Birth Mother Blog

What Sets Adoption Choices of Missouri Apart From Other Adoption Agencies?

What Sets Adoption Choices of Missouri Apart From Other Adoption Agencies?

By Hannah Wells

Did you recently find out you’re pregnant but were not trying for a baby? Are you considering adoption? If your answer is yes to both of these questions, you have come to the right place! There are many adoption agencies in Missouri, and Adoption Choices of Missouri is a great place to start. But what sets Adoption Choices of Missouri apart?  We are a responsive and trusting agency to work with and will help you through every step of the way. If you are wondering, “How do I put my baby up for adoption?” we can work with you to form an adoption plan that suits you. Whether you are concerned about finances, a place to stay while pregnant, or want to talk through this process, Adoption Choices of Missouri provides birthmothers with various resources.

Financial Support During an Unexpected Pregnancy

Are you concerned about how you are going to afford living expenses on top of medical checkups? This is where Adoption Choices of Missouri comes to meet you. Our team of counselors can help analyze your situation and determine how much financial assistance they can provide. Monetary aid will depend on your eligibility, living situation, the amount of support you have from loved ones, and what phase of life you are in. Adoption Choices of Missouri can potentially provide financial assistance when it comes to transportation, clothing, groceries, and much more!

In addition to living expenses, medical care is costly and can be difficult to access when finances are tight. However, attending regular checkups is an important part of pregnancy, and we want you to have a safe delivery. We can help you apply for Medicaid so you can obtain prenatal care without added stress while you are pregnant. One of our Adoption Counselors will assist you in determining the amount of funds you will need to feel comfortable.

Counseling When Navigating Adoption

Experiencing an unplanned pregnancy can be emotionally taxing, and it’s important to talk through how you are feeling. If you are wondering how to give a baby up for adoption or need emotional support, our counselors can help you through this process. You tell us what route you want to take, and we will provide a helping hand to make that happen. Our team of Birth Parent Counselors will be there for you every step of the way, even after your baby has been provided with a loving home.

At Adoption Choices of MO, birthmothers are treated with respect and dignity. There is no judgment in our sessions, nor do we push our opinions or beliefs onto you. Instead, we listen and provide comfort during a tough time, supporting whatever decision you choose to make. Your Birth Parent Counselor will help you find the right Adoptive Family. Additionally, they will also help you decide who you want by your side when you are giving birth. We want you to feel secure in choosing the correct path for you!

Deciding the Best Place for Safe Housing During the Adoption Process

If eligible, Adoption Choices of Missouri can help you find housing to fit your needs if you do not have a safe space to stay during your pregnancy. We understand that you may be in a situation where finances may be tight, so we sort through housing options to find one that is safe, affordable, and comfortable for you. Getting enough sleep is crucial during pregnancy, and having a cozy place to rest is important for your body. Providing financial assistance to help pay rent can be arranged depending on multiple factors, and we are more than willing to calculate expenses with you. We want to make sure you feel secure and stress-free during this time.

Further Resources if You Are Pregnant and Considering Adoption

Experiencing adoption in Missouri can be difficult, but we can help make this time easier with the valuable resources provided. Navigating finances, emotional support, and finding a comfortable yet affordable place to sleep can be difficult, and we are here to help. We want you to feel safe and supported through a difficult time.

If you are facing an unexpected pregnancy and want to learn more about the adoption processAdoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond. Please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 816-527-9800

 

Birth Mother Blog

I Gave My Baby Up for Adoption, Now What?

I Gave My Baby Up for Adoption, Now What?

By David Seamonson

Adoption is not easy, and there are many processes that can bring stress to you as the birth mother. During the adoption process, you are involved in every decision so that you and your baby feel like everything that could be done for you has been done. Dealing with the emotional fallout from the adoption is not easy. However, after the initial decision, there are a lot of additional steps that can be taken so that you can return to your normal life.

Private Adoption Services and Focus

At an adoption agency, there are a lot of private adoption services that are offered. Initially, from a 24/7 call line for every birth mother who wants to look into adoption. Then, we offer adoption specialists that will work with you so that you have all the facts when you make decisions about the adoption process. Our adoption specialists can direct you to the best family and provide financial assistance during your pregnancy. There is also a counseling service that comes from working with a private adoption service.

