption. These levels of openness refer to the amount of contact that is to be had between the birth parents, the adoptive family, and the child. And although these terms are more commonly used to describe adoption types, they nowhere near scratch the surface of what is available. 

Exploring the adoptive family types that exist (single parents, LGBTQ+ families, etc.) can provide you with peace of mind. It allows you to choose a family that most aligns with the future you have envisioned for your child. 

Domestic vs. International Adoption 

As you navigate unplanned pregnancy and consider adoption options, it’s important to be aware of the different types that are available. Being informed throughout the entire process allows you to find confidence in your decision. Understanding adoption, and all it entails, assists you in knowing that you made the best choice possible for you and your child. 

Please be aware that the information provided is for general knowledge only and does not constitute legal advice. Consult with an adoption attorney for specific legal guidance regarding your particular situation.

Domestic Adoption 

Domestic adoption refers to giving a child up for adoption within the same country where the birth mother resides. The process is governed by the laws of that country, and the child will be placed with an adoptive family that also lives within the same country. Listed below are some key points that birth mothers should know regarding domestic adoption. 

  • Control and Choices: You may have more say in which adoptive family adopts your child and the level of openness (open, semi-open, closed) you prefer. You also have access to more adoption services that may not be available in international adoption.  
  • Legal Process: The legal process for domestic adoption is subject to the country’s laws, potentially making it easier since it doesn’t involve international jurisdiction. 
  • Cultural Unity: Your child is more likely to grow up in a similar cultural and linguistic environment. 

International Adoption 

International adoption involves putting a baby up for adoption in one country, only for them to be placed with adoptive parents in a different country. This process is governed by the laws of both the child’s home country and the adoptive parent’s country. Which is an international agreement to safeguard intercountry adoptions (U.S. Department of State). Listed below are some key points that birth mothers should know regarding international adoption. 

  • Anonymity: There’s typically more anonymity in international adoption, which may be preferred by some birth mothers. 
  • Less Control: You might have less control over the choice of adoptive family and level of openness. 
  • Cultural Differences: The child may grow up in a different cultural environment, which could be a consideration depending on your wishes for your child’s upbringing. 

Adoptive Family Types Available in Missouri 

The adoptive family selection process is sacred and personalized to meet the needs of you, the birth mother, through domestic adoption. As you sort through potential adoptive parents, you will become aware of exactly what you are, and are not, looking for. When exploring these adoptive family types, it’s important to recognize the diversity and range of family structures accessible to your child. Below are the different adoptive family types available through adoption in Missouri

Older Parent Adoption

Families where one or both of the adoptive parents are older often have more life experience and are more financially stable. They provide a more mature perspective on parenting. 

Choosing a Younger Adoptive Parent

Choosing a family where the adoptive parents are younger than the typical parenting age may provide the child with a more modernized approach to parenting. But they also might face questions about financial stability and life experience. 

LGBTQ+ Adoptive Family

Choosing a family where one or both parents identify as LGBTQ+ can offer a broad-minded approach to family life. It can emphasize inclusivity and showcase resilience against societal “norms.” They may, however, face prejudices and legal issues in certain jurisdictions.

Single-Parent Adoption

This type refers to an individual who has chosen to adopt a child without a partner. They can provide your child with a loving home and undivided attention while also demonstrating strong independence. A single parent, however, may face societal scrutiny and challenges that arise from parenting on your own. 

Transracial Adoptive Family

Families where the adoptive parents and child are of different racial or ethnic backgrounds. Choosing this type of adoption offers a rich, multicultural environment for your child and promotes diversity. Adoptive parents will, however, have to address issues of identity and racism. This will allow the child to feel connected to their heritage.  

Choosing an Adoptive Family with Adoption Choices of Missouri

Adoption types offer unique benefits and drawbacks. But a loving, stable home matters most. After you choose which adoptive family best aligns with your wants for your baby, Adoption Choices of Missouri will work to ensure the rest of the process runs smoothly. Our team will assist you through the adoption process and provide you with any pregnancy help you may need. After you commit to the adoption, a personalized adoption plan will be created to align with your needs. 

Choosing a path for your child is deeply personal, fueled by love and happiness. It’s a testament to your strength, giving them the best shot at life and security.

