Birth Father Birth Mother Blog

5 Frequently Asked Questions to ask a Birth Father

5 Frequently Asked Questions to ask a Missouri Birth Father

 As a birth father, you may be wondering what questions your birth child may have for you as you go through this adoption journey with your child’s birth mother. Choosing adoption for your child is such a great option for birth parents as you are choosing a great family for your child. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we have listed the five frequently asked questions that your child might have for you as a birth father.

  1. Did You Agree on the Choice of Adoption with my Birth Mother?

This question may come with a lot of emotions, as this is a hard question to answer. Considering the option of adoption, you may feel uneasy with this decision or may feel like this decision is hard to accept at that moment in time. However difficult this choice might be, it is also such a beautiful choice to give your child a chance at a better life, and you and your child’s birth mother did not come to that decision lightly.

  1. Are you and my Birth Mother still Together?

Answering this question might take some time to explain to your birth child. Maybe your relationship was complicated with the birth mother, or you both were too young to be parents. However, whatever the reason, know that you, as a birth father, may have to explain this to your child someday. Being honest with your child will let them know how loved they are despite their parents maybe being together.

  1. Do I have any Birth Siblings?

Answering this question might bring mixed feelings, but your child might be curious about their biological sibling as a birth father. Understanding your child’s curiosity is so important because they may want to meet the family that they look like and to bond with their siblings as they grow older. Letting your child find their birth siblings may make them happy to have a piece of their biological family close. 

  1. How Do You Feel About Adoption as a Whole?

This can be a loaded question as your feelings may have changed throughout your adoption process, pre and post-placement. As a birth father, answering this question will help your child understand how important your decision to place them up for adoption was and how you may feel different or the same depending on their adoption journey. Even after a yea,r s your adoption choice may not be understood by everyone. However, making sure your child knows your honest feelings on their adoption will allow for a closer bond through open communication and sharing your adoption story. 

  1. Do You Have Any Life Advice for Your Birth Child?

Having fatherly advice might be important to share with your child as they grow older, to help them get through the many life challenges they may experience. Having you be a part of their life is important so that they feel supported. You might have many things that you may want to say to them, like “Remember to do your best in everything you do.” Saying simple phrases like this will let your child know that they are loved and that they matter. Sharing some advice as your child grows and asks more questions about their adoption will make your child feel like they can lean on you as a part of their parenting support system. Your birth child will feel valued, not so alone in the world, as they navigate it. Life lessons will help them become a more well-rounded individual.

Advice Given to Missouri Birth Fathers During the Adoption Process

Adoption is a great choice, and if you a birth father are choosing adoption in Missouri then our agency is right for you. Being a birth father that is so involved is so important as a birth father, speaking with your birth child will let your child know how loved they are and understand that some birth fathers may not be supportive. However, that you as a birth father can help others understand how having a father in their life is such an important role model for your birth child. We at Adoption Choices of Missouri are here to let you know that you will have our support and non-judgmental ears as you go through your adoption journey because you deserve the kindness and support as a birth father.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Samara Wiley is a published author of poetry, essays, and an environmental children’s storybook called, Waiting for the Water Fairy. She graduated from Benedictine University in 2018 with a double Bachelor of Arts in English Literature and French. She has been published in three small poetry anthologies one was called Talented.

Her other writing accomplishments include: winning a high school poetry competition and $2500 for her high school, having two out of her five novels be considered for publication, and writing movie critic reviews for her university’s newsletter.

Although she has Cerebral Palsy and has had a turbulent childhood, Samara puts these small specs of herself into her writing to personally connect with her audience. She prides herself on pushing the boundaries in her writing and in her personal life with everything she does. Samara writes with her heart and a voice of compassion and loves to pull from her top passions in life.

She currently lives in Yorkville, Illinois with her mom and two sisters.

Birth Father Birth Mother Blog

Birth Father Roles and Responsibilities in Missouri When Considering Adoption

Birth Father Roles and Responsibilities in Missouri When Considering Adoption

Choosing adoption can be a tough decision, especially if you don’t feel like it’s really your choice. Sometimes birth fathers can feel like they aren’t in control or like they don’t have a say in the matter, almost as if they are just along for the ride. However, this simply is not the case and cannot be further from the truth. That is why it is time to finally include birth fathers as part of the conversation surrounding adoption. 

Some men tend to think that choosing adoption means they are cowardly or that they failed to provide for their family. The reality is that choosing adoption is a difficult decision for the sake of the baby, and it takes a very strong and brave parent to face this decision and follow through with it. Choosing adoption means putting your own insecurities aside so that your baby can have a chance at the best opportunities in life. What better way to provide for your child than by giving them a head start in life?

We understand what a tough and challenging position being a birth father can be. That is why Adoption Choices of Missouri is here for birth fathers as well as birth mothers. We even go the extra mile to provide a wide range of resources for both parties.

The Top 6 Roles and Responsibilities for a Missouri Birth Father

Simply put, a birth father is the biological father of a child being placed for adoption. It is very important to understand and protect birth father rights. We believe that it is important to recognize that each adopted child has two biological parents, even in cases where the birth father’s identity may remain unknown. Below is a list of just a few of the many roles and responsibilities that birth fathers in Missouri may find themselves coming across.