One of the specialties of a private adoption agency like Adoption Choices of Missouri is the focus on open and semi-open adoption. These adoption options have been proven to leave birth mothers more secure after complete adoption. Dealing with the loss of your baby is not going to be easy, and that is why the option to see them as they grow up can be beneficial to birth mothers. In addition, seeing how your actions have impacted your baby can eliminate certain feelings of grief, regret, and sadness from losing a large part of you.

Finding Adoption Counseling

An additional private adoption service that is provided to all birth mothers is access to 24/7 counseling. Emotions hit at very different times, which is why each of our certified counselors is available to listen to your thoughts and offer any help they can. This service is available at any time during the adoption process and after the adoption process when some emotions are more volatile.

Our specialists help identify why your emotions make you feel the way you are and understand you. In addition, they have experience with many other birth mothers who have gone through the adoption process and sought our help.

Post Adoption Support Network

While you might not need to always talk with a counselor through our agency, having a support network is the primary reason counselors are here for you. Not every birth mother has access to friends and family that will drop everything to help them, and going through the adoption process alone is even more difficult.

Having a person that you can turn to about what you feel about adoption or a need to understand why you feel the way you are can do wonders. As well to just having an additional person to talk to, the benefit of knowing that there is someone that can help you in times of trouble leads to more mental stability.

Move on, Life After Adoption

While it may be difficult to think about, moving on is why you came to an adoption agency like Adoption Choices of Missouri. Adoption in Missouri is not easy for all birth mothers. A process makes it easier for everyone involved to feel you are doing all you can in your life. It is also a way to leave parts of your past behind you. You did not know what to do when you learned about your unplanned pregnancy. When you looked for adoption agencies near you, you were looking for a way to move past your unplanned pregnancy, and we offered a way to do that.

Now that you have experienced all of the private adoption services available to you, you can do whatever you need to do to move on. There is no financial setback, and there are ways to help you through emotional stress, so moving forward and figuring out what to do with your life is easier now.

I Placed My Baby Up for Adoption, Now What?

An adoption agency offers its services to you to help you return your life to a way that makes you happy. The services it provides are available to all birth mothers seeking adoption, and you are no different. We offer our adoption specialists, adoption counselors, and a process to help you return your life to the best it can be. The world is open to you, and we want to ensure that your unplanned pregnancy does not hurt your future and that you feel you are in a better place now than you were before.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond. Please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri, call or text us at 816-527-9800

Birth Mother Blog

Life For Birth Parents After Adoption

Life For Birth Parents After Adoption

By David Seamonson

Whether planned or not, you continue to live your life when you have a baby. Life could have had a child in it for you if you did not come to an adoption agency, but your choice has led you down a path where you can figure out what was missing in your life. Of course, life after adoption will be a little different, and it might bring up cases where you want to take back your decision. But, in the end, you are in a place where you can move on and find what you need to before having another child or starting a family.

Understanding the Adoption Process

To understand the adoption process, you should know what steps are involved. Knowing what the adoption process is, what types of adoption there are, what private adoption service is available, and how to finalize an adoption plan are all important.

The first step in the adoption process is discussing the type of adoption that suits you. When you first come to an adoption agency, you should know what kind of adoption they specialize in. For example, Adoption Choices of Missouri specializes in an open and semi-open adoption. It does not mean that they do not do closed adoption. It means that they prefer to help you in one of the easiest ways that they know how, by giving you the chance to still be able to see your baby in the future.

The private adoption options are open adoption, semi-open adoption, and closed adoption. A closed adoption will make it so that you will not be able to see or be involved in your child’s life again, which can harm your mental health. These options are available to you so you can do what feels comfortable for you as you move forward after adoption.

The next step is selecting the family. Again, you will have access to the resources of adoption specialists, and you will have a family that will allow you to have the adoption choice you choose. This will be the finalization of the adoption plan.

Life Continues After Adoption

What happens after your adoption plan is set? You can still access all of the resources given to you during the adoption process. There is also financial help that can be worked into the adoption plan so that you can comfortably care for yourself and your baby. This does not change as the time goes on after the adoption plan is set or if you give birth. In addition, you will have access to many experts with you at each step.

Life after an adoption is difficult shortly after you give birth. You do not have a responsibility for a baby anymore, and that weight is off your shoulders, but there is still a sense of loss. The best way to look at it is to think about what your life would have looked like with that baby and what it looks like now. Can you see yourself successful in five years? Taking care of a baby is stressful, can cause sleepless nights, and can distract from your life. The best way to prepare for the future is to feel comfortable with yourself. To do this, you gave up what could have been and allowed yourself to pursue what can make you happy.