If you are considering adoption for your baby, reach out to Adoption Choices of Missouri with any questions or concerns you may have. We will help you explore the unplanned pregnancy options that are available and go over any adoption information that may seem confusing. Contact us today. 

Resources: 

  • “ Understanding the Hague Convention.” U.S. Department of State, U.S. Department of State, travel.state.gov/content/travel/en/Intercountry-Adoption/Adoption-Process/understanding-the-hague-convention.html. Accessed 19 Mar. 2024.
Birth Mother Blog

Choosing Closed Adoption in Missouri

Choosing Closed Adoption in Missouri

By Noah Abrams

Contrary to what some may believe, every birth mother has a very unique journey through adoption. If you are considering adoption, you should know that there are a few types of adoption to choose from. This is important to think about, as it will determine transparency, communication, and your level of authority in the adoption process. 

Adoption Choices of Missouri is an experienced adoption agency assisting many birth mothers throughout the year. We can educate you and walk you through your options to make the adoption process as smooth as possible. The three to choose from are open adoption, semi-open adoption, and closed adoption. They all offer their own challenges and benefits, but it’s important to choose the right type for you. If you are considering closed adoption, keep reading to see the benefits, challenges, and what it entails.

Diving Into Closed Adoption

Closed adoption involves the least amount of communication between you and the adoptive family. Neither of you will see each other or exchange information. You will know little to nothing about each other, assuring your complete privacy. If you are pregnant and need a local adoption agency you can trust, we are a reliable intermediary. 

 

Due to the lack of communication between both parties, we would need to mediate major decisions amongst you. We will also decide which adoptive family your child will be placed with through a closed adoption. This is to allow for complete privacy. This is an important decision, so we will try to match your child with the ideal family. You can highlight the specific characteristics you are looking for from the adoptive family in your adoption plan.

The Benefits and Challenges of a Closed Adoption

Because choosing the type of adoption is specific to the birth mother, the benefits may be different across birth mothers. Though true, one potential benefit is a sense of closure. With closed adoption having a clear ending, it can ease your mind. This could allow you to move on more peacefully. Another potential benefit is the privacy it ensures you. Closed adoption keeps your personal information private if desired. This also saves you from acknowledging and understanding the boundaries set in an open or semi-open adoption.

Recently, attitudes have changed toward the preferred type of adoption. Most birth mothers lean more towards an open or semi-open adoption. This is because of the opportunity to communicate with these types of adoption. We encourage open adoptions because of this and transparency, but it is up to you. If you are experiencing an unplanned pregnancy, understand that the choice of adoption type is yours. 

Why Consider an Open Adoption?

As mentioned, we lean towards wanting birth mothers to choose an open adoption. This is because it offers valuable benefits, some of which can last post-adoption. Those benefits include:

  • Peace of mind: It’s a common misconception to say you are giving a child up for adoption. Instead, you are placing them with a loving family. You’ll know your child is safe and loved from your experience with the adoptive family throughout.  
  • Communication: Keeping communication open allows for a fostered relationship with the adoptive family and child. It also ensures transparency between both parties.
  • Sense of connection: Communicating and staying connected with the adoptive family can help you manage the emotions you face. It also can empower an everlasting bond between you and the adoptive family.

Have you thought, “What would happen if I put my baby up for adoption through a Missouri adoption agency?” If you work with us, we will give you the information needed to ensure a smooth adoption journey. Offering services for adoption in Missouri and Kansas, our goal is only to provide support. We are not in control of the adoption process just because we are the agency. We provide support so that you feel comfortable with your authority to make important decisions. In saying that, any decisions that need to be made, including adoption type, will be decided by you.

Contact Adoption Choices of Missouri Today

When considering a closed adoption, don’t hesitate to reach out to us immediately. We will go over our adoption services and your options for unplanned pregnancy.  We can also answer any questions you may have regarding closed adoption. We have adoption specialists and counselors that are ready to help you in any way. We will support you no matter your decision, as we truly care about each birth mother we work with.

If you are pregnant, help us help you if you are considering adoption. As a fully licensed agency, we’ve provided our services for many years. We want to ensure that the adoption process doesn’t add any additional stress than you already have. Contact Adoption Choices of Missouri today if you have any questions or concerns regarding closed adoption!