  1. The birth father can play an important role in the birth mother’s support network. As a birth father, the best decision you can make is the decision to support the birth mother in this endeavor. One of the most difficult aspects of being a birth father is knowing when to follow. Birth fathers should please understand that, while the birth mother’s decisions are the final say, she may have some very difficult calls to make throughout her pregnancy. She will need you to be supportive of her and her decisions. The flip coin of that is keeping the birth father informed since he is a part of your support network. It is important to keep the birth father up-to-date on any major developments, especially any medical emergencies.
  2. It is the birth father’s responsibility to provide a full medical history. It is vital to the health and safety of the baby to get the birth father’s full medical history. It is extremely important that the birth father fill out and leave a completed medical history form. Without this medical history form, doctors will not be able to determine whether or not your baby is predisposed or at risk for certain hereditary ailments, like diabetes. Even if the birth father decides not to commit to participating in the adoption process, it is imperative that you still leave a copy of his medical history that is as detailed and conclusive as possible.
  3. Birth fathers can be involved with decisions regarding the adoption plan. The level of involvement you would like is up for you and the birth father to decide on together, but if you both decide that you would like for him to be involved, then having him help make an adoption plan is a great way to start. This can look like helping decide which adoptive family criteria is important, helping to pick out the adoptive family, or helping to decide which type of adoption best suits your needs. We provide a list of pre-approved, pre-screened, and pre-qualified adoptive families in our adoptive family portfolios, so your baby will be going to a safe and loving home no matter who you choose.
  4. If you chose an open or semi-open adoption, birth fathers can write an introductory letter explaining who they are and why you both chose adoption. Based on what type of adoption you chose when making your adoption plan, you may want the birth father to write an introductory letter explaining who he is and why you both chose adoption. These letters can be super helpful to adopted children who might have some questions that their adoptive parents simply won’t have all the answers to. This is your chance to answer those questions and to fill in those gaps.
  5. Birth fathers can help make a hospital plan and be a birthing partner in the delivery room. It is crucial that you and the birth father go over a hospital birthing plan together. Will he be bringing a bag of extra clothes and any toiletries you may need? Does he want to be there during labor and delivery? Did you both want some alone time with the baby after you give birth? These are only a few of the many questions to consider when making your hospital birth plan. Your adoption specialist will help you go over the details to make a birth plan that is as informed as possible. Please keep in mind that hospitals may or may not still have COVID-19 restrictions in place regarding delivery room visitation.
  6. Birth fathers are responsible for seeking counseling and dealing with any problematic feelings regarding adoption that may arise. The adoption journey can be an emotionally volatile voyage for anyone, birth mothers and birth fathers alike. Just because he is your rock does not mean that he is not silently suffering either. That is why we offer mental health and emotional support counseling for birth mothers and birth fathers. We offer these services throughout the entire adoption process and after, while you are both adjusting to life during post-placement.

Our Missouri Adoption Agency Can Start Helping You with Your Unplanned Pregnancy 

Unplanned pregnancies can seem scary and overwhelming, but that is exactly why Adoption Choices of Missouri is here to help you. We are a full-service, licensed adoption agency that offers a variety of resources. These resources can take the form of financial assistance, medical aid, legal representation, and emotional support counseling. We will ensure that you receive any sort of assistance for which you may qualify. Our adoption caseworkers are on standby, ready and waiting to get to work helping you as soon as possible. The sooner you contact us, the sooner we can get to work helping you.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Kelly Felix is a graduate from the University of New Orleans. She holds a BA in English as well as a BA in Sociology. Her English concentration is in journalism, and her specialties in sociology are gender studies and environmental sociology.

When she isn’t voraciously guzzling coffee or devouring books, Kelly can be found either bent over a canvas working on her art or at her computer playing video games. She has hands-on classroom teaching experience from her time working as a substitute teacher for Kelly Services. Kelly also completed an in-house editorial internship at Pelican Publishing Company, and she finished the goal internship program at Green Light New Orleans. Kelly generally exists in a state of suspended disbelief, but when she’s not there she resides in New Orleans.

Birth Father Birth Mother Blog

Can I Choose Adoption in Missouri Without the Birth Father’s Consent?

Can I Choose Adoption in Missouri Without the Birth Father’s Consent?

 Do you need the birth father’s consent to place your baby for adoption in Missouri? The short and simple answer is yes. You probably do need the father’s consent. But let’s face it: relationships can be messy and complicated, and the laws regarding birth fathers can be as complex as your relationship with him. The real truth is that adoption consent laws are circumstantial. They will always vary by case and are as unique as your relationship with the birth father.

But that is exactly why Adoption Choices of Missouri is here for you during your adoption journey. We are a full-service, licensed adoption agency. This means that we can provide the best resources available to protect your adoption rights as a birth mother and to offer legal representation on your behalf.

Remember, most adoption laws and consent laws will vary by state. Please keep in mind that this article does not constitute legal advice and is not a replacement for the guidance of an expert. Instead, you should always seek legal advice from a qualified professional, like one of the many highly skilled and licensed lawyers we provide.

 

What You Need to Know About Birth Father Consent Laws When Considering Adoption in Missouri

The first thing to know about adoptions is that they are all about consent. In fact, changing your mind about adoption is even called withdrawing or revoking consent. When you place your baby for adoption, you are consenting to a legal termination of your parental rights.

In Missouri, adoption is irreversible once that consent to terminate your parental rights has been approved in court. This is because a legal adoption in Missouri makes it so that the person adopted has the same legal rights as if they were biologically born to the adoptive parents. That is why these preventative measures are set in place. The court wants to ensure that this is the desire of all parties involved because the adoption is set in stone once the court finalizes it.