Our Adoption Counselors are Here to Help

The resources that are available to you are all there. This includes access to counselors after the adoption plan is set in stone. Many birth mothers will face thoughts of what could have been if they had kept their child. If you are facing thoughts like this and are feeling regret, sadness, depression, or don’t know how to feel, our experts are here to help you move on and past this hurdle. They are there to listen, not to persuade you to any conclusions. We want you to be happy in your decision, not forced.

Life After The Adoption Process

Life will not always be sunshine and rainbows. That is why adoption agencies like Adoption Choices of Missouri contain many adoption specialists that will help you through difficult times and emotions. We give you access to all of our resources so that when the entire process is completed, you will be able to live the life that allows you to pursue your dreams, create a family, and move on.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond. Please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri, call or text us at 816-527-9800.

Birth Mother Blog

4 Self-Care Tips for Birth Mothers in Missouri Adoption Process

4 Self-Care Tips for Birth Mothers in Missouri Adoption Process

By David Seamonson

The adoption process is like a marathon. Everyone tells you how to prepare for it, but the journey is yours. Considering adoption can be a difficult decision, with many hurdles in your future. To prepare yourself for those challenges, you can follow the same steps that help keep marathon runners focused on race day. When it comes to training for a race or marathon, you are preparing physically for the distance ahead of you, but most of all, you are proving with each step of training that you can get through to the next step. Here are some self-care tips for birth mothers that we at Adoption Choices of Missouri have created to help you keep focused through your pregnancy and prepare yourself for what happens after you finish with a private adoption service.

Tracking your progress during the adoption process

While It may be difficult, based on your situation, to write down your thoughts and feelings, it is a benchmark to determine how far you have come since day one. The first days are difficult, but when you question why you are going through adoption in Missouri, you can look back and see why you made your decision. While a runner has spreadsheets and fancy watches to track calories, distance, and heart rate, you have the journal to help track what is important to you.

A recommended way to complete a journal is to think about a good thing in your day, a bad thing, and what you want to do tomorrow. In other words: a rose, a thorn, and a bud. There will be days that are difficult ahead of you, and there are also days that will be a lot happier. You can also list five things that you are thankful for in your life. This can help you to stay out of your head and think about all of the good things that are around you still.

Self-Care Tips for Birth Mothers

1. Sleep

The best way to help prepare for any physical action or stressful activity is to have a sleep schedule. Having 7-9 hours of sleep can help you to feel ready to take on the world. It increases brain function and the ability to control your emotions, allowing you to formulate a schedule. By having a strong sleep schedule, you can have better sleep, and waking up to take on the next day will not seem like quite as big a chore. Having a strong sleep schedule also increases the quality of sleep you will have. You set yourself up to be ready for whatever life throws at you. Sleep is one of the best ways to prepare yourself for whatever life can throw at you.

2. Walk

While marathon runners start small and then ramp up to longer distances, getting out and experiencing some fresh air can help you focus on yourself. It helps with exercise, gives you an excuse to move around, and gets you outside. Being outside helps if you are feeling trapped by your pregnancy. When you go outside, it can help you to focus your thoughts and calm yourself in difficult situations. Walking also stimulates blood flow, which keeps you alert and ready for anything the world can throw at you.

3. Hydrate

Hydration is key. Everyone has heard that the human body is around 70% water, so keeping yourself hydrated can help keep body functions a very high factor. Water can help enhance all senses and make everything you do sharper and much better focus. A good rule of thumb is to drink about half of your body weight in ounces of water. It can help with digestion, brain function, and sleep. Just don’t drink too much water before you go to sleep.

4. Eat

Taking care of your nutrition during pregnancy is important not only for the baby’s growth but for your own health. A balanced diet will reduce the risks of anemia, as well as other unpleasant pregnancy symptoms such as fatigue and morning sickness.

During the adoption process, remember the simple things

Taking time for yourself is very beneficial. Athletes focus on things like this to go through their daily lives. Staying healthy, physically and mentally, can help you prepare for the future and the challenges you could face going through the adoption process. While many other things happen in Adoptions in Missouri, there are many similarities between what you can do for yourself and what high-tier athletes do. Four ways to help you through this process are getting outside, hydrating during the day, documenting your day, and getting enough sleep. These things can help you incredibly get through the adoption process.