Birth Mother Blog

Empowering Birth Mothers: Taking Control of Your MO Adoption Journey

Empowering Birth Mothers: Taking Control of Your Missouri Adoption Journey

By Samantha Bradley

Facing the decision of adoption can be one of the most challenging experiences in a birth mother’s life. However, with the right guidance and support, it can also be a journey filled with empowerment and control over your own destiny. At Adoption Choices of Missouri , we believe in putting the power back into the hands of the birth mother, allowing you to shape your adoption plan according to your wishes and needs. In this comprehensive guide, you will learn the various decisions that you, the birth mother, can make throughout the adoption process. In every step of the process, you will have complete control along with the support and guidance of our adoption services.

Empowerment in Choosing Adoption

First and foremost, it’s crucial for you to understand that you are in control of your adoption journey as a birth mother. Whether you have an unplanned pregnancy or you’re simply curious about the steps involved in giving a child up for adoption, you have the power to dictate your terms for your adoption plan. Your plan will align with your values, beliefs, and desires for you and your child’s future. Our agency offers birth mothers like you the opportunity to choose the level of contact you wish to maintain with the adoptive family – whether it’s an open adoption, semi-open adoption, or closed adoption.

Open adoption allows birth mothers to maintain ongoing contact with the adoptive family, sharing updates, photos, and even visits with the child. Semi-open adoption offers a degree of communication, often facilitated through an intermediary, while still maintaining some level of privacy. Closed adoption, on the other hand, involves no contact between the birth mother and the adoptive family following the placement of the child. The choice is entirely up to you, providing you with the autonomy to decide what feels most comfortable and empowering for you. 

Decision-Making Power of Adoption in Your Hands

One of the most empowering aspects of the adoption process is the ability for birth mothers to make key decisions that shape the future of their child. In reaching out to us as your local adoption agency, you have the opportunity to hand-select the adoptive family for your baby. Through the review of family profiles, you get to know potential adoptive parents, learning about their backgrounds, values, and aspirations for the future. This level of control ensures that you can give your child to a loving and supportive family that resonates with your vision for your child’s future.

Additionally, birth mothers have the freedom to create a birth plan that prioritizes their comfort and well-being during delivery. Whether it’s choosing the type of delivery, selecting who will be present in the delivery room, or outlining preferences for postpartum care, birth mothers have the power to tailor their birth experience according to their needs.

Furthermore, birth mothers determine the level of communication they wish to maintain with the adoptive family throughout the adoption process. Whether it’s regular updates, occasional phone calls, or annual visits, you have the autonomy to set boundaries and establish a communication plan that feels right for you. This open dialogue ensures that you stay informed and involved in your child’s life, even after the adoption has been finalized.

A Source of Adoption Support 

Throughout the adoption journey, birth mothers are never alone. Adoption Choices of Missouri provides a comprehensive support system to guide you every step of the way. Our experienced counselors offer emotional support and guidance to help you navigate the complexities of the adoption process. They can go over all of the options for unplanned pregnancy with clarity. 

Remember, you’re not the only birth mother who is deciding to complete the process of adoption in Missouri. You will have the opportunity to connect with many other birth mothers in your state who have walked similar paths, offering a sense of camaraderie and understanding. Through support groups, counseling sessions, and educational resources, you can find comfort in knowing that you are part of a community that values your experiences and respects your decisions.

We are Here to Support Our Birth Mothers

Empowering birth mothers is at the heart of everything we do at Adoption Choices of Missouri. By providing you with the knowledge, advice, resources and support you need, we aim to ensure that you feel confident and in control when putting your baby up for adoption. From the first step of reaching out and asking for pregnant help to choosing the adoptive family to create a birth plan and maintaining communication, you have the power to shape your adoption journey. We stand alongside you, the birth mother, offering guidance, support and encouragement every step of the way. Together, we can create a brighter future for birth mothers considering adoption, as well as for adoptive families and your child’s life.

Adoption agencies in Missouri Birth Mother Blog Putting baby up for adoption

What is an Adoption Plan and How do I Create One with Adoption Choices of Missouri?

What is an Adoption Plan and How do I Create One with Adoption Choices of Missouri?