 

How Missouri Law Classifies Birth Fathers When Giving Your Baby Up for Adoption

In order to ensure that all parties want this adoption and that there will be no further legal disputes, the mother, father, and adoptive family all must consent to adoption. But how do we define who the father is? There are two ways the court distinguishes a birth father: a putative father or a presumed father.

A putative father is when a man legally acknowledges that he is the father of a child conceived outside of marriage. A presumed father happens when the man is currently married to the mother or if their divorce occurred within 300 days of the child’s birth. The father must consent to the adoption if he established paternity within 15 days of the child’s birth, filed with the putative father registry, and/or satisfied Missouri adoption law requirements. A registered putative father can reserve the right to contest the adoption, just as a putative father or presumed father needs to place his consent to adoption.

But what if either of those terms does not apply to you or your situation? What if you don’t even know who the father is? Or worse, what if you’re in a relationship with the father, but being around him isn’t safe or is a danger to the baby? What if you are in the process of divorcing the father? Or if you’re just beginning a new relationship with him that you’re unsure about? Relax, it’s OK! We have you covered! Just like how your relationship to the birth father is unique, so are the laws governing adoption. Adoption laws are generally handled on a case-by-case basis, so the intricacies of your situation will be taken into account.

 

Understanding Birth Father’s Consent Regarding Newborn Adoptions

At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we go above and beyond for our birth mothers. We offer a variety of support services that provide help in the form of financial assistance, medical aid, mental and emotional support counseling, and legal representation that lasts beyond your adoption journey. We continue to take care of the birth mothers who choose our adoption agency as they adjust to post-placement life. No matter what, your adoption specialist will work tirelessly and diligently in order to protect your birth mother’s rights.

Your safety and the safety of your baby are our highest priority. Do not hesitate to contact us today so that we can begin helping you and answering any questions you may have as soon as possible. The sooner you call us, the quicker we can get to work helping you with your adoption process.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Kelly Felix is a graduate from the University of New Orleans. She holds a BA in English as well as a BA in Sociology. Her English concentration is in journalism, and her specialties in sociology are gender studies and environmental sociology.

When she isn’t voraciously guzzling coffee or devouring books, Kelly can be found either bent over a canvas working on her art or at her computer playing video games. She has hands-on classroom teaching experience from her time working as a substitute teacher for Kelly Services. Kelly also completed an in-house editorial internship at Pelican Publishing Company, and she finished the goal internship program at Green Light New Orleans. Kelly generally exists in a state of suspended disbelief, but when she’s not there she resides in New Orleans.

 

Birth Father Birth Mother Blog

Adoption in Missouri When the Birth Father is Unsupportive

Adoption in Missouri When the Birth Father is Unsupportive

Every adoption story is different. Some couples come to the decision to put their baby up for adoption together, but others don’t quite have the luxury. It can be difficult to tackle adoption alone, and difficult legal issues can arise from attempting to do so without your partner’s consent. However, sometimes you have to decide what is the right one for you and your baby. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we want to make sure you get the help you need to sort out difficult questions like this. An unsupportive or absent birth father can make things more complicated, but not impossible. Here are just a few steps you can take to work through an adoption with that situation. 

Contact Adoption Choices of Missouri For Adoption Help

Contacting an adoption agency is important for a variety of reasons. Between our staff, we have many years of experience with the adoption process and have seen many different cases with birth fathers as well. Also, we can make sure you understand the options you have in your current situation. Plus, our services will always be free to any birth mother in need. While you can find some information about making an adoption plan with an unsupportive birth father online, many factors can influence your choices. Your best option is to contact an adoption agency before moving forward with the adoption process. 

What Happens When the Birth Father is Absent During the Adoption Process?

If the birth father is not married to you or out of your life entirely, there are a couple of options. Missouri has a putative father registry. This allows for someone to acknowledge their biological parenthood of children outside of marriage. If they did register with that system, they would be notified by law if you wish to put your baby up for adoption. However, if the birth father hasn’t provided support, communication, and/or never visited the child for a period of at least six months, their parental rights may be terminated by law. If the birth father is still in your life to some extent, we can help you communicate with him and counsel you. 

Our adoption caseworkers have years of experience and knowledge to help sort out more specific details and answer your questions. 

What To Do If the Birth Father Doesn’t Want You to Put Your Baby up for Adoption

If the birth father is still involved in the life of the child and helps support that child, then courts require the consent of both parents to relinquish their parental rights to put a child up for adoption. 

This can make the task of putting your baby up for adoption even more challenging. One important thing to remember is that, for many fathers, putting their baby up for adoption is a tough decision to make. Just like you, they wrestle with some difficult feelings. Even if you have determined that adoption is the best choice for you, the birth father has to go through much of the same emotional processing. 

Tips for Communicating About Adoption

You and your adoption caseworker can work together to talk about adoption to your partner and/or the birth father. Sometimes learning more about the adoption process and making an adoption plan can make someone more willing to trust the adoption process. If the father is worried about where the baby will go afterward, we can explain the in-depth interviews and requirements for all adoptive parents. If they’re worried about being able to support the pregnancy financially, we have plenty of financial resources for housing, transportation, and healthcare. 

We want to help you communicate about adoption in a comfortable way. Putting your baby up for adoption, going through an unplanned pregnancy, and trying to communicate about difficult topics are all tasks that can weigh heavily on you. Let us take some of that weight off your shoulders and make things easier. 

Unplanned Pregnancy Options When the Birth Father is Unsupportive or Absent

You finally have decided on adoption. After looking at your options and learning about adoption agencies and resources, you know it’s the best option for you and your child. It can be a scary thing to do, but you’ve made up your mind. But there’s just one problem: how do you tell your partner about this? How will they respond? Are they in the picture at all? 