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond. Please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri, call or text us at 816-527-9800

Birth Mother Blog

Support After My Adoption Journey

Support After My Adoption Journey

By Blessing E. Ikhimokpa

You’re looking for support after you’ve placed your birth child up for adoption. But you don’t know where to look. That’s okay. Some birth mothers find themselves lost after they’ve placed their birth child up for adoption. They don’t know what to do next. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, we have counselors who can help you find your footing. All you need to do is ask, and you shall receive. 

What Adoption Support is Available to Me in Missouri?

Birth mothers can choose counseling, financial, and medical support. Whenever the birth mother needs counseling throughout the adoption process or after, it’s available to them. Counseling isn’t just for birth mothers. It’s for the birth fathers as well. Some people tend to forget about the birth father during the adoption process. So that’s why the counseling is catered towards both birth parents. 

If the birth mother or birth parents find themselves struggling with money. Depending on how much is allowed to give. Our agency will help them. Not every birth mother’s situation is the same. So we break down what is needed so we can help cater to them. 

Medical care is expensive, and not everyone can afford it. This is why we help birth mothers with their medical bills during pregnancy and birth. Our agency will cover any hospital bills that pop up. Throughout the pregnancy, the birth mother shouldn’t have anything that will cause them stress. 

Our agency is a private adoption service. Any information that is shared with us will not be posted online. For others to see. We’re here to help birth mothers with everyday tasks. They find themselves unable to do. 

Is Counseling Available After My Adoption Placement?

Counseling is available to birth mothers who:

  • Have just decided they want to place their child up for adoption
  • We are currently going through the adoption process
  • Have finalized the adoption papers and are going through the adoption placement

All in all, counseling is available to any birth mother who needs it. It’s available to the birth fathers as well. So if you’re pregnant and considering adoption, you’re eligible to receive counseling, whether it’s for what to do next. Or what your options are going forward.

Why Do I Feel Lost After My Adoption Placement?

Some birth mothers feel lost after their adoption placement because they look at adoption as “giving the child up.” Adoption isn’t “giving the child up.” It’s giving the birth child a better opportunity at life. 

Most of the time, birth mothers place their birth child up for adoption. It’s because it was an unplanned pregnancy. But they decided to keep the baby and place them up for adoption. 

Another factor is why some birth mothers feel lost. Is that their thinking about what the birth child will think of them? So it brings on some conflicting feelings of guilt and shame. Guilt because they think they’ve “given” the birth child up. While shame is surrounded by what they think the birth child will think of them. 

What Can I Do to Get My Mind Off of My Adoption Placement?

Ways to get your mind off the adoption placement are by:

  • Seeking out counseling/therapy
  • Going to support groups 
  • Traveling with friends or family, or by yourself
  • Yoga or meditating 

All ways that will get your mind off the adoption placement. While putting you at peace and ease at the same time. Suppose you’re looking for ways to get your mind off the adoption process. You can search for “adoption agencies near me” and talk to their agents.

What are the Different Kinds of Emotions Birth Mothers Go Through After the Adoption Placement?

With the adoption process and the adoption placement. Some birth mothers tend to feel:

  • Guilt
  • Sadness
  • Shame
  • Regret 

Without having the birth child in front of them. Some birth mothers tend to make up ideas in their heads. Of what the birth child is thinking of them. By not having the birth child with them, they’re thinking of the birth child:

  • Doesn’t think kindly of them
  • Doesn’t want to meet them
  • If given the opportunity, I won’t want to speak to them

Is Adoption the Last Time I’ll See My Birth Child?

When doing Adoption in Missouri, there are three different kinds of adoptions to choose from. In an open adoption, you want to keep in contact with the birth child. Have a relationship with the adoptive parent (s). So, they can inform you about the birth child. You’d like to be able to send them messages to have a relationship with them if this is something you’d like to do. Then you can choose open adoption. 

In an open adoption, birth mothers can share contact information with the adoptive parent (s). To keep in touch and have tabs on the birth child. But that’s not for everyone. Some birth mothers would rather the adoption agency handle any communication with the birth parent (s). If you don’t want to have a relationship with the adoptive parent (s). Or share contact information with them. Then you can choose semi-open adoption. 

You found yourself wanting the adoption agency to handle everything during the adoption process. When asked if you wanted to choose the adoptive parent (s), you said you’d rather the adoption agency choose for you. For example, having a relationship with the birth child after they’ve been adopted. If this is you, then you can choose a closed adoption.

