unplanned pregnancy
Birth Mother Blog

Putting My Baby up for Adoption in Missouri

May 24, 2021

Putting My Baby up for Adoption in Missouri

Unplanned pregnancy? Here at Adoption Choices of Missouri adoption agency, we want to provide everything we can to help you with a successful adoption. we’ve got you covered. Adoption is a kinder alternative that allows you to have a say in where your baby goes after your pregnancy. Our caseworkers will make sure you understand every step of the adoption process. When adoption paperwork or an adoption attorney is needed, we handle all the tough complications to keep you focused on what’s most important. When you’re ready to choose an adoptive family, we’ll have a variety of options ready.

Are You Considering Adoption in Missouri?

Of course, the beginning is the best place to start. Once you and your adoption caseworker set up a meeting, you can start defining the details of the adoption. Paperwork, sadly, is an essential part of this process. However, with the help of your adoption caseworker, you don’t have to worry if you’re accidentally messing something up. Completing the initial paperwork will allow you the most freedom to decide where your child goes after birth as well.

Another critical part that your caseworker will help with is finding a doctor. A doctor provides the best solution to make sure both you and your baby stay happy and healthy during your pregnancy. Tests, screenings, and ultrasounds can be a bit intimidating, but your caseworker will help ease your fears if you’re anxious about a visit. Once you’ve gone to the doctor and learned what is best for you and your baby, you may find you have a better understanding of why you chose adoption.

Finding the Right Financial Assistances To Begin Your Adoption Journey

One of the most troubling thoughts for a birth parent is, “will I be able to pay for this?” Doctor’s visits, maternity clothes, transportation, and time lost at work all contribute to a loss of financial security. For some birth mothers, they never had that financial security in the first place. To help these parents, Adoption Choices helps provide you with financial resources and matches you with state monetary assistance as well. Putting your baby up for adoption always comes at absolutely no cost to you, the birth parent. With helping you comes helping you get the healthcare you need too. We can help provide transportation and shelter during and for some time after your pregnancy as well. All of these programs are catered to your needs, so even if circumstances change during your pregnancy, we still have got you covered.

Matching Your Child with an Adoptive Family

We make sure every single adoptive family is thoroughly vetted and loving adoptive family. We also know, though, that you may like to get a say in which adoptive family is matched with your child. If you choose an open adoption, we have a variety of candidates available for you to learn about and maybe even meet.

We have a wonderful variety of adoptive parents who would be thrilled for the opportunity to raise a child. If you’re unsure about the options presented by your caseworker, we can bring more options to the table as well.  If you would rather not pick, we can choose a loving adoptive family for you. No matter the family, you can rest assured your child will be well taken care of.

Remember to Practice Self-Care During the Adoption Process

Once all the details are taken care of and we’ve found a great adoptive family for your child, it’s time to take an extra breather. The doctor’s visits, paperwork, and choices are enough to exhaust anybody who isn’t also pregnant. There is no need to be tired and stressed out for your entire pregnancy. Use your time to take a breather. Talk to your doctor about good ways to take care of yourself physically and mentally.

Have a specific craving for waffles? No one’s going to blame you for just getting store-bought ones. If you’ve been itching to bake some cookies, now is the time to try it out. If you can, be sure to take some time to talk to other people as well. There are plenty of online and in-person pregnancy support groups that we can help you get in touch with.

Working with Our Adoption Agency in Missouri

Putting your baby up for adoption is a great choice for you and your child, and Adoption Choices of Missouri wants to help you do that. Our adoption caseworkers will help you sort out all the complicated details to get you started and provide you with financial assistance. We also match you with adoptive families for you to meet with to keep you feeling secure in your child’s future.  We want to make sure that you get some rest and stay healthy while waiting for your due date.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Joshua Boulet Meet the author: Joshua Boulet is an aspiring journalist and writer with a particular fondness for research and social sciences. He loves music, writing, reading, video games and most art, and anything creative he can get his hands on. Boulet believes that there’s too much good stuff out there and not enough time to see it all. He grew up on video games: the classic Sonic the Hedgehog games, Mario Kart, Marvel Ultimate Alliance, and Legend of Zelda. The music of rhythm games led him to an interest in that, and the investigative journalism of Jason Schreier inspired him to discover the importance of journalism as an industry. That interest in developers’ lives led him to an interest in social justice and how the world could maybe be made into a better place. “All this to say, there is certainly a line I can draw between me obsessively playing Sonic the Hedgehog 2 and me interviewing my sociology professor about how to read academic articles. Those surprising through lines fascinate me all the same. At my best, I’m a person who gets to be constantly fascinated by the lives and work of other people.” His favorite quote is from his favorite jazz musician: “A genius is the one most like himself” – Thelonious Monk.

 

single mother adoption MO
Birth Mother Blog

Choosing a Single Woman to Adopt Your Baby in Missouri

May 21, 2021

Choosing a Single Woman to Adopt Your Baby in Missouri

Choosing the adoptive family that will raise your child can be a very difficult decision to make. It is important to know that you have a lot of options when it comes to the types of family you can choose from. One option to consider is a single parent. If you are thinking about choosing a single parent to adopt your baby in Missouri, then you might be wondering if a single parent can handle raising a child on their own. Are there even any advantages to choosing a single parent to adopt your child? Aside from allowing a single woman to experience the joy of motherhood, your child will also receive the benefits that being raised by a single parent can provide: They will earn responsibility and independence by watching their parents. They will also still be able to have a strong support system and receive all of their undivided attention and love. Adoption Choices of Missouri is here for you if you to tailor your adoption plan if you are considering choosing a single woman to adopt your baby in Missouri.