If your story sounds anything like this, we want to help you communicate and come to an agreement with the birth father. It’s important to remember empathy sometimes. Giving a baby up for adoption is hard for fathers too. Just know that Adoption Choices of Missouri will be with you every step of the way. 

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Joshua Boulet Meet the author: Joshua Boulet is an aspiring journalist and writer with a particular fondness for research and social sciences. He loves music, writing, reading, video games and most art, and anything creative he can get his hands on. Boulet believes that there’s too much good stuff out there and not enough time to see it all. He grew up on video games: the classic Sonic the Hedgehog games, Mario Kart, Marvel Ultimate Alliance, and Legend of Zelda. The music of rhythm games led him to an interest in that, and the investigative journalism of Jason Schreier inspired him to discover the importance of journalism as an industry. That interest in developers’ lives led him to an interest in social justice and how the world could maybe be made into a better place. “All this to say, there is certainly a line I can draw between me obsessively playing Sonic the Hedgehog 2 and me interviewing my sociology professor about how to read academic articles. Those surprising through lines fascinate me all the same. At my best, I’m a person who gets to be constantly fascinated by the lives and work of other people.” His favorite quote is from his favorite jazz musician: “A genius is the one most like himself” – Thelonious Monk.

 

Birth Mother Blog

LGBTQ+ Adoption in Missouri and the Frequently Asked Questions To Ask as a Birth Mother

LGBTQ+ Adoption in Missouri and the Frequently Asked Questions To Ask as a Birth Mother

As a birth mother, choosing an LGBTQ+ couple or individual as parents for your birth child is a great option, as LGBTQ+ adoptive parents are such caring people who have so much love to give. In the state of Missouri, our local adoption agencies are open to having same-sex couples become parents to your child. We believe they will make great parents. No matter what anyone says, your choice of adoptive parents is totally up to you, and your openness to LGBTQ+ parents will show that love is all that matters. We at Adoption Choices of Missouri have listed the five frequently asked questions you may have as a birthmother to your potential LGBTQ+ adoptive parents during the adoption process.

  • Why is Your Home the Perfect Fit for my Child?

A same-sex couple’s household will be with kindness, openness, and communication. Understanding the dynamics of the same-sex household will let you feel more prepared about how your child be raised and feel more relieved about choosing parents. Having a home where your birth child feels like they can express themselves in any way they want might make your child feel happy and loved. As a birth mother, knowing your child is in a safe environment with caring parents might make you feel a sense of relief.

  •  What Qualities Will you Teach my Child?

As LGBTQ+ parents teaching certain qualities, like confidence, could be an important value to learn. As your child grows up, they may experience times when confidence is needed, like being involved in certain school activities or standing up for themselves. Learning to be confident will help your child learn to embrace who they are and understand it’s perfectly okay to express oneself any way they can. As a birth mother, finding adoptive parents that will teach your child all the great lessons in their life may make you feel proud.  You have chosen such open and transparent parents to raise your child.

  • How will you Celebrate and Teach my Child About Pride?

As LGBTQ+ parents celebrating pride month is an important holiday to celebrate as LGBTQ+ parents and the progress people like you have made. To celebrate this holiday, you might want to celebrate this important month with your child; by reading books, creating pride crafts, watching child-friendly movies about different kinds of families, and explaining to your child what this holiday means to embrace the differences in others. Embracing this personal holiday with your birth child and their adoptive parents will let them know how important they are to you.

  •  How will you Address Challenges in Your Child’s Life?

 As a child growing up in an LGBTQ+ home, there may come a time where your child will be challenged physically or mentally. Your child’s LGBTQ+ adoptive parents will have open communication with your child that will allow you to understand what your child might be going through as you might have gone through as an LGBTQ+ person. Using your personal experiences to help your child grow will shape them as a person.

  • How Will You Help Shape my Child’s Worldview?

As LGBTQ+ adoptive parents might have gone through you, they might teach your child how to understand the world they live in and help them understand how people interact with different people. This includes people from their LGBTQ adoptive parent community. As your child grows into the adult they will be someday, they will have experiences with all types of people who might positively or negatively affect their life. No matter what path they walk, learning this life lesson will help your child have a more positive outlook on life and understand their community.

Advice to Birth Mothers Choosing An LGBTQ+ Adoption

As a birth mother, choosing LGBTQ+ parents is a great option. LGBTQ+ parents choose love as the main reason to decide to become parents, and they have so much love to give to a child. Having LGBTQ+ parents will benefit your child by having open conversations and teaching your child to embrace all themselves as they are. As a birth mother, considering LGBTQ+ adoptive parents, know that they may share in the life lessons and parent in a way that might make you happy. As parents, they will spend the time communicating, listening to the child’s wants and needs, and trying to give your child the opportunities and life you have envisioned for your child.  At our agency, Adoption Choices of Missouri we will be happy to help you find the right LGBTQ+ parents for you and your child.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Samara Wiley is a published author of poetry, essays, and an environmental children’s storybook called, Waiting for the Water Fairy. She graduated from Benedictine University in 2018 with a double Bachelor of Arts in English Literature and French. She has been published in three small poetry anthologies one was called Talented.

Her other writing accomplishments include: winning a high school poetry competition and $2500 for her high school, having two out of her five novels be considered for publication, and writing movie critic reviews for her university’s newsletter.