If you’ve gone through the adoption process and are looking for support. Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond. Please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri, call or text us at 816-527-9800

Birth Mother Blog

Adoption Grief vs. Depression: Understanding the Difference and When to Seek Help

Adoption Grief vs. Depression: Understanding the Difference and When to Seek Help

By Carl Roth

For birth mothers, an adoption plan doesn’t end with your baby being placed. There are still obstacles to overcome, and they largely originate from within. It is common for you to go through an emotional toll when giving a child up for adoption. Navigating grief stages is easier with trusted allies at your side. However, if grief leads to depression, there’s an even greater need for a specialist’s help.

Our Adoption Choices of Missouri team knows how important time post-adoption is for birth mothers. Post-placement care is always accounted for those who are pregnant and considering adoption. There’s a variety of effective options to consider, and your private adoption specialist can help you find which ones work best for you. Grief and depression are no small hurdles to clear, but our resources put birth mothers in a position to proceed confidently. 

Understanding Adoption Grief vs. Depression

Grief Stemming from Adoption and Pregnancy

While everybody’s adoption process varies, certain aspects of the journey are inevitable. Experiencing grief is always anticipated, coming and going at different stages. Nobody can be sure when exactly grief will hit hardest because your mental construction differs from all others. Some birth mothers may feel their strongest emotional reactions at the precise moments of significant decisions and parting ways. For others, it takes time for the weight to set in and take its toll. Grief can come in short, concentrated spells and in longer, subtler presences.

Simple reminders of your difficult choices can often trigger it during pregnancy. Over time, you’ll learn when and how your bouts with grief originate, gradually reducing confusion. 

The human mind isn’t designed to go numb to the feelings of sorrow brought on by loss. However, understanding patterns of grief can help you monitor your current condition. The kind of anguish stemming from giving up your baby is not akin to most mourning. It isn’t quite losing a loved one because they are just beginning their life in a different place.

Nevertheless, feelings of sadness can be present when pondering what could have been. One important trait of grief is that it tends to decrease in frequency and potency as time progresses. It can flare up when faced with reminders of your child but is not a constant presence throughout your waking hours. A birth mother experiencing grief can still enjoy life despite their recurring turmoil.

The goal isn’t to forget but to accept and use your experiences to progress. It won’t be easy, but the support of loved ones and time can contribute to a healthy resolution. If you feel professional care is needed, contact Adoption Choices of Missouri’s counseling team for more information. 

Is it Depression You are Feeling After Your Adoption Journey?

Whereas grief tends to be a recurring burden, depression is signaled by more serious symptoms. Depression’s impact is all-encompassing, with even the most basic parts of your life being affected. It hangs overhead like a cloud, making simple tasks become a challenge.

The occasional enjoyment that can still be found while grieving is not present when depressed. Symptoms like weight loss and insomnia sometimes accompany the feelings of prolonged emptiness and hopelessness. Some birth mothers are more prone to its affliction than others, so keep in mind whether you’ve experienced it before. 

Depression is a serious condition, and waiting it out isn’t always the best course of action. It can be a destructive force in anybody’s life, so seeking professional help is vital. Adoption Choices of Missouri takes birth mother depression seriously, and our team can provide counseling or link you to an outside specialist. Your health and well-being are our priority through adoption, so please share your struggles with us. 

Can support groups help with the adoption healing process?

Whether you’re going through grief or depression, seeking structured forms of mental support is a wise endeavor. Many birth mothers find support groups valuable resources for a healthy recovery post-adoption. Having the support of friends and family is important, but they might not provide the benefit of shared experiences in your case. Support groups exist for this very reason. Judgment is inherently reserved when in the company of those who have gone through a similar ordeal to yours.

All birth mothers are familiar with grief, so expressing your feelings and hearing others is a hugely advantageous exercise. Women connected by adoption agencies near you will have different perspectives on comparable experiences, which can be insightful in your search for solace. 

If you’re unsure or need more information, reach out to our Adoption Choices of Missouri team. We can address any concerns or curiosities you may have and connect you with a nearby support group. Your specialist will help chart a plan that continues your care post-placement.

Support groups may be an option that greatly benefits you, so do consider them. It helps to have an open mind when approaching adoption grief/depression care options. Hear what your specialist has to say and take time to explore the avenues of support available to you. 

Learn more about post-adoption care in Missouri

Placing your baby for adoption is difficult without trying to endure the aftermath alone. Powerful emotional effects stemming from an unplanned pregnancy are not to be ignored, and your adoption specialist is paying attention. They can help identify what is troubling you and find the best way to approach your case.