By Samantha Bradley

Adoption is an emotional journey that touches the lives of individuals and families in profound ways. It’s a process filled with hope and the promise of creating loving bonds for the birth mother, child, and adoptive family. In Missouri, ethical adoption agencies like Adoption Choices of Missouri play a crucial role in guiding and supporting you, the birth mother, through this journey. Giving a child up for adoption may feel overwhelming at first, and that’s why our agency is here to help you in every step of the process. Perhaps the most important step of this process is creating your personalized adoption plan. 

What is an Adoption Plan?

An adoption plan is a written detailed description of what kind of family and environment you’d like for your unborn baby. For birth mothers, completing the adoption plan is a huge milestone in the adoption process. This document will outline your preferences and values regarding the family you’d like your baby to grow up with. Culture, religion, and education of the adoptive parents are all important qualities to consider for your baby’s adoptive family. You will also decide what level of openness you’d like for your adoption: open, semi-open, and closed adoption. Your counselor, whom you will meet through our agency, will help guide you with your plan. Keep in mind that the adoption plan can change with time, and your counselor can help with any adjustments. 

Why is an Adoption Plan Important?

When considering adoption, birth mothers like you may be concerned about what kind of family your baby will grow up with and if you have any say in the matter. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we are all about giving the birth mother the utmost freedom and control when deciding on her baby’s future. By creating an adoption plan, you clarify your preferences in writing, which helps your counselor understand and ensure a good fit for your child. The plan provides emotional clarity so that you’ll find the perfect family match. 

Steps to Creating an Adoption Plan with Adoption Choices of Missouri

1. Initial Consultation and Needs Assessment 

Your adoption journey begins with a free first consultation with our agency. During this first meeting with a counselor, you will discuss your hopes, concerns, and questions about your plan. Your counselor will go over options for unplanned pregnancy and help identify your needs and values. Once you are clear on how you would like to continue with the adoption process, your counselor will help you write up the document. 

2. Choosing the Type of Adoption

Once you have decided to proceed with adoption and start writing your plan, you will also decide on the level of openness for your adoption. There are three options with our adoption services: open, semi-open, and closed adoption. With open adoption, you and the adoptive family would share contact information and check in via email, phone calls, and in-person visits. If you choose a closed adoption, you would have no contact with the adoptive parents, and you would not know much about each other.

A semi-open adoption is a middle road – you may meet the parents once before birth but not stay in touch after, or you could stay in touch after through a third party. With a semi-open adoption, you would not have direct communication with your child, although you would get to know the adoptive parents beforehand. Remember that you can decide to change the level of openness later in the process.

 

3. Creating a Vision for the Ideal Adoptive Family

Our agency guides in the process of matching prospective adoptive families with children in need of loving homes. Using a thoughtful approach, our adoption specialists consider factors such as the adoptive family’s preferences, the child’s needs, and the potential for a strong emotional connection. But before considering the adoptive family, our counselors first go over your own vision for your child’s adoptive family. Together, you and your counselor will go over what kind of values, cultural and religious background, and overall environment you would like to see in an adoptive family. Writing down the details will help you when looking through family profiles. 

4. Discussing Communication Preferences and Level of Involvement 

You and your counselor will go over what kind of communication you would like to uphold post-adoption. Some birth mothers like to communicate with the adoptive parents directly through phone calls, emails, and face-to-face meetings. Other mothers prefer the agency to act as a mediator between mother and family. Some mothers find that, after starting out with an open or semi-open adoption, they would like close communication with the family. No matter what you end up deciding, our agency will be there to support you. 

Benefits of Working with Our Adoption Agency

If you find yourself with an unplanned pregnancy and you’re seeking pregnancy help, a local adoption agency like ours can help. Our experienced and supportive counselors are here to offer personalized guidance and tailoring of your adoption plan. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, your voice is heard and takes precedence throughout the entire process of constructing the adoption plan. Putting your baby up for adoption may feel overwhelming at first, but know that you have compassionate support from our agency if you decide on adoption in Missouri.

Birth Mother Blog Putting baby up for adoption

Choosing Adoption and Considering Potential Regret

Choosing Adoption and Considering Potential Regret

By Maleah Adams 

Embarking on the journey of adoption is a profound decision filled with both hope and apprehension. While the prospect of choosing adoption is courageous, it’s natural to ask yourself: If I put my baby up for adoption, will I regret it later? Acknowledging this possibility of regret is not a sign of weakness but rather a testament to the weight of the decision. 

