Birth Mother Blog

The Pros and Cons of Open Adoption in Missouri

The Pros and Cons of Open Adoption in Missouri

Making the decision to have an open adoption is an important step in every birth mother’s adoption process. You have a few choices when you make your decision on the type of adoption you want, from open to closed and semi-open. An open adoption will provide you with a lot of benefits, like choosing your adoptive family and overall emotional support. Despite this, it can come with disadvantages, like a need to set up boundaries and a lack of closure. When discussing the pros and cons of open adoption in Missouri, it is important to keep in mind what you want out of your adoption process, because it can be different for everyone. Adoption Choices of Missouri understands that. We want to help you however we can. Here are just some of the pros and cons of open adoption you should consider when choosing to have an open adoption in the state of Missouri.

The Pros of Open Adoption

Generally, it seems that the positives of an open adoption often outweigh the negatives. But this can certainly change from birth mother to birth mother, depending on your personal and individual circumstances. In terms of benefits, open adoption can offer you:

  • Emotional comfort and security. One of the major benefits of open adoption relates to your own emotional well-being. Open adoption grants you a lot of opportunity when it comes to your child’s future, giving you the ability to choose. These options give birth mothers more of a hand in how their adoption process goes, which creates an important level of emotional security for any birth mother worried about their child’s future.
  • Control over your child’s future. Though it isn’t the case for all birth mothers, many find themselves wanting to exercise some level of control over their adoption process. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we believe every birth mother deserves a personalized adoption experience. In an open adoption, you are allowed to choose your child’s adoptive family based on a number of factors, and you will also have the opportunity to talk with them about how much you would like to communicate.
  • A connection with your child. In addition to granting you control, choosing an open adoption also allows you to remain a central figure in your child’s life after the adoption is finalized. While you do not have any direct role in parenting your child, you will be able to communicate with them and keep in touch with them as they grow alongside their adoptive family. 
  • Lasting open relationships with your adoptive family. Building a lasting relationship with your child’s adoptive parents will also allow you to have a closer connection with your child. This is an important relationship that you’ll form with the people who share a common bond with your child.

All of these options combine to give you and your child a brighter future where both of you can still be a part of each others’ lives, even in difficult circumstances. These are just a few of the many benefits that open adoption offers you as a birth mother.

The Cons of Open Adoption

While these are all fantastic reasons to consider an open adoption, they aren’t necessarily for everyone. The negatives may also outweigh the positives, in which case you should consider another type of adoption. Some of the drawbacks of an open adoption include:

  • Setting up difficult emotional boundaries. Working with another family to set up an open adoption might seem intimidating. If setting up difficult boundaries for communication and visitation doesn’t sound like something you’re capable of, that’s perfectly valid. 
  • Drawing out a potentially stressful process. Some birth mothers turn to adoption as a way to provide emotional closure on an unplanned pregnancy. For someone going through a very stressful and uncertain period of their life, building a lasting relationship with an adoptive family and their child may not be in their best interest. 

At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we understand that every adoption is different and that you might not be coming from the same perspective. If you decide after weighing the pros and cons of open adoption in Missouri that it might not be what you need, that’s perfectly fine, and something that our adoption agency is more than happy to accommodate.

What Are Your Thoughts about Open Adoption in Missouri?

These are certainly not an exhaustive resource, but Adoption Choices of Missouri wants you to know at least some of the pros and cons of open adoption in Missouri before you make any decision about your future. We believe the adoption process should be available for anyone who needs it, regardless of whether or not you feel an open adoption is best for you and your child. 

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the AuthorJosh Drogemuller is a Senior at Grand Valley State University and has interests in writing and digital studies. A relative newcomer to the field of professional writing, Josh has spent the last eight years of his educational career honing his skills on the page. Josh is currently working towards a Bachelor of Science in Writing. 

Living in the Midwest, Josh looks forward to long baseball games and longer sentences.

If you find yourself debating what kind of adoption is best for you, or would just like to learn more about open adoption for yourself, don’t hesitate to talk to us. We’d be happy to help.

 

Birth Mother Blog

Maternity Leave for Birth Mothers, Adoptive Mothers, and LGBTQ+ Parents in Missouri Adoptions

Maternity Leave for Birth Mothers, Adoptive Mothers, and LGBTQ+ Parents in Missouri Adoptions

Adoption comes with many hard decisions, and as parents, you want to do the best for your child. The state of Missouri offers maternity leave for all types of parents, both birth and adoptive parents. Being a new parent will come with a period of getting to know your baby. As parents, you may be wondering how managing life with a new child is possible. The time you have with your child to grow your bond and create happy memories as a new family. We at Adoption Choices of Missouri have answered your questions by explaining the three types of parental leave you may have when making the wonderful choice of adoption.

The Three Types of Parental Leave

  • Maternity Leave Laws 

In Missouri adoptions, every type of parent can be on maternity leave, which either happens twelve weeks after your child’s birth or after your adoption has been finalized. The parental leave law in Missouri states that the main parent-which may be the mother of the child, gets six weeks off on maternity leave, and the father or partner of the mother may get three weeks on paternity leave. You may also have parental leave at the same time as your partner if you are a working couple. No matter what your circumstances are, know that we at Adoption Choices of Missouri will help you understand your parental leave so that you can fully embrace your new role as a birth parent or as an adoptive parent.

  • Birth Mother Maternity Leave

As a birth mother, you may not know this, but you will have maternity leave to deal with your adoption process as a whole. You may have to deal with adoption emotions such as emotions like grief, longing, sadness, and time to heal after you have just given birth and placed your child with his or her parents. As a birth mother, you need time to adjust to placing your child up for adoption. Your estimated maternity leave may depend on your particular situation. For instance, if you had a safe and healthy delivery and your job title. Remember, as a birth mother, your voice matters. 