Although she has Cerebral Palsy and has had a turbulent childhood, Samara puts these small specs of herself into her writing to personally connect with her audience. She prides herself on pushing the boundaries in her writing and in her personal life with everything she does. Samara writes with her heart and a voice of compassion and loves to pull from her top passions in life.

She currently lives in Yorkville, Illinois with her mom and two sisters.

Birth Mother Blog

Why Giving up My Baby is Used in Missouri Adoptions

Why Giving Up My Baby is Used in Missouri Adoptions

As an expectant mother in Missouri who is considering adoption, you will hear many adoption terminologies as you begin your adoption process. Our agency, Adoption Choices of Missouri, will support you and help you develop the adoption language that is right for you as a birth mother. Your adoption story is such a beautiful choice that you might want to express it someday. Understanding adoption language, both positive and negative, will help you as a birth mother understand how to talk about your adoption as a whole. Adoption terminology is so important to know and will help you as a birth mother explains to people in or out of your life and your birth child, address all the questions or reasons you chose adoption. 

As a birth mother, being prepared to use the right language will help you as a birth mother and help other potential birth mothers share their adoption stories. Every term has an important meaning. The term “giving up my baby” is a retired term you may have heard when talking about adoption. However, this term may still be used from time to time. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we will tell you why we use this term and the importance of using positive language when speaking about adoption. Remember, as a birth mother, your adoption story is yours alone, and whichever terms you use to tell your adoption journey will be unique to you. No matter what anyone says, your chosen adoption language will be the best to tell your adoption story.

Why the Phrase “Giving Up My Baby” is Still Used Today

“Giving up my baby” may be said to an expectant mother to let people know she is considering adoption. Although this has a negative connotation attached to it, as an older term, at a time, this might have been used as a young expectant mother might have had to give her child up for adoption but not by choice. However, choosing adoption is a beautiful choice that might allow your child a home filled with joy. You are not giving your child any means; you are letting your child gain a family and should feel no guilt about that. This term may be older. However, you should replace this term with a more positive phrase for pregnant women considering adoption. She can say, “Place your baby up for adoption, as this phrase is more light-hearted and holds a more positive connotation than” give your baby up for adoption,” as this could seem like a more forceful phrase towards a new birth mother. Using positive adoption language when speaking to or as a birth mother will help you feel better about your choice of adoption.

Learning to Use Positive Adoption Language 

Adoption language can be positive or negative, depending on how you want to tell your adoption story. Now, we at Adoption Choices of Missouri will provide you with the proper positive language you will need when speaking about your adoption journey.

 Here are four phrases that you could say instead of saying “giving up my baby.” The following phrases are a good example of how you can express the joy and relief you might feel when discussing your adoption choice. 

  • I am placing my baby up for adoption.
  • I am choosing adoption for my child.
  • I am proud to choose adoption.
  • My choice of adoption is the best for my child. 

Advice for a Birth Mothers Going Through an Adoption

As a birth mother, you may be wondering why the term “give your baby” is still around today. This may be due to older generations not understanding the negative effect that it may have had on a birth mother. As a retired term, remember that you, as a birth mother, have control over your adoption. Positive adoption language is important as it may remind you of the reason why you choose adoption and how happy you might be that your child has the life you wanted for them. Our agency, Adoption Choices of Missouri, will support you and help you create positive language phrases that will let people know how proud you might be to be a birth mother.               

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Samara Wiley is a published author of poetry, essays, and an environmental children’s storybook called, Waiting for the Water Fairy. She graduated from Benedictine University in 2018 with a double Bachelor of Arts in English Literature and French.She has been published in three small poetry anthologies one was called Talented.

Her other writing accomplishments include: winning a high school poetry competition and $2500 for her high school, having two out of her five novels be considered for publication and writing movie critic reviews for her university’s newsletter.

Although she has Cerebral Palsy and has had a turbulent childhood, Samara puts these small specs of herself into her writing to personally connect with her audience. She prides herself on pushing the boundaries in her writing and in her personal life with everything she does. Samara writes with her heart and a voice of compassion, and loves to pull from her top passions in life.

She currently lives in Yorkville, Illinois with her mom and two sisters.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                

 

Birth Mother Blog

Considering All of Your Unplanned Pregnancy Options: Choosing Adoption in Missouri

Considering All of Your Unplanned Pregnancy Options: Choosing Adoption in Missouri

There are many different reasons why you may be considering all of your unplanned pregnancy options. Maybe you need to face a teen pregnancy and feel that you are too young to raise a baby of your own. Perhaps you are a grown woman who already has a career or a family of your own and just do not have the resources to raise another child. Or maybe none of these apply to you, and you simply feel that raising a baby is not for you. 

Whatever your reason is for exploring your unplanned pregnancy options, it’s OK! The important thing to remember here is that you are the one in control and that this is your decision to make. You should never feel pressured to make a decision that you do not feel comfortable with regarding your pregnancy. No matter what, you are the one who has the final say in what is right for you and your baby. 

At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we truly care about our birth mothers. That is why we are here to help you make the most informed decision possible with no added pressure. We are here to answer any of your questions and to provide you with any information you may need to help make your unplanned pregnancy journey as easy as possible.

Exploring Your Options Considering Adoption in Missouri

  1. Parenting or keeping the baby. It is only natural that you would want to keep your baby or feel hesitant towards any other options. But please keep in mind that choosing to parent is a huge and life-changing decision. If you are considering keeping the baby and being a parent, please be realistic about your expectations. First, it’s important that you make sure you have a good support network of friends and family. You will need someone who can help babysit or help pick up the slack when you feel tired after so many sleepless nights.