Exposure to Independence and Responsibility

Single parents are often very responsible and independent. They usually have to tackle many things during the week, such as work, grocery shopping, and other errands. A single parent has to do all that and still set time aside to spend with their child. Know that if you choose a single parent to adopt your child, they will grow up watching their parents budget their time and work hard to get everything done. Your child will learn from observing the value of being a responsible adult.

Because single parenting is a busy affair, and since a single parent usually works, they cannot spend every moment of their time with their child. This just means that your child will learn to be more independent at a younger age. They may have to learn how to help prepare dinner or help out with other tasks around the house. Choosing a single woman to parent your child just means that your child will learn to rely less on their parents and more on themselves as they grow.

Exposure to a Support System

Simply because a single parent is raising your child does not mean that the single parent is the only person they can rely on.  Single parents will usually reach out to friends and family and even organizations designed specifically for single parents. Seeing their parent ask for help from different groups of people teaches them to use their resources to connect with others and to also not be afraid to seek help if they need it. Know that your child will grow up with access to a strong and loving support system.

Undivided Attention

If you choose a single woman to parent your child, know that they will have that parent’s undivided attention and love. Single parents are likely to develop a deep bond with their children because they can spend time with their child one on one. A strong bond must be created between a parent and child so that the child can feel safe, heard, and have a sense of belonging. Single parent and child relationships tend to have an advantage when it comes to this. Because they spend so much time with their child, and their child spends so much time with them, the parent can get to understand and know their child on a deeper level. This allows them to better guide their child through his or her life.

Allow a Single Woman to Experience the Joy of Motherhood

If you choose a single woman to raise your child, know that you are giving her an opportunity that she thought she might never have. She now gets to raise and love a child of her own. Sometimes a birth mother might overlook a single woman as a viable option for your adoption process. Don’t count single women out. If you give her a chance, you will find that she will raise your child with all of the love she has to give.

Are you Ready To Choose a Single Woman to Adopt Your Baby in Missouri?

Choosing the best family to raise your child can be difficult, but choosing a single woman to adopt your baby has many benefits. Your child will be exposed to responsibility and independence from a young age. They will also have a strong support network and have the adoptive parent’s undivided attention. The choice of whether or not to choose a single parent or other types of families to raise your child is completely up to you. Only you can know what is right for you and your baby. Adoption Choices of Missouri is here for you.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Heather Frederick is in her fourth and final year at Siena College and lives in Delmar, New York. She is completing her BFA in English and has written several plays, The Vagabond, Paneless, and Yours, for the Oppressed. On most days, you can find her in the kitchen baking and singing to show tunes. 

As a member of the BTS Army, she likes to spend time listening to Kpop and learning dance choreography.

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Birth Mother Blog

What Adoption Choices Adoption of Missouri Can Do for You

May 19, 2021

What Adoption Choices Adoption of Missouri Can Do for You

Even if you live in the most rural parts of Missouri, Adoption Choices of Missouri is here to help. Sometimes the best choice to give your child the care they deserve is adoption. That’s why we offer a variety of services and resources for birth mothers looking to put their baby up for adoption. We care about our birth mothers, so we provide financial assistance, various types of adoptions, and years of experience working with mothers to you all for free.

Remember, you can always call or text one of our adoption counselors with no commitment at 816-527-9800 or message us online.

Financial assistance

Our Missouri adoption agency provides for a variety of financial needs during your pregnancy. Your adoption counselor will help you figure out exactly what your needs are and how they can assist you with your current financial situation.

If you’re homeless, we can provide money for rent and utilities and help you find affordable housing. We also provide help with transportation and medical bills to make sure you never miss important doctor’s appointments.

Especially pregnant women need plenty of food, so we provide assistance for groceries as well. Find that none of your clothes fit quite right anymore? We can help provide maternity clothes too. Whatever your financial needs are, we’re committed to helping you meet them.

Types of adoptions

Adoption Choices of Missouri offers a few different types of adoptions: open adoptions, semi-open adoptions, and closed adoptions. Most parents participate in an open adoption in the U.S. The birth parents and adoptive parents share identifying contact information, and they likely will even meet in person. This is a great option for most people, and Adoption Choices will help you choose a birth family you feel comfortable raising your baby. In a closed adoption, the birth and adoptive parents don’t meet and usually know little to nothing about each other. These are uncommon in domestic adoptions, but Adoption Choices does offer this as an option. Finally, semi-open adoptions have some contact with specific rules between the sets of parents. Sometimes this means not sharing identifying information or only sharing photos through a third-party mediator. Whichever option you choose for your pregnancy, Adoption Choices has got you covered.

We bring our years of experience with adoption to you

Our staff is all thoroughly familiar with both the adoption process and the needs of birth mothers. Executive director Amy Bryant acted as a Child Placement Supervisor since 2015 and is a licensed social worker with a master’s degree in social work. Kate Fibert, social services director, has been here since 2017 and earned her master’s in 2018 along with a clinical license. Child placement supervisor Heather Brown got to raise a foster child of her own and worked for several years as a reintegration/adoption contractor. She earned a degree in social work in 2017 and continues to raise her four children.

Adoption case manager Brandy Johnson worked for nine years with pregnant women and children. Between our team of passionate mothers and people with a passion for helping mothers, we have all the training and experience to give you the care you deserve.