  • Adoptive Mother Leave

Your child’s adoptive mother might want to spend every moment with her new adopted child. While she is on maternity leave, she will have one on one time to get to know your child. As a new adoptive mother, she will most likely get twelve weeks off to adjust to her routine. Her maternity leave will depend on many factors, such as her job or lifestyle. As an adoptive mother, you will get the support you need by going to adoptive mother’s meetings in the Missouri area provided by our agency, Adoption Choices of Missouri, to understand your beautiful role as an adoptive mother.

  • LGBTQ+ Adoptive Parent Parental Leave

As LBGTQ+ adoptive parents, you will get the same time off as previously mentioned for parental leave. As adoptive parents, you both will form a bond with your baby and learn to understand them as they grow and change. During your parental leave, you and your partner will take time to understand the dynamics of parenthood and grow together as parents. 

Advice to Birth Mothers, Adoptive Mothers, and LGBTQ+ Parents 

Like any parent, you will get the parental leave that you need to physically, mentally, and emotionally grow as a parent to your child. As a birth mother, adoptive mother, or LGBTQ+ parents, remember that your parental leave is for your benefit to grow in your adoption in every way and to try and be the best parent you can. As birth parents remember, your parental leave is just as important as your child’s adoptive parents,, and that no one will fault you for taking time off for you.   No matter what, Adoption Choices of Missouri will be here to support you as you go through your parental leave because adoption can be such an emotional journey and affect every aspect of your life, so taking the time to focus on your well being and well-being of your child while on parental leave, will benefit your adoption process and make you feel better as a parent or parents.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Samara Wiley is a published author of poetry, essays, and an environmental children’s storybook called, Waiting for the Water Fairy. She graduated from Benedictine University in 2018 with a double Bachelor of Arts in English Literature and French.She has been published in three small poetry anthologies one was called Talented.

Her other writing accomplishments include: winning a high school poetry competition and $2500 for her high school, having two out of her five novels be considered for publication and writing movie critic reviews for her university’s newsletter.

Although she has Cerebral Palsy and has had a turbulent childhood, Samara puts these small specs of herself into her writing to personally connect with her audience. She prides herself on pushing the boundaries in her writing and in her personal life with everything she does. Samara writes with her heart and a voice of compassion, and loves to pull from her top passions in life.

She currently lives in Yorkville, Illinois with her mom and two sisters.

Birth Mother Blog

The Basics Every Birth Mother Should Know When Choosing Adoption Through a Missouri Adoption Agency

The Basics Every Birth Mother Should Know When Choosing Adoption Through a Missouri Adoption Agency

Are you a pregnant woman or birth mother trying to find out more information about adoption, but suddenly you feel like you’re drowning in a sea of information? Or the articles you do find are all geared towards prospective adoptive families, with you feeling left out in the cold? With so much material about adoption floating around out there, navigating your adoption options can feel a bit overwhelming sometimes. But we are here to throw you a lifeline and tell you that it’s all going to be OK! Adoption Choices of Missouri is here for you with around-the-clock care and support for any of your adoption needs or questions about our Missouri adoption agency. 

What You Should Know When Putting Your Baby Up for Adoption in Missouri

The most important rule to remember when it comes to adoption is that you, the birth mother, are the one in control. After all, adoption is all about consent. You should never feel like you are being pressured into making such an important decision, and you reserve the right to change your mind about adoption at any point in the process. You are the one choosing to place your baby for adoption, which means you get to call the shots. But what exactly does that entail? And how does that work when using an adoption agency?

  • You get to make the adoption plan and choose what type of adoption is right for you. As the birth mother, you get to make your own adoption plan. This means that you get to decide what level of involvement you would like after the adoption is completed. Depending on what type of adoption you pick, you can have an open, semi-open, or closed adoption. In an open adoption, you and the adoptive family leave identifying information so that you can maintain contact through phone calls and in-person visits. This allows you to stay in touch and get to know your child as he or she grows up throughout the years. Your adoption caseworker will be able to go more in-depth over the details of making an adoption plan and laying out visitation guidelines. 
  • Birth mothers get to select the adoptive family. A major part of making your adoption plan is selecting the adoptive family. Some factors to consider are whether you’re open to different backgrounds, like transracial, LGBTQ+, or single-parent adoptive families. Although there are many adoptive family criteria to consider, you should know that every family in our adoptive family portfolios has been pre-screened and pre-qualified. We perform rigorous home studies to ensure that your baby is going to a safe and loving home that will give them the best opportunities in life, no matter which adoptive family you choose. 
  • There are many financial, medical, and legal resources available for birth mothers. Remember, adoption should never be at any cost to you, the birth mother. In fact, you should actually be receiving some of the financial assistance available to birth mothers. Some of the services we provide access to are safe housing, rent and utility assistance, transportation, medical aid, and legal representation. Your adoption caseworker will work hard to make sure that you receive any and all of these resources that are available to you. 
  • You are never alone on your adoption journey. Even though you are making this loving and selfless decision so that your baby may have the best prospects in life, it is only natural that you will experience some grief over the loss of parenthood. We understand that it is not always easy to adjust to post-placement life overnight. Not only are there plenty of birth mother blogs and discussion groups available to you, but we also offer mental health and emotional support services for birth mothers. These counseling services even extend beyond to after the adoption process is completed.
      
  • Please make sure that you pick an adoption agency that is both full-service and licensed. It is crucial that you choose an adoption agency that is both a full-service and licensed agency. In order to receive all the extra 24/7 care and support, as well as access to all of those important resources mentioned before, you need an adoption agency that will work tirelessly to make sure that you have all the financial, medical, legal, and emotional support services that are available to you. Additionally, going through a licensed adoption agency will ensure that the adoptive family you are placing your baby matches our high-quality standards by performing home studies.