    While a financial strain is often cited as the reason for not choosing to parent, that is not always the case. Babies require a lot more than just money in order to be healthy and happy. Babies require your time, energy, and a stable environment. They need consistency in order to thrive. Please be absolutely sure that you can realistically provide the stability they need before you finalize your decision to be a parent.

  2. Terminating or aborting your pregnancy. Many women choose to terminate their pregnancy because they are just ready to close this chapter of their lives and move on. Despite the stigmas that still surround abortion, it is a fairly simple and safe procedure as long as it is done early enough in your pregnancy. Please consult your doctor regarding any medical questions you may have about the available procedures.

    You must act fairly quickly if you do decide that abortion is the right option for you. While abortion laws may vary by state, Missouri state law says that a pregnant woman cannot abort her pregnancy after 22 weeks since her last period. The only exception to this law is if terminating the pregnancy is medically necessary for the health and safety of the mother. If you wait too long to make this decision, you will lose your eligibility,, and the state law will decide for you.

  3. Placing or “giving up” your baby for adoption. Remember, you are never “giving up” when you choose adoption. Instead, we prefer to keep things positive and say that you are placing your baby for adoption. Adoption is not selfish or giving up; rather, it is a selfless act of love on your part so that your baby may have the best opportunities in life.

    Thanks to different types of adoption, like open adoption, choosing adoption does not have to feel so absolute and final. In an open adoption, both the birth mother and adoptive family leave identifying contact information so that they can stay in touch. You will be able to maintain contact with your baby and the adoptive family through phone calls and in-person visits. With open adoption, you can get to know the person your baby grows up to be.

    Not only is adoption never at any cost to you, but it also comes with financial assistance for birth mothers. Our adoption agency provides financial assistance to help curb the costs of daily expenses for birth mothers. This means providing things like safe housing or help with covering rent and utilities, medical assistance, food costs, transportation, maternity clothes, and phone service.

    We also like to go above and beyond by providing post-placement care as well. That is why we offer counseling and emotional support services for Missouri birth mothers. Even if you choose open adoption and plan to still be involved in your baby’s life, it is natural to grieve over your loss of parenthood. That is why our team is on standby to help you through your adoption journey, even when you are adjusting to post-placement life afterward.

Adoption Choices of Missouri Will Help with Your Unplanned Pregnancy

No matter which of the three unplanned pregnancy options you decide is right for you, please do not hesitate before seeing your doctor or seeking help from our adoption agency. It is important that you begin to receive any prenatal care as soon as possible so that you do not miss out on any important supplements or healthcare you may need. Waiting too long may even close off some unplanned pregnancy options that were previously available to you. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, the safety of you and your baby are our number one priority. The longer you wait to seek help, the less time you and your baby to receive care and the less open your options will be.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Kelly Felix is a graduate from the University of New Orleans. She holds a BA in English as well as a BA in Sociology. Her English concentration is in journalism, and her specialties in sociology are gender studies and environmental sociology.

When she isn’t voraciously guzzling coffee or devouring books, Kelly can be found either bent over a canvas working on her art or at her computer playing video games. She has hands-on classroom teaching experience from her time working as a substitute teacher for Kelly Services. Kelly also completed an in-house editorial internship at Pelican Publishing Company, and she finished the goal internship program at Green Light New Orleans. Kelly generally exists in a state of suspended disbelief, but when she’s not there she resides in New Orleans.

Birth Mother Blog

Putting My Baby up for Adoption in Missouri

Putting My Baby up for Adoption in Missouri

Unplanned pregnancy? Here at Adoption Choices of Missouri adoption agency, we want to provide everything we can to help you with a successful adoption. we’ve got you covered. Adoption is a kinder alternative that allows you to have a say in where your baby goes after your pregnancy. Our caseworkers will make sure you understand every step of the adoption process. When adoption paperwork or an adoption attorney is needed, we handle all the tough complications to keep you focused on what’s most important. When you’re ready to choose an adoptive family, we’ll have a variety of options ready.

Are You Considering Adoption in Missouri?

Of course, the beginning is the best place to start. Once you and your adoption caseworker set up a meeting, you can start defining the details of the adoption. Paperwork, sadly, is an essential part of this process. However, with the help of your adoption caseworker, you don’t have to worry if you’re accidentally messing something up. Completing the initial paperwork will allow you the most freedom to decide where your child goes after birth as well.

Another critical part that your caseworker will help with is finding a doctor. A doctor provides the best solution to make sure both you and your baby stay happy and healthy during your pregnancy. Tests, screenings, and ultrasounds can be a bit intimidating, but your caseworker will help ease your fears if you’re anxious about a visit. Once you’ve gone to the doctor and learned what is best for you and your baby, you may find you have a better understanding of why you chose adoption.

Finding the Right Financial Assistances To Begin Your Adoption Journey

One of the most troubling thoughts for a birth parent is, “will I be able to pay for this?” Doctor’s visits, maternity clothes, transportation, and time lost at work all contribute to a loss of financial security. For some birth mothers, they never had that financial security in the first place. To help these parents, Adoption Choices helps provide you with financial resources and matches you with state monetary assistance as well. Putting your baby up for adoption always comes at absolutely no cost to you, the birth parent. With helping you comes helping you get the healthcare you need too. We can help provide transportation and shelter during and for some time after your pregnancy as well. All of these programs are catered to your needs, so even if circumstances change during your pregnancy, we still have got you covered.