However, amidst this uncertainty, it’s crucial to recognize the inherent bravery that you possess in considering adoption for your child. It’s a testament to the strength of character, compassion, and selflessness that supports your decision. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we provide you with the counseling you need in order to come to terms with the reality of this tough decision. We also make sure to discuss with you all of the available options for unplanned pregnancy

Addressing Your Adoption Concerns 

Exploring any potential regrets allows for thorough introspection and informed decision-making. By confronting these doubts head-on, expectant mothers can gain clarity and find peace in the knowledge that their decision was made with careful consideration. Listed below are some of the concerns that you may face throughout the adoption process.

  • Loneliness and Judgement: Though the thought is completely untrue, there are many people who still believe that giving a child up for adoption is something to be ashamed of. If you fear that sort of neglect or judgment, we offer many supportive services that can assist you in overcoming your anxieties and listen to you when there may be no one else who will.   
  • Financial Burden: The financial strain of pregnancy can be a huge concern for many pregnant mothers, but especially for those mothers experiencing an unplanned pregnancy. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we provide need-based assistance for qualified individuals. 
  • Regretting Decision: Despite how it may feel, having regret is completely normal and is not a singular emotion that only you experience. That’s why coming to terms with your loss and acknowledging the assuredness in your choice can assist you in overcoming that uncertainty. 
  • Lack of Control in Adoption Process: There are many “what-if” questions that you may have regarding the entirety of the adoption process. You may feel like because you have lost control over your body that you have also lost control over your choices. But here at Adoption Choices of Missouri, we make sure that is not the case. If you decide adoption is the best option for you and your baby, we will get started working alongside you to create your personalized adoption plan

Embracing the Choice of Adoption

Despite what society has told you, choosing adoption for your baby is not something that should be shameful. Not only are you providing them with a better life, but you are giving that life to a family that you know will love them.

Working alongside our agency will allow you access to our many adoption services that are available. You also will have direct control over choosing the adoptive family for your child. This will ensure that they will be placed in a home that you approve of. You will also get to choose the level of openness (open,semi-open, closed) that exists during your pregnancy and after the child is born.

  • Closed Adoption: In a closed adoption, the adoptive family and the birth parents share little to no contact with one another. This can often mean that identifying information about both parties is limited or completely unavailable. 
  • Open Adoption: This type of adoption allows for the birth parents and adoptive families to keep in contact throughout the birth mother’s pregnancy and/or throughout the child’s life. The term “contact” can mean different things to different families and is fully up to the discretion of the birth parents. 
  • Semi-Open Adoption: Many adoption agencies will provide a counselor as a method of communication between the birth parents and the adoptive family in semi-open adoptions. They will act as the point of contact and pass on items like photos, letters, drawings, etc.

Knowing that your baby is being raised in a loving home can bring you a sense of closure and peace of mind. You can give your baby the opportunity to grow up in a stable and loving family environment that you might not be able to provide for them presently. 

Choosing Adoption Choices of Missouri 

At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we believe in empowering birth mothers through streamlined support and comprehensive guidance that you may not find at your local adoption agency. Adoption isn’t an easy choice to make and we recognize the strength that it takes to go through with it. We work alongside the birth parents to provide a safe and nurturing environment where they can make informed decisions regarding their child’s future. 

Through our personalized assistance, we strive to alleviate any uncertainties and help you see past any regrets you may have. We commit ourselves to respecting the unique desires of birth mothers, ensuring that you feel empowered every step of the way. We provide tailored resources for birth mothers like adoption counseling and pregnancy support. 

With Adoption Choices of Missouri, you can find solace in knowing that you are not alone in your decision. Our dedicated team will work alongside you on your journey to create a brighter future for yourself and your child. If you need pregnancy help and are considering adoption in Missouri, feel free to reach out to our agency today.

Adoption agencies in Missouri Birth Mother Blog

Navigating the Spectrum of Feelings When Considering Adoption for Your Baby

Navigating the Spectrum of Feelings When Considering Adoption for Your Baby

By Eric Somarriba

Like any life-changing decision, adoption can bring out a wide spectrum of emotions. It’s a deeply emotional process, and everyone has their own unique journey and emotions. From the day you begin considering adoption to even years after it’s said and done, these feelings can often change. Some birth mothers feel intense grief and heartbreak, while others feel excitement, but even positive emotions can become grief. Whether you’re just beginning to consider adoption or you’ve already completed your journey, we’re here to help. Grief and depression can be a common result, but they aren’t the same thing. Overcoming either of them is a different process. Understanding these emotions is key to being able to find peace.