Birth parent counselors at our adoption agency Missouri

During every step of the process, our birth parent counselors offer their experience and assistance. First, they help you fill out all the paperwork you need to get financial assistance. Then, they educate you on the adoption process and make sure you understand what’s happening at every stage. Then they help you find choices for good adoptive families who are all thoroughly screened and interviewed by social workers. Before your due date, your counselor helps you develop a hospital plan to make that stay comfortable. And perhaps most importantly, counselors help you navigate the legal side of putting your baby up for adoption and arrange for an attorney as well.

A compassionate adoption process

At Adoption Choices, we know how hard the adoption process can be for you and your family. Birth mother counselors provide material support, but they also provide emotional support for you. Adoption Choices only helps as many mothers as we can so we can guarantee a high quality of care for each and every mother we serve.

What Adoption Choices of Missouri Can Offer You

We offer a variety of services for birth mothers and adoptive families here at Adoption Choices of Missouri. We make sure you get matched with the financial assistance you need to keep you and your baby safe. We offer several types of adoptions in Missouri depending on your needs and preferences. Throughout our staff, we have years of experience parenting and helping other parents to keep their kids safe. In addition, our counselors will give educational and emotional support to make sure you feel cared for during the entire adoption process.

If you’re a birth mother, you can text or call 816-527-9800 with any questions or fill out our online form.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Joshua Boulet Meet the author: Joshua Boulet is an aspiring journalist and writer with a particular fondness for research and social sciences. He loves music, writing, reading, video games and most art, and anything creative he can get his hands on. Boulet believes that there’s too much good stuff out there and not enough time to see it all. He grew up on video games: the classic Sonic the Hedgehog games, Mario Kart, Marvel Ultimate Alliance, and Legend of Zelda. The music of rhythm games led him to an interest in that, and the investigative journalism of Jason Schreier inspired him to discover the importance of journalism as an industry. That interest in developers’ lives led him to an interest in social justice and how the world could maybe be made into a better place. “All this to say, there is certainly a line I can draw between me obsessively playing Sonic the Hedgehog 2 and me interviewing my sociology professor about how to read academic articles. Those surprising through lines fascinate me all the same. At my best, I’m a person who gets to be constantly fascinated by the lives and work of other people.”

His favorite quote is from his favorite jazz musician:
“A genius is the one most like himself” – Thelonious Monk.

Birth Mother Blog

Important Adoption Terms to Know During Your Unplanned Pregnancy

May 18, 2021

Important Adoption Terms to Know During Your Unplanned Pregnancy

There’s an old children’s rhyme that goes, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me.” Except that, sometimes, words can hurt us. Words can hurt when people repeatedly say your name wrong or don’t even bother to learn your correct pronouns. That’s how some women or adoptive families feel during the adoption process when they are called by the wrong title. What an awkward social faux-pas! It’s important to make sure that we are using the right language to refer to people, especially when it comes to adoption. We want to refer to people correctly so that we can be as inclusive as possible. It is important to us that everyone from all walks of life feels welcome at our adoption agency. That is precisely why Adoption Choices of Missouri is here to help you navigate this new and exciting vocabulary and learn what are the important adoption terms being used today.

How Adoption Agencies in Missouri Distinguish Between the Different Terms Used for a Birth Mother

  1. Pregnant Woman. In the world of adoption, the term pregnant woman refers to any woman who is pregnant and considering adoption. While she may be considering placing her baby for adoption, she has not yet fully chosen adoption as her pregnancy option. She may be considering this quietly to herself, or she may have already confided in a few people she trusts. The important thing to know is that a pregnant woman is still weighing her options and considering adoption.
  2. Expectant Mother. When it comes to adoption, an expectant mother is a woman who is pregnant but is not yet considering adoption. The thought of adoption may have crossed her mind as she looked into her pregnancy options, but she is not seriously considering placing her baby for adoption yet.
  3. Biological Mom. Most commonly referred to in surrogacy cases, a biological mom is one of the parents from whom the baby receives half of his or her DNA. This may or may not also be the mom who is giving birth. Sometimes in adoptions, the birth mother also likes to be referred to as a biological mom. After all, it is technically correct and does have a nice superhero ring to it. Is that a bird? Is it a plane? No, it’s Bio Mom!
  4. Birth Mother. A birth mother is a pregnant woman who has already chosen adoption and is ready to begin her adoption journey. She has explored all of her pregnancy options and decided that adoption is the best course of action for her and her baby. If you are a birth mother who has chosen adoption, all you have to do now is contact our adoption agency so that we can help you begin making your adoption plan.

Why It Is Important to Know the Subtle Differences Between Each Term When Placing Your Baby for Adoption in Missouri

Some seemingly innocuous names used to refer to birth mothers or biological moms can actually feel negative or harmful to them or the adoptive families. Words like, “natural parent,” “real parents,” or “real mom” imply that the adoptive family is unnatural or isn’t a real family, and that is simply not the case. It is best to prevent offending or hurting anyone by avoiding these phrases altogether.

We understand the importance of making sure that everyone feels valued and included. That is why we like to say that our birth mothers place their baby for adoption versus giving up their baby for adoption. Remember, you are never “giving up” when you choose adoption. Adoption is a selfless act of love by sacrificing your parenthood in order to give your baby the best opportunities in life.