Matching Your Child with an Adoptive Family

We make sure every single adoptive family is thoroughly vetted and loving adoptive family. We also know, though, that you may like to get a say in which adoptive family is matched with your child. If you choose an open adoption, we have a variety of candidates available for you to learn about and maybe even meet.

We have a wonderful variety of adoptive parents who would be thrilled for the opportunity to raise a child. If you’re unsure about the options presented by your caseworker, we can bring more options to the table as well.  If you would rather not pick, we can choose a loving adoptive family for you. No matter the family, you can rest assured your child will be well taken care of.

Remember to Practice Self-Care During the Adoption Process

Once all the details are taken care of and we’ve found a great adoptive family for your child, it’s time to take an extra breather. The doctor’s visits, paperwork, and choices are enough to exhaust anybody who isn’t also pregnant. There is no need to be tired and stressed out for your entire pregnancy. Use your time to take a breather. Talk to your doctor about good ways to take care of yourself physically and mentally.

Have a specific craving for waffles? No one’s going to blame you for just getting store-bought ones. If you’ve been itching to bake some cookies, now is the time to try it out. If you can, be sure to take some time to talk to other people as well. There are plenty of online and in-person pregnancy support groups that we can help you get in touch with.

Working with Our Adoption Agency in Missouri

Putting your baby up for adoption is a great choice for you and your child, and Adoption Choices of Missouri wants to help you do that. Our adoption caseworkers will help you sort out all the complicated details to get you started and provide you with financial assistance. We also match you with adoptive families for you to meet with to keep you feeling secure in your child’s future.  We want to make sure that you get some rest and stay healthy while waiting for your due date.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Joshua Boulet Meet the author: Joshua Boulet is an aspiring journalist and writer with a particular fondness for research and social sciences. He loves music, writing, reading, video games and most art, and anything creative he can get his hands on. Boulet believes that there’s too much good stuff out there and not enough time to see it all. He grew up on video games: the classic Sonic the Hedgehog games, Mario Kart, Marvel Ultimate Alliance, and Legend of Zelda. The music of rhythm games led him to an interest in that, and the investigative journalism of Jason Schreier inspired him to discover the importance of journalism as an industry. That interest in developers’ lives led him to an interest in social justice and how the world could maybe be made into a better place. “All this to say, there is certainly a line I can draw between me obsessively playing Sonic the Hedgehog 2 and me interviewing my sociology professor about how to read academic articles. Those surprising through lines fascinate me all the same. At my best, I’m a person who gets to be constantly fascinated by the lives and work of other people.” His favorite quote is from his favorite jazz musician: “A genius is the one most like himself” – Thelonious Monk.

 

Birth Mother Blog

Choosing a Single Woman to Adopt Your Baby in Missouri

Choosing a Single Woman to Adopt Your Baby in Missouri

Choosing the adoptive family that will raise your child can be a very difficult decision to make. It is important to know that you have a lot of options when it comes to the types of family you can choose from. One option to consider is a single parent. If you are thinking about choosing a single parent to adopt your baby in Missouri, then you might be wondering if a single parent can handle raising a child on their own. Are there even any advantages to choosing a single parent to adopt your child? Aside from allowing a single woman to experience the joy of motherhood, your child will also receive the benefits that being raised by a single parent can provide: They will earn responsibility and independence by watching their parents. They will also still be able to have a strong support system and receive all of their undivided attention and love. Adoption Choices of Missouri is here for you if you to tailor your adoption plan if you are considering choosing a single woman to adopt your baby in Missouri.

Exposure to Independence and Responsibility

Single parents are often very responsible and independent. They usually have to tackle many things during the week, such as work, grocery shopping, and other errands. A single parent has to do all that and still set time aside to spend with their child. Know that if you choose a single parent to adopt your child, they will grow up watching their parents budget their time and work hard to get everything done. Your child will learn from observing the value of being a responsible adult.

Because single parenting is a busy affair, and since a single parent usually works, they cannot spend every moment of their time with their child. This just means that your child will learn to be more independent at a younger age. They may have to learn how to help prepare dinner or help out with other tasks around the house. Choosing a single woman to parent your child just means that your child will learn to rely less on their parents and more on themselves as they grow.

Exposure to a Support System

Simply because a single parent is raising your child does not mean that the single parent is the only person they can rely on.  Single parents will usually reach out to friends and family and even organizations designed specifically for single parents. Seeing their parent ask for help from different groups of people teaches them to use their resources to connect with others and to also not be afraid to seek help if they need it. Know that your child will grow up with access to a strong and loving support system.

Undivided Attention

If you choose a single woman to parent your child, know that they will have that parent’s undivided attention and love. Single parents are likely to develop a deep bond with their children because they can spend time with their child one on one. A strong bond must be created between a parent and child so that the child can feel safe, heard, and have a sense of belonging. Single parent and child relationships tend to have an advantage when it comes to this. Because they spend so much time with their child, and their child spends so much time with them, the parent can get to understand and know their child on a deeper level. This allows them to better guide their child through his or her life.

Allow a Single Woman to Experience the Joy of Motherhood

If you choose a single woman to raise your child, know that you are giving her an opportunity that she thought she might never have. She now gets to raise and love a child of her own. Sometimes a birth mother might overlook a single woman as a viable option for your adoption process. Don’t count single women out. If you give her a chance, you will find that she will raise your child with all of the love she has to give.

Are you Ready To Choose a Single Woman to Adopt Your Baby in Missouri?