Adoption Choices of Missouri is a local adoption agency dedicated to supporting birth mothers through every part of their adoption. We understand the emotional complexities of this choice and want you to have faith in your decision. Here to explore the different emotions you’re feeling and the differences between grief and depression.

Grief After Adoption

Many birth mothers feel intense sadness after giving a child for adoption. If you’re feeling this way currently, it’s completely understandable. It could be that you did want to raise your baby, but you know you don’t have the necessary resources. Or you feel that placing your baby for adoption means you aren’t worthy of being a mother in the future. If you’re feeling this intense sadness, it’s likely you’re in the midst of either grief or depression. While similar, they’re ultimately two separate experiences that you must tackle differently.

Grief is a feeling of intense loss and is usually only thought of with the death of a loved one. But for birth mothers, it’s different; your child is still alive but is in some way out of reach. You may feel like you threw your baby away and gave them up, but that isn’t true. Adoption is a selfless choice made purely out of love. Even if you only held your baby for a few moments after birth, you still carried them to term. That still forms a deep bond between mother and child. It’s perfectly normal to feel grief after you put your baby for adoption. 

Even though they’re alive and well, it’s still a form of loss. It’s okay to take time to allow yourself to grieve; sometimes, time is all you need to recover. But if it continues to affect you, then you may want to consider professional help. One of the adoption services that adoption agencies often provide is counseling. It’s available during your pregnancy and often for a time after as well. It can be a great way to get support from a professional who especially understands adoption.

Please speak to your medical practitioner or one of our adoption counselors for more information.

Depression After Adoption

One of the key differences between grief and depression is that depression can result from a wide variety of circumstances. Grief stems from loss, and it can be one of many stepping stones to a serious depression. You may have dealt with depression before in your life, or the stress of your pregnancy helps lead to it. Another difference is that while grief is a prolonged feeling, depression is a clinical condition. You can be officially diagnosed with it, and it can be dangerous. Depression can be different for everyone. Some symptoms include:

  • A lack of enjoyment in your interests.
  • Feelings of guilt besides grief.
  • Loss of appetite.
  • Not enough or too much sleep.

If you feel these symptoms for a prolonged period after your adoption, we’d recommend seeing a professional. If you receive a clinical diagnosis, a professional can refer you to a more specific therapist for depression. You may also be able to receive medication specific for depression. Depression is a difficult experience, and an adoption agency like ours can try and help. We can connect you with local support groups made up of birth mothers who have been through similar experiences. One of the ways to overcome depression is to know that you’re not alone. There are people out there ready to listen and help if you need it.

What if I Don’t Feel Sad After My Adoption?

As stated at the beginning of this article, there’s a chance you might not feel sadness after your adoption. This is true for many birth mothers, and feeling this way isn’t any more or less valid than feeling sadness. Maybe you’re relieved that you won’t have to raise a child when you know you aren’t ready yet. You could also feel relief because you had no interest in being a parent, to begin with. There’s also the comfort in knowing a family you chose and trust will raise your baby. Regardless, it’s okay to feel some kind of relief or excitement once your adoption is over. 

Sometimes, however, that feeling of joy or relief can then turn into more complex emotions. Birth mothers who feel joy at first sometimes think they should be sad, and not feeling that way is wrong. That isn’t true. No one can say what you’re supposed to feel. With adoption, you made the choice that was best for you and your baby. If you have faith in that decision and feel relief by the end, then no one can say otherwise. It doesn’t mean you don’t love your child; adoption is a choice made from love. We want you to have faith in yourself and your decisions.

Adoption Aftermath With Adoption Choices of Missouri

We hope this was helpful in better understanding what you may be feeling. One thing we want to stress is that it’s okay not to be okay. We all go through difficult periods. Sometimes, we just need to let it all out first before beginning to heel. 

Our goal is to inform you of what you’re experiencing and how to begin overcoming it once you’re ready. Putting your baby for adoption isn’t an easy choice, but if you feel it’s right no one can say otherwise. Take the time you need to heal, but find support if you need it.