If you choose open adoption as your type of adoption, it is crucial to make sure that you actively continue to use the right nomenclature so that no one gets upset or hurt. You, your baby, and the adoptive family will be in each other’s lives for a long time, so it’s important that you start your relationship together off right. It is important that we are clear and direct in the language we use so that everyone feels welcome, like one big, happy family.

By using exact and meaningful vocabulary to refer to people, we can avoid making someone feel left out. Especially if that someone is you, your child, or a member of your child’s adoptive family.

If You Are Considering Adoption, Don’t Wait to Call Our Missouri Adoption Agency Today to Receive Unplanned Pregnancy Help

Maybe you are an expectant mother who was not considering adoption until you found this article. Perhaps you are a pregnant woman who has not yet chosen adoption but is interested in learning more. Or maybe you are a biological mom or birth mother who has chosen adoption and is ready to begin your adoption process. No matter what step of your adoption journey you are on, Adoption Choices of Missouri is ready and waiting to help assist you. Our adoption caseworkers are on standby to begin working on your behalf. Contact us today so that we can begin helping you with your adoption plan as soon as possible.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Kelly Felix is a graduate from the University of New Orleans. She holds a BA in English as well as a BA in Sociology. Her English concentration is in journalism, and her specialties in sociology are gender studies and environmental sociology.

When she isn’t voraciously guzzling coffee or devouring books, Kelly can be found either bent over a canvas working on her art or at her computer playing video games. She has hands-on classroom teaching experience from her time working as a substitute teacher for Kelly Services. Kelly also completed an in-house editorial internship at Pelican Publishing Company, and she finished the goal internship program at Green Light New Orleans. Kelly generally exists in a state of suspended disbelief, but when she’s not there she resides in New Orleans.

 

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Birth Mother Blog

The Top 5 Things Birth Mothers in Missouri Want You to Know About Adoption

May 17, 2021

The Top 5 Things Birth Mothers in Missouri Want You to Know About Adoption

As an expectant mother who is just beginning your adoption journey. Like a new birth mother, you might feel out of your depth about everything surrounding your adoption process if you have any questions or concerns about the adoption process and may be wondering who to ask. We at Adoption Choices of Missouri have listed the top five things a local Missouri birth mother wants you to know, to help you understand your choice of adoption. Here are the top five things birth mothers in Missouri want you to know.

Things Birth Mothers in Missouri Want You to Know About Adoption

  1. You will Always Have Support
    At our agency, Adoption Choices of Missouri, your adoption caseworker will help you find birth mother emotional support, counseling support, and birth mother retreats to help you feel connected to your adoption journey and understand your role as a birth mother and to know that you are a cherished part of your child’s life. You are never alone and will always have the support of other birth mothers who understand what it might feel like going through your adoption process and the mixed emotions that come with not raising your child. As a birth mother, your child will hold you close to their heart. No matter if you are near or far in the state of Missouri, you will always be their birth mother. 
  2. Your Opinion Matters
    As a birth mother, you should know that your opinion matters. You are in control of your adoption decisions from pre-placement to post-placement. You pick out your child’s adoptive parents and decide what you want during your birth plan and post-placement. No matter what anyone says, you, as your child’s birth mother, play a major role in his or her life.
  3. Embrace your Adoption Emotions
    As an expectant mother who will soon become a future birth mother, you might experience many emotions, like sadness, guilt, fear, relief, and this is perfectly okay. Choosing adoption is such a difficult but rewarding decision that comes with many emotions you may feel as your adoption progress moves forward as it becomes finalized. Over the days, months, and even years, don’t hide your feelings; embrace the good and bad days because you are still a mother who is grieving the loss of a child. To embrace your adoption emotions is a great big step to accept your choice of adoption.
  4. Keep Communication Open
    Going through your adoption, remember, communication is one of the most important things in your adoption plan. Communicate with your birth parent caseworker if you need help making a list of questions and concerns for the adoptive parents so that you feel heard during your adoption process; your adoption caseworker can assist you with this. Open communication, whether by phone call, email, or video chat, with your child and their adoptive parents will let them know how involved you want to be in your child’s life. In addition, this might help you, your child, and your child’s adoptive parent’s bond grows stronger.
  5. You will Have a Second Mother’s Day
    As a birth mother, you get a special Mother’s Day dedicated to you. Birth Mother’s Day celebrates you as a birth mother. Birth Mother’s Day was on Friday, May 8th, the Friday before Mother’s day. As a future birth mother, you need to know that you will always celebrate this day with your child any way you wish. As a birth mother, you might be flooded with many emotions on this day, as this can bring up many emotions from the day your child was born. You also might get to celebrate this holiday not only with your birth child but with your child’s adoptive mother as well to make it extra special. Remember, this is your day to feel loved and appreciated by your birth child and in your choice to choose adoption.

Advice for New Birth Mothers

Going through an adoption process as a new birth mother may seem hard, and you might not know where to turn. However, with the help of our agency, Adoption Choices of Missouri, you can have guidance and support from other birth mothers who have gone through the same experience. Having a birth mother who will help you get through your adoption journey might help you feel more prepared as your adoption moves along and your adoption story can end up as a positive experience.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Samara Wiley is a published author of poetry, essays, and an environmental children’s storybook called, Waiting for the Water Fairy. She graduated from Benedictine University in 2018 with a double Bachelor of Arts in English Literature and French. She has been published in three small poetry anthologies one was called Talented.

Her other writing accomplishments include: winning a high school poetry competition and $2500 for her high school, having two out of her five novels be considered for publication, and writing movie critic reviews for her university’s newsletter.

