Adoptive Parent Profile Books: 7 Things to Look for as a Birth Mother in Missouri
As a birth mother, deciding to place your baby for adoption is a hard but rewarding decision to make. It shows how deeply you love your child and how you’re keeping their best interests in mind. Now that you’ve chosen to work with our adoption agency, been assigned an adoption caseworker and have begun creating your adoption plan, it’s time to do the next step. Arguably, this is one of the most important steps in your adoption journey — picking your child’s adoptive parents. As a birth mother,your personal values and what lifestyle you want for your child are big decisions, so as you go through the choice of adoption, remember, your personal preferences matter when choosing adoptive parents and will be met with understanding and support.
As a birth mother, there are many qualities that you will want your child to have, so choosing the right adoptive family for your child is a personal choice that narrows down potential matches from ten down to your top three. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we have listed the top 7 important things to look for when searching for your child’s adoptive parents.
- Marital Status of the Adoptive Parents
Some birth mothers look for married couples as they want loving, caring and stable parents to raise their child. As a birth mother, you may want to consider this if you prefer a married or unmarried couple to raise your child. If being married or not is a big deal breaker for you, you may reflect on your personal childhood and the relationship that you had with your parents. In understanding what marriage means for you, as a foundation to raise a child, you will understand what love is and what it means when it comes to your child.
- Size of the Adoptive Family
You may be wondering if you want your child to grow up in a small or large family, with siblings or not, or with a lot of extended family. Perhapsyou want your child to have a pet. The size of your child’s adoptive family is totally up to you. If you want your child to have a more small intimate family that’s okay, and if you want your child to experience the joy of having a big family then that is fine too. Whatever lifestyle you envisioned for your child, he or she will benefit from your personal choice either way.
- Traditions of Adoptive Parents
As a birth mother, you want to know that your child’s adoptive parents will start and keep family traditions with them. Capturing small moments, like your child baking with his or her mother in the kitchen, or maybe helping them decorate the Christmas tree. Sharing these real moments will reassure you as a birth mother that important values and traditions will not just be a passtime for your child’s family. Rather, they will be memories that last a lifetime.
- Everyday Life for the Adoptive Parents
Consider the daily life of your child’s adoptive parents. Ask what activities they plan to do with your child and how they will teach him and her things throughout your child’s life. For example, will your child’s adoptive parents take a mini trip to the zoo on weekends? Will Sundays be deemed family day, where everyone plays board games, eats pizza, and watches movies together? If you want an adoptive family who is active and spends a lot of time together, you can look for potential couples and individuals who might align with this as you look through their adoptive parent profile books.
- Adoptive Parent Hobbies and Interests
As a birth mother, having your child experience new and exciting adventures is one big plus to having your child be placed up for adoption. Seeing what kinds of hobbies that your child’s potential adoptive parents can help shape and influence your child towards a better future. For instance, if music was an important aspect of your life, you may look for adoptive parents who are musical or creative that way. Expressing your own interests may help you narrow your options as you search through adoptive parent profile books.
- Family Values and Parenting Philosophies
Your values are important as they are the foundation of the teachings you want your child to learn. As a birth mother, you may want your child to have important values taught, and an open parent style from your chosen adoptive parents that will allow your child to freely express his or herself. Open conversations and having the ability to be honest with each other will help shape your child into a well-rounded person.
- A Personal Message for the Birth Mother
Receiving a personal message from your child’s adoptive parents is an extra step that they can take to let you know you are a big part of this process. Reading this personalized message or letter, lets you establish a connection with the adoptive parents and helps you gain insight into the life they can offer your child. It also acts as a stepping stone to the bond you’ll form once you meet them and walk through the adoption journey together.
How to Select the Right Adoptive Parents as a Birth Mother
At our adoption agency, Adoption Choices of Missouri, we have detailed adoptive parent profiles that will highlight the top qualities that you, as a birth mother, will be looking for and wanting for your child. As a birth mother, your adoption caseworker will work with you to narrow down your choices based on your personal preferences.
There is no right or wrong way to choose, just as there is no rush. Choosing who will raise your child is a big decision and will take time. Carefully read through each adoptive parent profile and take note of any connection you feel. This can help guide you as well. Remember that just as you are choosing a family for your child, the adoptive parents are also choosing you as the birth mother. Selecting the right family for your child is such an important step in your adoption journey. It’s worth the time and effort to give your child the loving and caring adoptive parents they deserve.
Meet the Author: Samara Wiley is a published author of poetry, essays, and an environmental children’s storybook called, Waiting for the Water Fairy. She graduated from Benedictine University in 2018 with a double Bachelor of Arts in English Literature and French.She has been published in three small poetry anthologies one was called Talented.
Her other writing accomplishments include: winning a high school poetry competition and $2500 for her high school, having two out of her five novels be considered for publication and writing movie critic reviews for her university’s newsletter.
Although she has Cerebral Palsy and has had a turbulent childhood, Samara puts these small specs of herself into her writing to personally connect with her audience. She prides herself on pushing the boundaries in her writing and in her personal life with everything she does. Samara writes with her heart and a voice of compassion, and loves to pull from her top passions in life.
She currently lives in Yorkville, Illinois with her mom and two sisters.