Call Us Today If You Are Pregnant and Considering Adoption Through a Missouri Adoption Agency

Whether you are a birth mother who has already chosen adoption or a pregnant woman who needs help exploring your unplanned pregnancy options, our Missouri adoption agency is here to help you every step of the way. Our adoption specialists will gladly answer any questions you may have as they help guide you on your adoption journey. Call Adoption Choices of Missouri today so that we can get to work helping you as soon as possible.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Kelly Felix is a graduate from the University of New Orleans. She holds a BA in English as well as a BA in Sociology. Her English concentration is in journalism, and her specialties in sociology are gender studies and environmental sociology.

When she isn’t voraciously guzzling coffee or devouring books, Kelly can be found either bent over a canvas working on her art or at her computer playing video games. She has hands-on classroom teaching experience from her time working as a substitute teacher for Kelly Services. Kelly also completed an in-house editorial internship at Pelican Publishing Company, and she finished the goal internship program at Green Light New Orleans. Kelly generally exists in a state of suspended disbelief, but when she’s not there she resides in New Orleans.

Birth Mother Blog

4 Reasons Birth Fathers May Feel Forgotten In Missouri Adoptions 

4 Reasons Birth Fathers May Feel Forgotten In Missouri Adoptions 

As a birth mother, your child’s birth father is such an important part of your child’s adoption story. Now, you as a birth mother may not feel the same way, as this could be due to you not being together with the birth father. However, as a birth mother, you should try to include your child’s birth father in these decisions regarding your birth child and your adoption process. As a birth, mother co-parenting can be a challenge but your child’s birth father should be considered in this adoption equation as he may feel left out if things have not always gone smoothly between you two. At our agency, Adoption Choices of Missouri, we have listed the top four reasons you may forget about your child’s birth father. Our local agency in Missouri will fully support and guide you to help you coexist peacefully with your child’s birth father. 

There may be negative misconceptions surrounding birth papas and the reasons they may be forgotten as this may be due to fear felt by birth mothers. So as a birth mother consider these reasons when considering your child’s birth father.

The Four Misconceptions about Birth Fathers 

1.The Birth Parents are Not Together 

As a birth father who might not be together with your child’s birth mother, know that just because you two do not together does not mean you matter any less. You, as birth parents, both matter. Your child’s birth mother may think of not being together as a reason to forget about you as a birth father. However, remember, as a birth father, you are an important member of your birth child’s life, and just because you guys are not together doesn’t mean you can’t work together to give your child a chance at a beautiful life.

2.The Birth Mother May Think She is All Alone

The birth mother of your child may feel like she is in this alone and has no support. However, this is quite the opposite, as a birth father might want to be involved in the adoption process for their child. As a birth father, your child’s birth mother may not consider this as she may be overwhelmed with this unplanned pregnancy. Showing her support by attending appointments, talking to her about her choice to choose adoption, and if she needs anything, will reassure her that you care and that she is not alone during your adoption journey.

3.The Birth Father Who is Far

As a birth father who may not live close to your child’s birth mother, she may think you don’t care about your birth child, hence her not reaching out to you, the birth father. Now, this reason is not always the case, as many birth fathers would probably love to be involved in their birth child’s life, despite not being in the same state as their child’s birth mother. As a birth mother, you should try to reach out to your child’s birth father; even if you think they may not talk to you, they may still want to support you and your child. As  your birth child gets older they want to get to know their birth father, so you as a birth mother may have to decide  

4.The Birth Father Who Who May Not be Emotionally Ready

Finding out you were going to be a father may have been scary, especially when you could not care for your child. Maybe the birth mother of your child feels like you are not emotionally ready to accept parenthood and the choice of adoption, so she decides to place your child for adoption and make all the decisions herself. Although this reason may seem unfair, some birth fathers may feel mature enough to go along with this decision. As a birth father, you will probably go through the same emotions of sadness, grief, acceptance that your child’s birth mother. Your child’s birth mother may have to understand that it may take you a while to be emotionally okay with this decision. You, as a birth father, are emotionally ready to decide and accept the choice of adoption.

Advice to Birth Fathers 

As a birth father, your child’s birth mother may have all kinds of reasons not to include you in your child’s adoption process, but these previously mentioned reasons should not discourage you in any way. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we believe that birth parents are important pieces of your child’s adoption journey. As a birth father, you should have open communication with your child’s birth mother to let her know that you are a part of this adoption journey. She should know that everything does not fall on her as the birth mother because you guys can work together to be the best birth parents your birth child deserves.  As a birth mother who is considering adoption and may be dealing with this problem with your child’s birth father, we at Adoption Choices of Missouri will help you work together for a positive adoption 

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Samara Wiley is a published author of poetry, essays, and an environmental children’s storybook called, Waiting for the Water Fairy. She graduated from Benedictine University in 2018 with a double Bachelor of Arts in English Literature and French.She has been published in three small poetry anthologies one was called Talented.

Her other writing accomplishments include: winning a high school poetry competition and $2500 for her high school, having two out of her five novels be considered for publication and writing movie critic reviews for her university’s newsletter.

Although she has Cerebral Palsy and has had a turbulent childhood, Samara puts these small specs of herself into her writing to personally connect with her audience. She prides herself on pushing the boundaries in her writing and in her personal life with everything she does. Samara writes with her heart and a voice of compassion, and loves to pull from her top passions in life.

She currently lives in Yorkville, Illinois with her mom and two sisters.

Blog

How to Choose LGBTQ+ Adoptive Parents when Putting Your Baby Up for Adoption in Missouri

How to Choose LGBTQ+ Adoptive Parents when Putting Your Baby Up for Adoption in Missouri

There are many different factors to consider when picking your baby’s adoptive family. Are you open to the idea of a same-sex couple or LGBTQ+ individual adopting your child? Are you already aware of the benefits of choosing an LGBTQ+ adoptive family, or are you here because you want to learn more and explore every adoption option?