Although she has Cerebral Palsy and has had a turbulent childhood, Samara puts these small specs of herself into her writing to personally connect with her audience. She prides herself on pushing the boundaries in her writing and in her personal life with everything she does. Samara writes with her heart and a voice of compassion and loves to pull from her top passions in life. She currently lives in Yorkville, Illinois with her mom and two sisters.

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Birth Mother Blog

The Top 5 Frequently Asked Adoption Questions Adoptees have for Birth Mothers

May 14, 2021

The Top 5 Frequently Asked Adoption Questions Adoptees have the Birth Mothers

As a birth mother, your birth child might be curious about their birth family or identity. Now, adoption is a beautiful choice, but it comes with some hard and personal questions that you might have to answer even years from now. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we have listed the five frequently asked questions that you, a birth mother, might be asked by your birth child someday. Here are the top five frequently asked questions adoptees have for their birth mothers.

Top 5 Frequently Asked Questions Adoptees have the Birth Mothers

  1. Why Did You Place Me Up For Adoption?Many might find this to be a loaded question. You might tell your child that you were young and unprepared to be a mother during this time in your life. Or you may not have been financially stable to parent a child– whatever the reason behind your choice to place your child up for adoption, know that your child might understand someday and that they will still love you regardless.
  2. Are You and My Birth Father Together?As a birth mother, your child may be wondering if you and their birth father are still together or how your relationship unfolded after you became pregnant. You can expect a question like this. It’s only natural for your child to be curious about you and their birth father and the circumstances surrounding their adoption. When answering this question, be honest with them and let them know whatever details you feel comfortable with. If this is something you are not ready to share now, you can always let them know you will tell them to know when they are older. Knowing about your relationship with their birth father might help them better understand that time in your life later on.
  3. What is my Birth Heritage?As a birth mother, speaking to your child about biological heritage and where they come from is an important question. It helps your child feel connected to their cultural roots and heritage traditions that are particular to their birth family. Replying to these questions in a heartwarming way will allow your child to learn more about you and where they come from to help them gain a part of their biological identity.
  4. Do I Have Any Birth Siblings?Answering this question might stir up some mixed emotions for you as you may be feeling a bit of guilt for having children later in your life while not being able to take care of your birth child. Your child might ask this question as they want to know more about their birth family and the people who look like them. Answering this question might be easy or difficult for you if you are experiencing any post-adoption emotions, and that’s perfectly okay; it just means taking your time to introduce everyone to each other. Any information you can provide to your birth child about their siblings will make them happy.
  5. Was Your Adoption Decision Met With Support?Having a support system during your adoption process is important because you are going through one of the hardest but rewarding times of your life, you will be a birth mother and need help learning and preparing for your unborn child in the early months. As a birth mother who chose adoption, explaining to your child the many reasons you decided on adoption is important to remember. Whether you are a teenage or adult birthmother, you deserve the support you want and need from a parent, partner, friend; you will have someone there to lend an arm, shoulder, or whatever you need to support you during this time, as you are never alone.

Advice to Birth Mothers Answering Adoption Questions

The five frequently asked questions listed above might be asked to you by your child, along with many more.  These questions are for your child’s benefit to help him or they understand the two sides of the same coin— On one side, they have their adoption journey, and on the other side, they have the story before their birth.   Adoption Choices of Missouri, our adoption agency, is here to help you as a birth mother prepare to answer these and many more adoption questions your birth child may have because their birth child’s story matters.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Samara Wiley is a published author of poetry, essays, and an environmental children’s storybook called, Waiting for the Water Fairy. She graduated from Benedictine University in 2018 with a double Bachelor of Arts in English Literature and French. She has been published in three small poetry anthologies one was called Talented.

Her other writing accomplishments include: winning a high school poetry competition and $2500 for her high school, having two out of her five novels be considered for publication, and writing movie critic reviews for her university’s newsletter.

Although she has Cerebral Palsy and has had a turbulent childhood, Samara puts these small specs of herself into her writing to personally connect with her audience. She prides herself on pushing the boundaries in her writing and in her personal life with everything she does. Samara writes with her heart and a voice of compassion and loves to pull from her top passions in life.

She currently lives in Yorkville, Illinois with her mom and two sisters.

 

adoption misconceptions MO
Birth Mother Blog

Five of the Most Common Adoption Misconceptions about Birth Mothers in Missouri

May 12, 2021

Five of the Most Common Adoption Misconceptions about Birth Mothers in Missouri

If you are a woman facing an unplanned pregnancy and considering adoption, you probably already have to deal with people in your life making assumptions about you. You may even have some incorrect adoption expectations yourself. That is exactly why Adoption Choices of Missouri is here to help you navigate your unplanned pregnancy. Your adoption specialist will work with you to help you break free of all those common adoption misconceptions.