If you want to explore options for unplanned pregnancy or want to adopt, contact us. We’re ready to assist in your adoption in Missouri no matter which side of the adoption process you’re on. You can use our resources for pregnancy help or creating an adoption plan, or to help you apply to adopt. Trust us to help you throughout every step of the way.

Birth Mother Blog

What is an Adoption Process and How do I Get Started?

What is an Adoption Process and How do I Get Started with AC of Missouri? 

By Samantha Bradley

Adoption is an emotional journey that touches the lives of individuals and families in profound ways. It’s a process filled with hope and the promise of creating loving bonds for the birth mother, child, and adoptive family. In Missouri, ethical adoption agencies like Adoption Choices of Missouri play a crucial role in guiding and supporting you, the birth mother, through this journey. Giving a child up for adoption may feel overwhelming at first, and that’s why our agency is here to help you in every step of the process. Know that you have a voice and say in your life as well as your baby’s.

What is Adoption?

At its core, adoption is the legal process of permanently placing a child with a family other than the child’s biological parents. It’s an act of love and selflessness that provides a child with a stable, nurturing home. For a birth mother looking at options for unplanned pregnancy, adoption proves an ethical route to take. However, putting a baby up for adoption intimidates many birth mothers like you. You may be wondering: will I have a say in what happens to my baby? How will I support myself with an unplanned pregnancy

Beginning the Process of Adoption in Missouri

Embarking on the adoption journey is a monumental decision, but you don’t have to go through with it alone. If you work with our agency, you can rest assured that you are fully involved with pre-adoption support, family matching, legal guidance, and post-adoption assistance. We are here to offer compassionate support, expert guidance, and a clear path forward. But before you decide to begin the process, let’s outline every step so you know what to expect.

Five Steps to the Adoption Process

1. Initial Consultation

Your adoption journey begins with a free first consultation with Adoption Choices of Missouri. During this first meeting with a counselor, you can discuss your hopes, concerns, and questions about adoption. Our agency will provide valuable information about the adoption process, including financial and medical assistance we can offer you and what kind of adoption (open, closed, semi-open) you’d like to go through with. When considering adoption, this first step can give you a clear idea of what will happen with you and your baby.

2. Pre-adoption Support

Once you’ve decided to proceed with adoption, our agency will be there for your comprehensive pre-adoption support. You will be matched with a counselor who will assist you with completing necessary paperwork, looking through family profiles, and deciding what specific support you will need. Our agency can help with finances, housing, healthcare, and more. After discussing all of this, your counselor will work with you to create a concise adoption plan.

For birth mothers, completing the adoption plan is a huge milestone in the adoption journey. The document will outline your preferences and wishes regarding the type of adoptive family you envision for your child and the level of openness you desire. Your counselor will be there for personalized guidance to complete the plan, and you can be reassured that your voice is heard and your wishes are respected.

3. Family Matching

Our agency facilitates the process of matching prospective adoptive families with children in need of loving homes. Using a thoughtful approach, they consider factors such as the adoptive family’s preferences, the child’s needs, and the potential for a strong emotional connection. Our goal is to create mutually beneficial matches for you, the birth mother, and the adoptive family. We strive to lay the foundation for lifelong relationships.

4. Legal Guidance

Navigating the legal aspects of adoption can be tricky, but Adoption Choices of Missouri is here to help. We will work with you to complete legal documents, go over state adoption laws, and ensure that all legal requirements are met. Your counselor will make the legal process a breeze, allowing you to focus on staying healthy and building a connection with the adoptive parents.

5. Post-Placement Assistance

Even after the adoption is finalized, our adoption services don’t come to a stop. Our agency will remain committed to supporting you and your baby. We offer a range of post-placement services, including counseling, mediation between you and the adoptive parents, and health and financial help. Whether you have questions about parenting or simply need someone to talk to, your counselor is always here for you.

Deciding to Go for Adoption

Adoption is a journey filled with hope, love, and the promise of new beginnings. With a local adoption agency like Adoption Choices of Missouri, you can take on the journey with confidence, support, and compassion. From your first consultation to the post-placement, we will provide unwavering support and guidance. It’s our passion that every child finds their forever home. So if you’re looking for pregnant help, let us be your trusted partner.