Then Adoption Choices of Missouri might be the right adoption agency for you. We welcome all walks of life and actively encourage nondiscriminatory practices. We encourage birth mothers to open your heart and select the adoptive family that best suits your needs, regardless of their gender or sexual orientation.

5 Major Criteria for Birth Mothers to Consider when Choosing LGBTQ+ Adoptive Parents

There are also many other criteria to consider when choosing LGBTQ+ adoptive parents. Picture the adoptive family you would like to place your baby with. Think about which aspects of an adoptive family are important to you and which are unimportant. Let’s explore some of the prominent features of an adoptive family that you may not have considered yet.

  1. Think of any other adoptive family criteria that may be important to you. Is it important to you that the adoptive parents look similar to your baby, or are you open to a transracial adoption? Would you like it if your baby has siblings, perhaps an older brother or sister? Is it important to you that certain values or religious beliefs are passed on to your baby? What about geographic location? Living very far away from each other could make open adoption visits a little difficult. These are all different aspects to consider when selecting your baby’s adoptive family.
  2. Would you prefer a single LGBTQ+ individual or a same-sex couple as your baby’s adoptive family? Are you open to the idea of a single parent raising your child, or does a two-parent home make you feel more comfortable? There are actually three types of LGBTQ+ couples who adopt children: same-sex couples, a single LGBTQ+ person, or a second-parent adoption in which one partner is adopting the other partner’s child. 
  3. Decide what type of adoption you would like for your adoptive family. When making your adoption plan, you get to choose between an open, closed, and semi-open adoption. You get to choose what type of adoption you would like and your level of involvement in your baby’s life post-placement. If you decide to choose an open adoption, you can even maintain contact via phone calls and in-person visits. We strongly encourage open adoption because we believe it is the type of adoption that is the most beneficial to everyone. Make sure that you go over the details of what level of involvement you would like with your adoption caseworker so that you and the adoptive family can reach an agreement beforehand.
  4. Check into any financial assistance available for birth mothers from the adoptive family. Remember, placing your baby for adoption is never at any cost to you. Depending on the outcome of any home studies or evaluations, some financial assistance for adoption may be available to you. Sometimes this assistance can come in the form of government programs as well as direct contributions from the adoptive family. Our adoption agency also provides access to other services like medical aid, transportation, legal representation, and emotional support counseling. Check with your assigned adoption specialist to go over what programs are open to you and to see what levels of financial assistance you may qualify for.
  5. Full-service, licensed adoption agencies like us provide pre-screened and pre-qualified adoptive family portfolios. Our adoption agency is a full-service, licensed adoption agency. This means that we perform in-depth at-home studies when selecting candidates for adoptive parents. This means that all of the families in our adoptive family portfolios have undergone a rigorous and thorough investigation to ensure that they fit our quality of standards. We do this to ensure that your baby is going to a safe and loving home that can provide the best opportunities in life for them, no matter which adoptive family you select from our portfolios.

Call Our Adoption Agency Today for Unplanned Pregnancy Help when Considering an LGBTQ+ Adoptive Family in Missouri

Please do not wait or hesitate to call Adoption Choices of Missouri today. Our adoption specialists are ready and waiting to answer any of your adoption questions and to begin helping you make your adoption plan. The longer you wait to contact us, the longer until we can begin going over your unplanned pregnancy options with you. Please get in touch with our adoption agency as soon as possible so that we can get to work helping you.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Kelly Felix is a graduate from the University of New Orleans. She holds a BA in English as well as a BA in Sociology. Her English concentration is in journalism, and her specialties in sociology are gender studies and environmental sociology.

When she isn’t voraciously guzzling coffee or devouring books, Kelly can be found either bent over a canvas working on her art or at her computer playing video games. She has hands-on classroom teaching experience from her time working as a substitute teacher for Kelly Services. Kelly also completed an in-house editorial internship at Pelican Publishing Company, and she finished the goal internship program at Green Light New Orleans. Kelly generally exists in a state of suspended disbelief, but when she’s not there she resides in New Orleans.

Birth Father Blog

Choosing a Single Father to Adopt Your Baby in Missouri

Choosing a Single Father to Adopt Your Baby in Missouri

If you’re considering unplanned pregnancy options, you may already have seen that adoptive families come in all shapes and sizes. Some are straight couples; some are gay couples looking to grow their family. It may surprise you to learn that some adoptive families are single mothers and fathers. Some people find themselves uninterested or uninvolved in marriage but still want to have children. For single fathers, the only choice to have a child is either surrogacy or adoption. And given the high cost of surrogacy, adoption is usually their first choice. It may seem like an unconventional parenting setup, but there are a variety of advantages to having a single father. Here are just a few reasons why Adoption Choices of Missouri thinks you should consider a single father when giving your baby up for adoption. 

Single Fathers have Great Time Management

Sometimes even the most loving couples struggle with time management. Between finding time for each other, their jobs, and their children, they have a plethora of tasks to keep track of. They usually make it work out in the end, but it isn’t without some considerable effort. This results in schedules being a little more disorganized.  

It’s a basic principle: the more complicated something is, the harder it is to manage. While it may seem like single fathers would be kept busy, they are great at keeping a good handle on their schedule. With only their own and soon to be their child’s schedule to worry about, they have learned how to keep their lives well organized. 

Few Fights over Finances

One of the most commonly cited topics of arguments for married couples is money. 2 parents many times means two jobs. Finding a balance that doesn’t frustrate either member of the couple can take months to even years to perfect. Even when there’s only one income, choosing spending money limits and budgeting still provides a hefty challenge. For single fathers, much of the friction is removed from the financial situation. There’s no need to pool money from multiple accounts or hire someone to help figure out complicated tax returns. Plus, less time spent fretting over money is more time spent with your child post-adoption. 