The Top 5 Most Common Adoption Misconceptions about Birth Mothers in Missouri

  1. The most common adoption stereotype: the unwed pregnant teenager. While there are still many unwed teenagers facing an unwanted pregnancy, many of the birth mothers who choose adoption are neither underage nor unmarried. In fact, many birth mothers who choose adoption are married women in their late 20’s or early 30’s. Many of these women already have children and families but cannot handle the financial strain, time constraints, or simply just don’t have enough energy to raise another baby.Whether you are a pregnant teenager or are already a mom in your 30’s, it is no one’s business but your own why you are choosing adoption. Even if you are a pregnant teenager seeking help for your unexpected pregnancy, that’s OK too! Whatever your reason for choosing adoption is, it is a perfectly good and valid reason.
  2. That closed adoptions are the most common type of adoption. A closed adoption is when the birth mother does not leave any identifying contact information with the adoptive family. It is usually the stereotype that goes hand in hand with the unwed pregnant teenager. But this is far from the truth. Open adoptions are actually the most common type of adoption in the U.S. today. In an open adoption, birth mothers, their baby, and the adoptive family keep in touch with each other throughout the years. This takes place through phone calls, texts and emails, and even in-person visits. Our adoption agency in Missouri strongly encourages open adoptions because we believe that they keep everyone’s best interests at heart.
  3. When people say that you are “giving up” your baby for adoption instead of “placing” or “putting up” your baby for adoption. One of the most common adoption misconceptions about birth mothers in Missouri is that birth mothers are giving up by choosing adoption. Please remember that adoption is not giving up. Instead, you are doing the opposite by performing a caring and selfless act of love on your part for the benefit of your baby. After all, what is a more noble act than you sacrificing your gift of parenthood for the wellbeing of your baby? That is why we like to say that our birth mothers place their baby for adoption instead of saying “giving up” your baby for adoption.
  4. That there are no resources or financial assistance for birth mothers. Of course, we provide resources for our birth mothers! That is one of the main reasons why our adoption agency even exists in the first place! Our adoption agency is a full-service, licensed adoption agency. This means that we offer a variety of financial assistance for birth mothers. This financial assistance covers things like transportation costs, living expenses, medical care, emotional support resources, and even legal representation.
  5. That it’s easy for birth mothers to “just move on” after the adoption process is completed. This one is simply not true. Most birth mothers find themselves facing some sort of grief over the loss of parenthood that accompanies adoption. This is exactly why our adoption agency provides post-placement resources like emotional support counseling. We value our birth mothers, and this means providing support and a shoulder to cry on even after the adoption process is completed.

If You Need Unexpected Pregnancy Help, Don’t Hesitate to Call 

The sooner you call us, the quicker our adoption caseworkers at Adoption Choices of Missouri can get to work helping you. Whether you need help answering basic adoption questions or help to deal with the most common adoption misconceptions about birth mothers in Missouri, our adoption agency is ready and waiting to help you today. Do not wait too long to begin making your adoption plan. Our adoption specialists are on standby to begin helping you with your adoption plan as soon as possible.

MO birth mothers want you to know adoption
Birth Mother Blog

5 Things Birth Mothers Want Missouri Adoptive Families to Know

May 10, 2021

5 Things Birth Mothers Want Missouri Adoptive Families to Know

Choosing to place her baby up for adoption is a very difficult decision for any pregnant woman to make, but it is also a selfless and courageous one. Not everyone is ready to start a family, and it can be difficult to admit that. However, if a pregnant woman knows that adoption is best for her and her baby, she is amazingly strong for making that choice. It shows that she deeply loves and cares for her child and that she is putting her baby’s needs above her own. If you are considering becoming an adoptive family in Missouri, you might be wondering what it is like for birth mothers in the adoption process. What thoughts and emotions are going through their head in this process? Is there anything I, the adoptive parent, should know about birth mothers? Adoption Choices of Missouri is here to tell you the 5 things Birth Mothers want Missouri Adoptive Families to Know.

  1. A Birth Mother Does not Choose Adoption Because her Child is Unwanted

A birth mother chooses adoption because she wants what is best for her child. She does not choose adoption because she doesn’t want her child. Choosing adoption is a very difficult decision for birth mothers, and a lot of thought and care goes into making this decision. A birth mother admits that she is not ready to care for a child at this time and instead chooses to go through all of the unknowns that come with pregnancy to give her child the best life she possibly can. As an adoptive family, let your adopted child know that their birth mother wanted them, but she valued a better life for her child more. 

  1. The Adoption Journey for a Birth Mother is Difficult

Although adoption agencies prepare birth mothers for their adoptive journey by helping them create an adoption plan, and although birth mothers may be confident in their decisions to choose adoption, it is not easy by any means. A birth mother will feel many emotions before, during, and after birth. She might face difficulties on the day of the adoption, but know that this does not mean that she is not confident in the life the adoptive family will provide for her child. It will take time for her to heal even after the placement has occurred.

  1. Support Her Choice. Do Not Judge Her Choice

A birth mother will have already faced a judgment for being pregnant with a child she is unable to care for at this time. She does not need more criticism from the people she is entrusting her child to. A birth mother chooses you to raise her child. Be grateful to her for giving you the gift of loving and raising a child. Going through the adoption process is challenging, and birth mothers will need your support.

  1. A Birth Mother Still Loves Her Child

A birth mother carries her child for nine months. She will develop a deep love for this child. She took the time to plan a bright future for her baby, so she will likely think of her child and how they are getting along in the future, she planned for him or her. She will most likely think of her child every day.

  1. She Trusts You, the Adoptive Family

As a birth mother, she spent so much time searching for the perfect family to raise her child. She probably spent hours looking through potential family profiles at her adoption agency. She was worried that she may never find anyone good enough for her child. But then she found you. She saw that you had all of the qualities and values that she wanted her child to grow up with. She saw you and knew that you would make sure that her child is loved. Do not worry that because you are not biologically related to your child, that you are any less of a parent. Because a birth mother chose you. She chose you because she could see that you were meant to be amazing parents to her child. She trusts you to raise her child with love.