Choosing the best family to raise your child can be difficult, but choosing a single woman to adopt your baby has many benefits. Your child will be exposed to responsibility and independence from a young age. They will also have a strong support network and have the adoptive parent’s undivided attention. The choice of whether or not to choose a single parent or other types of families to raise your child is completely up to you. Only you can know what is right for you and your baby. Adoption Choices of Missouri is here for you.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Heather Frederick is in her fourth and final year at Siena College and lives in Delmar, New York. She is completing her BFA in English and has written several plays, The Vagabond, Paneless, and Yours, for the Oppressed. On most days, you can find her in the kitchen baking and singing to show tunes. 

As a member of the BTS Army, she likes to spend time listening to Kpop and learning dance choreography.

Birth Mother Blog

What Adoption Choices Adoption of Missouri Can Do for You

What Adoption Choices Adoption of Missouri Can Do for You

Even if you live in the most rural parts of Missouri, Adoption Choices of Missouri is here to help. Sometimes the best choice to give your child the care they deserve is adoption. That’s why we offer a variety of services and resources for birth mothers looking to put their baby up for adoption. We care about our birth mothers, so we provide financial assistance, various types of adoptions, and years of experience working with mothers to you all for free.

Remember, you can always call or text one of our adoption counselors with no commitment at 816-527-9800 or message us online.

Financial assistance

Our Missouri adoption agency provides for a variety of financial needs during your pregnancy. Your adoption counselor will help you figure out exactly what your needs are and how they can assist you with your current financial situation.

If you’re homeless, we can provide money for rent and utilities and help you find affordable housing. We also provide help with transportation and medical bills to make sure you never miss important doctor’s appointments.

Especially pregnant women need plenty of food, so we provide assistance for groceries as well. Find that none of your clothes fit quite right anymore? We can help provide maternity clothes too. Whatever your financial needs are, we’re committed to helping you meet them.

Types of adoptions

Adoption Choices of Missouri offers a few different types of adoptions: open adoptions, semi-open adoptions, and closed adoptions. Most parents participate in an open adoption in the U.S. The birth parents and adoptive parents share identifying contact information, and they likely will even meet in person. This is a great option for most people, and Adoption Choices will help you choose a birth family you feel comfortable raising your baby. In a closed adoption, the birth and adoptive parents don’t meet and usually know little to nothing about each other. These are uncommon in domestic adoptions, but Adoption Choices does offer this as an option. Finally, semi-open adoptions have some contact with specific rules between the sets of parents. Sometimes this means not sharing identifying information or only sharing photos through a third-party mediator. Whichever option you choose for your pregnancy, Adoption Choices has got you covered.

We bring our years of experience with adoption to you

Our staff is all thoroughly familiar with both the adoption process and the needs of birth mothers. Executive director Amy Bryant acted as a Child Placement Supervisor since 2015 and is a licensed social worker with a master’s degree in social work. Kate Fibert, social services director, has been here since 2017 and earned her master’s in 2018 along with a clinical license. Child placement supervisor Heather Brown got to raise a foster child of her own and worked for several years as a reintegration/adoption contractor. She earned a degree in social work in 2017 and continues to raise her four children.

Adoption case manager Brandy Johnson worked for nine years with pregnant women and children. Between our team of passionate mothers and people with a passion for helping mothers, we have all the training and experience to give you the care you deserve.

Birth parent counselors at our adoption agency Missouri

During every step of the process, our birth parent counselors offer their experience and assistance. First, they help you fill out all the paperwork you need to get financial assistance. Then, they educate you on the adoption process and make sure you understand what’s happening at every stage. Then they help you find choices for good adoptive families who are all thoroughly screened and interviewed by social workers. Before your due date, your counselor helps you develop a hospital plan to make that stay comfortable. And perhaps most importantly, counselors help you navigate the legal side of putting your baby up for adoption and arrange for an attorney as well.

A compassionate adoption process

At Adoption Choices, we know how hard the adoption process can be for you and your family. Birth mother counselors provide material support, but they also provide emotional support for you. Adoption Choices only helps as many mothers as we can so we can guarantee a high quality of care for each and every mother we serve.

What Adoption Choices of Missouri Can Offer You

We offer a variety of services for birth mothers and adoptive families here at Adoption Choices of Missouri. We make sure you get matched with the financial assistance you need to keep you and your baby safe. We offer several types of adoptions in Missouri depending on your needs and preferences. Throughout our staff, we have years of experience parenting and helping other parents to keep their kids safe. In addition, our counselors will give educational and emotional support to make sure you feel cared for during the entire adoption process.

If you’re a birth mother, you can text or call 816-527-9800 with any questions or fill out our online form.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Joshua Boulet Meet the author: Joshua Boulet is an aspiring journalist and writer with a particular fondness for research and social sciences. He loves music, writing, reading, video games and most art, and anything creative he can get his hands on. Boulet believes that there’s too much good stuff out there and not enough time to see it all. He grew up on video games: the classic Sonic the Hedgehog games, Mario Kart, Marvel Ultimate Alliance, and Legend of Zelda. The music of rhythm games led him to an interest in that, and the investigative journalism of Jason Schreier inspired him to discover the importance of journalism as an industry. That interest in developers’ lives led him to an interest in social justice and how the world could maybe be made into a better place. “All this to say, there is certainly a line I can draw between me obsessively playing Sonic the Hedgehog 2 and me interviewing my sociology professor about how to read academic articles. Those surprising through lines fascinate me all the same. At my best, I’m a person who gets to be constantly fascinated by the lives and work of other people.”

His favorite quote is from his favorite jazz musician:
“A genius is the one most like himself” – Thelonious Monk.

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