Another advantage single fathers have financially is various government grants and tax breaks that they may apply for. Particularly while the child is young, the father will have the money and time to make sure they can properly care for them. 

Single Fathers Meet Adoption Requirements 

To adopt a child, all adoptive families are required to meet a variety of standards called a home study in Missouri and throughout the U.S. First, they must have all of their forms in order. That means proof of employment, ample yearly income, medical records, IDs, birth certificates, and proof of citizenship. As the name implies, the home study will also examine the father’s home itself. Gates should be on stairs, a first aid kit should be easily available, and plastic covers over electrical outlets. They also check for lead paint, working smoke alarms, and carbon monoxide detectors. 

The social worker involved with the home study also conducts an interview with the adoptive father. Common questions include inquiries about their job, their opinions on diversity, their motivations to adopt, and their parenting styles. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we also have our own standards for adoptive families to meet, such as a requirement for non-discrimination and for parents to always provide healthcare for their children. 

No Competing for Time Between Spouse and Child

Marriages can be shaken up when a child is added to the mix. Of course, their shared care for the child brings them together to an extent. But that doesn’t come without added stress as their attention is now split between caring for each other and caring for their child. When they’re so caught up in the needs of their child, it can be easy to forget about each other’s needs. 

While single parenting certainly isn’t easy either, these fathers don’t have to worry about splitting their family time between their spouse and their child. 

Single Fathers as Adoptive Parents

Adoption Choices of Missouri wants you to have the best experience finding an adoptive family. Single fathers can provide a great environment for a child. Their time management is among the best and their finances are simple and organized. Plus, there’s more government assistance available to single parents. Single fathers have also met the in-depth requirements for adoptions in Missouri. Want to learn more about adoptive single fathers and building an adoption plan? Contact Adoption Choices of Missouri today! 

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Joshua Boulet Meet the author: Joshua Boulet is an aspiring journalist and writer with a particular fondness for research and social sciences. He loves music, writing, reading, video games and most art, and anything creative he can get his hands on. Boulet believes that there’s too much good stuff out there and not enough time to see it all. He grew up on video games: the classic Sonic the Hedgehog games, Mario Kart, Marvel Ultimate Alliance, and Legend of Zelda. The music of rhythm games led him to an interest in that, and the investigative journalism of Jason Schreier inspired him to discover the importance of journalism as an industry. That interest in developers’ lives led him to an interest in social justice and how the world could maybe be made into a better place. “All this to say, there is certainly a line I can draw between me obsessively playing Sonic the Hedgehog 2 and me interviewing my sociology professor about how to read academic articles. Those surprising through lines fascinate me all the same. At my best, I’m a person who gets to be constantly fascinated by the lives and work of other people.” His favorite quote is from his favorite jazz musician: “A genius is the one most like himself” – Thelonious Monk.

Birth Father Birth Mother Blog

The Top 5 Things People Get Wrong About Birth Fathers in Missouri Adoptions 

The Top 5 Things People Get Wrong About Birth Fathers in Missouri Adoptions 

As a Birth Father in Missouri, there will be common things or misconceptions that people may have about you. At our local adoption agency in Missouri,  Adoption Choices of Missouri, we have listed the five things people get wrong about birth fathers in Missouri. Learning about these common things will help you as a birth father explain your greatest choice in choosing adoption to people and your child. No matter what people say, know that you, as a birth father, will have the support you need from our adoption agency in Missouri and as an important person in your child’s life. 

 

  • A Birth Father Does Not Want to be involved in the Child’s Life

This is a common misconception about birth fathers in Missouri that people may have. However, many birth fathers want to be involved in their child’s life to provide their child with all the support, love, and advice they may need. As a birth father, your child might be happy to know you as an important part of their adoption story. Being involved in your child’s life will help grow a bond that your child will cherish. 

 

  • A Birth Father Who Did Not Support the Choice of Adoption 

Adoption can be a hard choice to understand for some people in your life, but a decision like this is made out of pure love for your child. This common misconception is wrong, as most birth fathers come to understand the beautiful choice of adoption and want to give their child the best chance at a better life than they can. Now, my baby’s birth father was present and supported me through the adoption process by helping me pick our child’s adoptive family, helping me choose the type of adoption–open adoption fit us the best, and choosing to come to all his child’s big moments in life.

  • A Birth Father Who Does Not Love His Child

As a birth father, you may hear the common phrase that you did not love your child even from the people around you. This phrase may be due to people’s misconception about birth fathers in Missouri not loving their child and leaving him or her. However, as a birth father, you will love your child and will have a special bond with them as the months and years go by because no matter what, your child will appreciate the memories they create with you.  

 

  • A Birth Father Who Struggles with Mental Illness 

As a birth father who may be struggling with mental illness, people may think you are unfit to be a parent. However, know that you are taking steps to get better as a birth father and that you are no less of a birth father just because you struggle with something. No matter what anyone says, you will always be a birth father who loves and wants their child’s best. 

 

  • A Birth Father Who Is Not With the Birth Mother 

Having a relationship with your child’s birth mother may be tricky, and that’s okay. As a birth father who may not be with your child’s birth mother for reasons unknown, people may wonder and ask this question a lot. Now, you as a birth father may choose to answer this question any way you feel comfortable. This misconception may not necessarily be true, as many birth parents might work together peacefully for the sake of their child.

 

  • A Birth Father Who may Not Visit or Call

 Being a birth father and getting to know your child is so important. There is a common misconception that a birth father may not want to call or visit their child. However, this is not always the case, as most birth fathers might be happy to call or visit their child. Weekly or monthly video calls, in-person visits, and even letters might make your child feel closer to you; let them know you care about them and want to get to know them better. Having open communication with your birth child is such an important aspect of your adoption process, as it lets your child know that they have an extra person to come to if they need it. 