What do Birth Mothers want Missouri Adoptive Families to Know?

Birth mothers want adoptive families to know that she still loves her child and that placing him or her up for adoption comes from a place of love. Her child was not unwanted. She just loved her child so much that she put their needs before her own. She chose you to give her child the best life imaginable. Birth mothers are so grateful to adoptive families, and adoptive families should be grateful to birth mothers, too.

Want to learn more about adoption as a birth mother or adoptive family? Adoption Choices of Missouri has you covered.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri, call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Meet the Author: Heather Frederick is in her fourth and final year at Siena College and lives in Delmar, New York. She is completing her BFA in English and has written several plays, The Vagabond, Paneless, and Yours, for the Oppressed. On most days, you can find her in the kitchen baking and singing to show tunes. 

As a member of the BTS Army, she likes to spend time listening to Kpop and learning dance choreography.

Resources Adoption Agencies in Missouri Can Offer Birth Mothers
Birth Mother

The 6 Top Resources Adoption Agencies in Missouri Can Offer Birth Mothers

May 7, 2021

The 6 Top Resources Adoption Agencies in Missouri Can Offer Birth Mothers

Whether you are a pregnant woman who is considering adoption or a new birth mother and going through one of the many life challenges, we at Adoption Choices of Missouri are here to guide you through your adoption journey and help ease you through these tough moments. Our agency has listed the six adoption resources available for you as a birth mother. If you ever need assistance, know that you will have our utmost care and support.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

Finding Yourself Unexpectedly Unemployed

As a birth mother who might find herself unexpectedly unemployed during her pre-placement or post-placement in her adoption journey. Know that our agency can offer you housing assistance in paying rent, which will be a stepping stone to help you and your baby get the essentials you need as you go along on your adoption journey. Now, you might find small jobs that can help get you started on your journey to provide for yourself. Getting back on your feet probably won’t be easy, but know that we will check in every step of the way to help guide you to the right resources that will help you get stable financially during your post-placement. As a birth mother, you deserve the right to be happy and take care of yourself.

Help For Birth Mothers Who Find Themselves Homeless

As a birth mother, if you ever find yourself homeless, we will provide you with all the essentials you need, like shelter, food, groceries, maternity clothing, and other essentials, to help you with your pregnancy post-placement. To be able to thrive during your adoption process. Having a warm, safe place while you go through your adoption process is important to have a healthy environment for your child to visit and call a second home.

Mental Health is Nothing To Be Ashamed Of

If you are a birth mother going through any mental health struggles, know that this is perfectly okay. Dealing with mental health is not something to be ashamed of, like the emotional struggles that might come along on your adoption journey, don’t worry; you are not alone. Our agency, Adoption Choices of Missouri, has counseling and support group resources available to you.
Having the courage to seek professional help might help you understand your emotions, not just with your adoption but with emotions surrounding other circumstances in your life. Now your adoption counselor will be there to support you every step of the way and make sure you feel safe in our nonjudgmental space that allows you as a birth mother to have a voice. No matter what mental health disorder you suffer from, know that you, as a birth mother, still matter and are still important.

Struggling to Find Resources Because of Language Barriers or Financial Struggles

As an immigrant birth mother, you might struggle to find resources because of a language barrier or financial struggles, but this does not mean you are alone. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we will take the time to help you find the resources you need during your adoption process, which includes everything you and your baby might need. Our agency might be able to translate important documents, answer questions and concerns, and provide you with the care and support you need to not feel so alone as a non-English speaking birth mother. Just because you may not be fluent in English does not mean you don’t deserve the care you earn as a birth mother.

I Am an LGBTQ+ Birth Mother, Will They Still Accept My Child?

As an LGBTQ+ birth mother, you might be wondering, will the adoptive parents I choose for my child be comfortable with me as a gay or lesbian birth mother? Will they still accept my child as their own? Questions like these are perfectly okay to wonder as you begin your adoption journey as an LGBTQ+ birth mother. However, know that we accept all birth mothers from every walks of life at our agency. We will always keep our doors open, have transparent communication, and show you the kindness, care, and support you might need. No matter what circumstance you have been through, we will work with you to have the positive adoption experience you deserve.

Teenage Pregnancy

Being a teenager is hard enough, but having to go through teenage pregnancy is not something anyone is prepared for. As a birth mother, you may feel like you have no support, that you are making this decision all alone. However, that is far from the truth; at our agency, we are here to guide you, provide support and resources to help you through this challenging but rewarding decision, as you are just beginning your life and might not be ready for motherhood. Now, as a young birth mother, you might have lots of questions from your birth child later in your life. However, you might also be able to complete your life goals, like attending college, becoming a mother later in life, or having a successful job. No matter what path you choose after your adoption and years down the road, know that we will not judge you and that you did your best as a mother. As you and your child grow separately, know that your choice of adoption is the right decision for you and your baby, and that age does not matter, you as a birth mother, will forever hold your birth child in your heart.

Advice to Birth Mothers

As a birth mother, there are many circumstances that you may find yourself in, but you don’t ever have to feel like you are alone or like no one will support you. Adoption Choices of Missouri will support you and find the resources that you need. Being a birth mother might not be an easy route to take, but the things you gain as a mother are the most important thing. You gain the support, advice, care, communication, and love to know that wherever you came from, you are an important piece in your child’s life. Your decision to choose adoption despite your circumstances was the best decision for you and your birth child.

 

Meet the Author: Samara Wiley is a published author of poetry, essays, and an environmental children’s storybook called, Waiting for the Water Fairy. She graduated from Benedictine University in 2018 with a double Bachelor of Arts in English Literature and French. She has been published in three small poetry anthologies one was called Talented.

Her other writing accomplishments include: winning a high school poetry competition and $2500 for her high school, having two out of her five novels be considered for publication, and writing movie critic reviews for her university’s newsletter.

Although she has Cerebral Palsy and has had a turbulent childhood, Samara puts these small specs of herself into her writing to personally connect with her audience. She prides herself on pushing the boundaries in her writing and in her personal life with everything she does. Samara writes with her heart and a voice of compassion and loves to pull from her top passions in life.

She currently lives in Yorkville, Illinois with her mom and two sisters.

Self-Care Tips for Birth Mothers
Birth Mother

The Top 4 Self-Care Tips for Birth Mothers Considering Adoption During the Month of May

May 5, 2021

The Top 4 Self-Care Tips for Birth Mothers Considering Adoption During the Month of May

In May, there can be a lot of hype and pressure around Mother’s Day to make everything perfect. More often than not, it ends up being a very emotional and stressful day for many families. But it can be especially devastating to a birth mother who has recently placed her baby for adoption or to a birth mother whose due date is still looming.

But the good news is that you actually have your very own special day dedicated just for you! While you won’t see it advertised as heavily and you won’t see as many cards for it as Mother’s Day, the day before Mother’s Day is actually Birth Mother’s Day. If you have chosen an open adoption, then you will be glad to hear that most adoptive families make it a point for the child to spend time with their birth mother on Birth Mother’s Day.

At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we understand that this may still be a very difficult time for you as a birth mother. Despite your adoptive family’s best efforts to include you, you will probably still find yourself reflecting on your loss of parenthood. That is why we have put together this guide to self-care tips for Missouri birth mothers navigating adoption during the month of May. Treat yourself to some of the well-deserved R&R and TLC you earned.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond, please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 1-816-527-9800

The Top 4 Self-Care Tips for Missouri Birth Mothers to Relax from Mother’s Day Stress During the Month of May

  1. Take care of your body as a birth mother. You’ve heard it before, and I’m here to say it again: Hydrate! Eat healthily! Did you know that natural foods like bananas can improve your mental health by boosting serotonin? Treat yourself to a mani-pedi while you can’t quite reach those toes! But self-care isn’t just all fun spa days (although you should definitely be pampering yourself while you’re at it.) Sometimes self-care means doing the things you don’t want to do for the sake of your health and the health of your baby, like adding some extra light exercising to your routine. Not only will adding in small things like going for an extra walk help you to lose some of that unwanted pregnancy weight, but studies show that exercise also has many positive mental health benefits.
  2. Get outside and enjoy that beautiful May weather! Now is your chance to enjoy some nature before summer comes along and brings its sweltering heat. The sunshine provides plenty of Vitamin D, which works wonders for both your physical and mental health and being in nature surrounded by green spaces is directly related to positive mental health. Studies show that people who spend at least two hours a week in nature tend to be happier and report higher levels of health and well-being than people who did not spend as much time in the great outdoors.
  3. Reach out to your birth mother support networks. With vaccines rolling out, the weather warming up, and COVID-19 rates lowering while restrictions begin laxing, now is a great time to turn to your own family for some support and quality time. But if you don’t get along with your family or feel that you can’t turn to them, there are plenty of other types of support networks out there for birth mothers. You can find help and support in the form of blogs, message boards, discussion groups, or online forums. Attending a birth mother support group — in person or virtually — is also highly recommended. Shared experiences with other birth mothers can really help you feel like you are not alone on your adoption journey while giving you a greater sense of community.
  4. Make sure that you take care of your mental health as a birth mother. While most of the tips listed here do include a way to give your mood an upwards boost, it’s still important to talk to a licensed professional about any mental or emotional grief or anguish you may be experiencing. Our adoption agency is a full-service, licensed adoption agency. This means that mental health counseling and emotional support for birth mothers is just one of the many services we offer to help you navigate the adoption process and post-placement.

You Do Not Have to Deal with Your Unplanned Pregnancy Alone: Call Our Missouri Adoption Agency Today for Help Placing Your Baby for Adoption

April showers bring May flowers, but you weren’t quite expecting this pilgrim. That is exactly why Adoption Choices of Missouri is here to help you navigate your unplanned pregnancy. Our full-service, licensed adoption agency is here to help you throughout the entire adoption process. Our birth mothers are so important to us that we even offer post-placement services to help you readjust after the adoption process is completed. Please contact our adoption agency today so that we can get started helping you with your unplanned pregnancy and making your adoption plan as soon as possible.

Meet the Author: Kelly Felix is a graduate from the University of New Orleans. She holds a BA in English as well as a BA in Sociology. Her English concentration is in journalism, and her specialties in sociology are gender studies and environmental sociology.

When she isn’t voraciously guzzling coffee or devouring books, Kelly can be found either bent over a canvas working on her art or at her computer playing video games. She has hands-on classroom teaching experience from her time working as a substitute teacher for Kelly Services. Kelly also completed an in-house editorial internship at Pelican Publishing Company, and she finished the goal internship program at Green Light New Orleans. Kelly generally exists in a state of suspended disbelief, but when she’s not there she resides in New Orleans.

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