Advice to Birth Fathers During the Adoption Process

Remember, as a birth father, our agency, Adoption Choices of Missouri, will be here to help you answer these common misconceptions that people may have for you. We will make sure you have the tools to answer these questions most positively so that people may understand your adoption choice. As a birth father, you may always get these things asked or assumed but, know that you as a birth father can help change the minds of people and other birth fathers regarding the difficult but great choice of adoption. Our adoption agency in Missouri will be here to help you throughout all the common things people may wonder about you as a birth father because you matter. 

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Samara Wiley is a published author of poetry, essays, and an environmental children’s storybook called, Waiting for the Water Fairy. She graduated from Benedictine University in 2018 with a double Bachelor of Arts in English Literature and French. She has been published in three small poetry anthologies one was called Talented.

Her other writing accomplishments include: winning a high school poetry competition and $2500 for her high school, having two out of her five novels be considered for publication, and writing movie critic reviews for her university’s newsletter.

Although she has Cerebral Palsy and has had a turbulent childhood, Samara puts these small specs of herself into her writing to personally connect with her audience. She prides herself on pushing the boundaries in her writing and in her personal life with everything she does. Samara writes with her heart and a voice of compassion and loves to pull from her top passions in life.

She currently lives in Yorkville, Illinois with her mom and two sisters.

Birth Father Birth Mother Blog

Celebrating Father’s Day During an Adoption

Celebrating Father’s Day During an Adoption

Father’s Day is coming up. It’s a holiday that celebrates the contributions and acknowledges the struggles of fatherhood for all fatherly figures. Fun fact, Father’s Day was first celebrated in June 1910 after a push from a woman named Sonora Smart Dodd. It was then first recognized federally by former President Richard Nixon. The day has a storied history, and birth fathers can celebrate too! It may feel strange to take time for you and your partner while there is always so much to do, but we believe you absolutely deserve some time to celebrate. Adoption Choices of Missouri loves birth fathers and their contributions to families. Here’s just a few ways you can celebrate Father’s Day during an adoption.

  • Get the Birth Father a Thoughtful Gift

Who doesn’t love a good gift? A gift doesn’t have to be expensive or fancy. Your partner will appreciate any gift knowing that you got it for them specifically. Maybe it’s as big as a date to a restaurant or as small as a simple letter. A gift can also be an act of kindness. Take a turn doing one of his least favorite chores. He will appreciate the extra help.

  • Seeing Your Child Post-Adoption

If you opted for an open adoption, you and your partner could visit the baby after their birth. Seeing your baby happy and healthy after the birth is a nice reassurance that the baby is doing just fine. The birth father also will get to talk to the adoptive family and feel secure in your decision to put your baby up for adoption.

  • Visit a Museum

Is your partner a history buff? Or maybe he is a big fan of art or science? Whatever his interests are, try and find an interesting museum to visit. Not only is a museum a great place for a date, but it’s also a fun way to learn a little more about certain topics. Many local histories and art museums are even free or almost free to visit any time. It’ll be a fun way to spend an afternoon celebrating your partner’s interests.

  • Have Some Fun at Home

Going out is great, but sometimes it’s nice to stay in for the holiday. If you have had an old puzzle that has been lying around dying to get finished, now’s the time to bust it out and get to work on it. If you have a deck of cards, see if you can find some rules online for a new game to learn. Enjoy board games like chess or checkers? Father’s Day is the perfect opportunity to sit down and play.

There’s no stay-at-home activity quite like sitting down and watching a movie. Some fathers may like different ideas. Maybe for you, Father’s Day is watching his favorite movie together for the 1,000th time. You could also find a new movie to watch.

  • Get Some Quality Time Together

Sometimes it feels as if everyone is busy all the time. Especially during the adoption process, it can feel almost impossible to carve out some time out of your schedule. This Father’s Day, try to take some time specifically for quality time this year. Go out to a park if the weather’s nice and have a simple little picnic. Go out to eat somewhere you have wanted to go for ages. Or maybe just stay in and cook for the birth father. Whatever it takes to get some quality time, it’ll be worth it to spend some good time with each other.

  • Make and Work on a Bucket List

Father’s Day should be a break from finding unplanned pregnancy options. Making a list of stuff you and your partner want to do reminds you of what’s good in life. Be sure to have achievable goals alongside your lofty ones on your bucket list. Staying at a fancy hotel is a fun goal, but maybe going fishing is a bit more realistic within the next few months. Has your partner wanted to try using that grill in storage but never learned how? Add it to the bucket list! These lists will help keep you motivated and excited for the days to come.

Celebrating Father’s Day during an adoption with the Birth Father in Missouri

Adoption Choices of Missouri wants you and your partner to have a great time celebrating Father’s Day during an adoption. As you work through the adoption process, it’s good to acknowledge and appreciate the birth father’s contributions. Try giving your father a thoughtful gift or visiting a museum this Father’s Day. Watch a movie at home or go have a picnic to spend some quality time together. Make a bucket list to see if you can knock anything off of it. And if you ever want more help with the adoption process or talking to birth fathers, you can give us as call or check out our website at Adoption Choices of Missouri.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Joshua Boulet Meet the author: Joshua Boulet is an aspiring journalist and writer with a particular fondness for research and social sciences. He loves music, writing, reading, video games and most art, and anything creative he can get his hands on. Boulet believes that there’s too much good stuff out there and not enough time to see it all. He grew up on video games: the classic Sonic the Hedgehog games, Mario Kart, Marvel Ultimate Alliance, and Legend of Zelda. The music of rhythm games led him to an interest in that, and the investigative journalism of Jason Schreier inspired him to discover the importance of journalism as an industry. That interest in developers’ lives led him to an interest in social justice and how the world could maybe be made into a better place. “All this to say, there is certainly a line I can draw between me obsessively playing Sonic the Hedgehog 2 and me interviewing my sociology professor about how to read academic articles. Those surprising through lines fascinate me all the same. At my best, I’m a person who gets to be constantly fascinated by the lives and work of other people.” His favorite quote is from his favorite jazz musician: “A genius is the one most like himself” – Thelonious Monk.

 

Birth Mother Blog

Everything a Birth Mother Needs to Know About Choosing LGBTQ+ Adoptive Parents in Missouri

Everything a Birth Mother Needs to Know About Choosing LGBTQ+ Adoptive Parents in Missouri

Are you a birth mother open to the idea of placing your baby with an LGBTQ+ adoptive family? Or maybe it was an option you had not considered, but you are fine with it as long as your baby is placed in a safe and loving home? Well, look no further! You have come to the right place. Adoption Choices of Missouri encourages diversity and welcomes people from all walks of life. Our adoption specialists are here to help you every step of the way through your adoption journey. This means that we will gladly answer all of your questions about what it means to choose LGBTQ+ adoptive parents.

Top 5 Reasons Why Birth Mothers in Missouri Should Consider Placing Your Baby with a Same-sex Adoptive Family

 When considering adoption, keep in mind that you, as the birth mother, have the opportunity to pick out the adoptive family you would like to place your child with. Do you need help figuring out how to choose an adoptive family in Missouri? Think carefully, and consider which adoption family criteria are important to you.

Are you open to a single-parent adoptive home, or do you prefer a two-parent home? What if those two parents were a same-sex couple? Or what if they were a different race than your child in a transracial adoption? Do any of those things bother you, or do you just want to make sure that your baby will be well-cared for? While you consider all of these different factors, let’s explore some of the many benefits of having same-sex couples or LGBTQ+ individuals as adoptive parents.

  1. The law is on your side; there are currently no adoption laws prohibiting same-sex couples or individuals from adopting in Missouri. In the eyes of the law in the great state of Missouri, the adoption process for same-sex couples or individuals is just about the same as it is for heterosexual parents. There are still basic criteria that must be met, like undergoing an at-home evaluation, but for the most part, the adoption process is just as easy as it would be for straight adoptive parents. There is no reason to worry about the law preventing or hindering your adoption process with LGBTQ+ adoptive parents.
  2. LGBTQ+ adoptive families are opening their homes and hearts to adoption by choosing to be parents. Sadly, many same-sex couples want children but get overlooked for adoption because of who they love. They have so much love in their hearts that they feel moved to open their homes to provide a child with a better chance in life than they had. Many same-sex couples find themselves with two incomes but no children to provide for or dote on. LGBTQ+ people can be some of the most devoted parents because they have so much love in their hearts that they are choosing to open their homes and be parents.
  3. Your baby will be placed for adoption into a loving and nurturing home, no matter what adoptive family criteria you decide on. We understand the importance of placing your child with an adoptive family you can trust. That is why we perform home studies in which we observe prospective adoptive families. We would never place your baby in a home that was not well-suited for them. We are a full-service, licensed adoption agency, so all of our adoptive families in our family portfolios are pre-screened and pre-qualified. Your baby deserves a home that is safe and nurturing. That is why we are determined to ensure that they are given a home that provides them with the love and opportunities they deserve in life.
  4. Same-sex couples and LGBTQ+ adoptive parents will instill positive values like being inclusive of others, having pride and self-respect, and celebrating diversity. When you are an LGBTQ+ person, you have to really know who you are and have a good sense of self-worth. There are so many people out in the world trying to tell you who you should love or how you should be. You have to be able to hold your head high and proudly say, “This is who I am.” You don’t just learn to love who you want outside of who society tells you to love. You learn to love yourself most of all. You learn to be more tolerant and accepting of others thanks to the people who did not tolerate or accept you. These wonderful values of inclusivity, self-respect, and acceptance will be passed on and taught to your child.
  5. LGBTQ+ adoptive parents are more progressive and receptive to smashing stereotypes and breaking the mold of the nuclear family. Have you ever heard the old adage, it takes a village to raise a child? It’s true! Let’s face it: the traditional nuclear family is a relic of the past. It’s time to make your family what you want it to be: a group of people who love and respect each other and who want what’s best for your child. Thanks to different types of adoption, like open and semi-open adoptions, you can stay involved in your child’s life and know the person that he or she grows up to be. It is up to you and the adoptive family to agree on your level of involvement beforehand when making your adoption plan, but it is possible that you can be one big, happy family. Just please be realistic and manage your expectations. Personal schedules don’t always allow for in-person visits as frequently as everyone would like. But having same-sex couple parents will help your child to navigate the new modern family that is the way of the future.

Call Our Missouri Adoption Agency Today to Learn More FAQs About Same-sex Adoptive Parents

 Don’t hesitate to call Adoption Choices of Missouri today! Our adoption specialists are ready and waiting to help you with any questions you may have. Whether you want to know more about the benefits of same-sex couple adoptions or have questions about choosing an adoptive family in general, we are here to help you find the answers. Your adoption caseworker will be able to provide more basic information as well as answer any specific questions you may have. The longer you wait to contact us, the longer before we can get to work helping you.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Kelly Felix is a graduate from the University of New Orleans. She holds a BA in English as well as a BA in Sociology. Her English concentration is in journalism, and her specialties in sociology are gender studies and environmental sociology.

When she isn’t voraciously guzzling coffee or devouring books, Kelly can be found either bent over a canvas working on her art or at her computer playing video games. She has hands-on classroom teaching experience from her time working as a substitute teacher for Kelly Services. Kelly also completed an in-house editorial internship at Pelican Publishing Company, and she finished the goal internship program at Green Light New Orleans. Kelly generally exists in a state of suspended disbelief, but when she’s not there she resides in New Orleans.

Birth Mother Blog

Pros and Cons of Same-Sex Adoption in Missouri 

Pros and Cons of Same-Sex Adoption in Missouri 

Due to being unable to have a child themselves, you may find that many of the available families looking to adopt children are LGBTQ+ couples. Vast amounts of research have shown that same-sex couples can raise children just as well as any other couple. Gay parents also tend to have far more adaptable parent roles than straight parents. No same-sex marriage is perfect, but no straight marriage is perfect either. Adoption Choices of Missouri wants to show you why so many gay parents become great adoptive family candidates. Here are some pros and cons of same-sex adoption in Missouri.

Pros for an LGBTQ+ Adoption

Same-sex couples make great adoptive families. They have lots of love to give. Children raised by gay parents excel and the parents don’t adhere to stereotypes. Here are just a few reasons why choosing a gay adoptive family may be the best option for you.

  1. Lots of Love and Acceptance

Gay couples haven’t always had the easiest time, especially in America. It wasn’t until recently that gay marriage was legal at all throughout the United States. Furthermore, gay couples deal with significantly more societal stigma and discrimination than straight couples. Sometimes gay students are bullied more at school as well. But that adversity leads to gay couples having lots of love to give. They already know how to love in the face of adversity and how to love despite what everybody else thinks. They have strong couple relationships and can form good bonds with their children. These aspects are exactly why you can be sure that a same-sex couple will love and care for your child.

Children of gay parents aren’t told that they shouldn’t do something because they’re a boy or because they’re a girl. These children learn how to carve out their own identity and pursue careers they’re interested in despite stereotypes about that field or about their own gender.  

  1. Great at Raising Children

Most gay couples cannot have an accidental pregnancy. This means that more gay parents are committed to their children than even straight parents. Gay parents have lots of compassion and a great track record for adopting children. Children from gay couples also have good self-esteem, perhaps because gay parents had to work to carve out a space in society where they fit. You can always learn more about a potential adoptive gay couple as well during the interview we’ll set up!

Gay parents also teach tolerance and acceptance to their children. By seeing an example of how people different from themselves from a young age can be kind, children learn to reserve judgment about those they don’t know. They learn that even if someone is very different from themselves, that person is still a person just the same as the rest of us. Children of gay parents also do fine at school. They perform about the same on average, but that makes sense given having gay parents probably won’t help a kid on their algebra test.

  1. Adaptable Parent Roles

In many heterosexual relationships, people tend to fall into the standard male and female roles in marriage. Many people enjoy these roles, and this works out fine, but gay parents in particular parent really well. As opposed to leaning on gender roles, gay parents pick and choose tasks based not on what is expected, but on what each parent is better at. This means that there is generally more even distribution of tasks and that both parents are likely to be very loving towards their child. In general, there is a sense that both parents act as equals in the relationship. 

  1. In Many Ways, Gay Parents are Like Straight Parents

Most of the time, gay parents are like straight parents. Both parents may be the same gender, but they have different, complementary personalities. While some may think both would play the traditional role of the father, they actually tend to split roles traditionally held by mothers and fathers. This, of course, also means that some gay parents fall into the same pitfalls as any other parents. Nevertheless, you can rest assured that all same-sex adoptive families have passed the same interviews and requirements for the adoption process as straight families. 

Cons for a LGBTQ+ Adoption

Unfortunately, not everything is so easy. Same-sex couples have challenges like everybody else, and here is a little bit of what you may expect to see.

  1. Societal Stigma Towards Gay Marriage

In spite of the progress made in the past couple of e decades, there is still stigma towards gay couples in the United States. Depending on where you live or the dominant religions in those areas, gay parents have to deal with far more judgment than straight parents. This can mean a more difficult time finding parent support groups and for transgender or non-binary parents, and a more difficult time finding healthcare. Many states also have failed to update their anti-discrimination policies to include LGBTQ+ people. 

Giving Baby up for Adoption? Same-Sex Parents are a Great Choice

Adoption Choices of Missouri want you to be well informed in choosing the right adoptive parent, that is why we want you to know the pros and cons of same-sex adoption. We supports same-sex and LGBTQ+ couples because we’ve seen positive outcomes from these families. Gay parents foster love and acceptance in the family. They also teach their kids how to be kind and accepting towards others. Gay parents also are great at sharing leadership roles and responsibilities in the family. But just like any other family, some couples deal with tough challenges and societal stigma. If you’re interested in choosing a same-sex couple as an adoptive family, get in touch with one of our adoption caseworkers today. 

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Joshua Boulet Meet the author: Joshua Boulet is an aspiring journalist and writer with a particular fondness for research and social sciences. He loves music, writing, reading, video games and most art, and anything creative he can get his hands on. Boulet believes that there’s too much good stuff out there and not enough time to see it all. He grew up on video games: the classic Sonic the Hedgehog games, Mario Kart, Marvel Ultimate Alliance, and Legend of Zelda. The music of rhythm games led him to an interest in that, and the investigative journalism of Jason Schreier inspired him to discover the importance of journalism as an industry. That interest in developers’ lives led him to an interest in social justice and how the world could maybe be made into a better place. “All this to say, there is certainly a line I can draw between me obsessively playing Sonic the Hedgehog 2 and me interviewing my sociology professor about how to read academic articles. Those surprising through lines fascinate me all the same. At my best, I’m a person who gets to be constantly fascinated by the lives and work of other people.” His favorite quote is from his favorite jazz musician: “A genius is the one most like himself” – Thelonious Monk.

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