Planning an adoption in Missouri doesn’t end at childbirth, as post-placement care holds primary importance. You deserve to be happy despite your troubles, and Adoption Choices of Missouri can help you on your way ahead. Starting the next chapter becomes easier with structured support giving you the push to propel you forward. Speak with your adoption specialist to find care options for addressing your grief or depression as soon as possible. 

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond. Please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri, call or text us at 816-527-9800

 

Birth Mother Blog

What if I Don’t Want any Counseling After the Adoption Process?

What if I Don’t Need any Counseling After the Adoption Process?

By Jonathan Tick

A birth mother’s choice for choosing adoption in Missouri should be hers and hers alone. Some women may view the adoption process as a positive experience worth sharing or treasuring. While others may see it as a part of their lives that they’d rather not talk about. Both ways of thinking are valid, and Adoption Choices of Missouri wants you to feel comfortable with your decisions.

So how does the adoption process change if a birth mother just wants to give a child up for adoption? Below are a few ways your adoption process may or may not change if you opt out of additional support and a few things to consider if you are choosing to abstain from some of our adoption agencies’ resources.

What Changes in the Adoption Plan?

For the most part, the adoption plan doesn’t really change. You are in charge from the moment you step into one of our local adoption agencies. So naturally, any support you want from our adoption agencies in Missouri is open to you. How much or how little support you want is also completely up to you as well. However, your adoption specialist may or may not suggest some options for you to take while you work with us. That being said, those are just suggestions.  

As for what gets affected, any kind of support can be altered by this. Therapy, financial support, and other forms of pregnancy care can be provided as much or as little as you want. The adoption plan is something that can only be crafted or adjusted by you.

Can I Still Work with My Local Adoption Agency Regardless?

Of course! Even if you’re opting out of pregnancy care, there are still a lot of ways we can help you.  

Adoption in Missouri is usually a more involved process than most people realize. For instance, if you’re thinking about going through with open adoption or not. Birth mothers who want to keep a connection with their child after birth are becoming more common as of late. And facilitating that future lifelong connection requires a lot of help and assistance from your local adoption agency.  

Our adoption agencies in Missouri have a huge list of available families just waiting to take a baby home. And a resource like that wouldn’t be possible if you weren’t partnering up with Adoption Choices of Missouri. Our screening process lets all kinds of different families and guardian pairs become future parents. So from the rainbow of options available, we hope you’ll be able to find one that you like. If not, we’ll get you more so that you can pinpoint the perfect family for your baby.  

After the birth, any privacy or line of communication will also be something that we handle on our end. These options exist because many birth mothers want different things with their Missouri adoption. Rest assured, your identity will remain a mystery to your baby’s adoptive family if you choose to keep it hidden. And your right to know how your baby is doing will be secured if you want a connection after birth.  

Are There Other Things to Consider?

For all intents and purposes, it’s within the mother’s right to reject all forms of support if she wants to. That being said, there’s one thing that we highly recommend you seek help on regardless: legal help.  

Due to the legal complexities of adoption, getting legal help if you’re pregnant and considering adoption is highly recommended. Knowing your rights as a birth mother in regards to your baby can be very useful. Especially if you ever feel uncomfortable or if something feels off during your adoption process.  

Legal counsel can especially be helpful in the case of an unsupportive birth father. Who may or may not be fighting to secure his rights of parenthood in the face of you adopting out your baby. This kind of situation can create a kind of ‘legal hell’ that some birth mothers just aren’t equipped to deal with. So taking advantage of our legal resources in spite of not wanting support may be useful in the long run. And even if you don’t see a point, at least you know your legal boundaries as a birth mother. So that’s nice to know about.  ]

Choosing Not to Pursue Counseling After the Adoption Process

At the end of the day, your right to be supported either financially or through counseling is entirely up to you. Adoption Choices of Missouri wants you to feel comfortable with the decisions you make. So if that means that you want us to lessen the amount of support provided, we’ll do just that. However, it’s strongly recommended to consider even just a few of the options offered by your adoption specialist. As you never know what kind of situation may arise during your adoption process. And when it comes to the safety of you and your baby, sometimes it’s better to be safe than sorry.  

Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond. Please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 816-527-9800

 

Birth Mother Blog

What is covered in adoption counseling?

What is covered in adoption counseling?

By Blessing E. Ikhimokpa

After going through the adoption process, you’re starting to feel guilt about the process entirely. But don’t know who to talk to about it when it comes to seeking out help. You’ve never done it before. So, now that you’re thinking about it. You don’t know where to start. At  Adoption Choices of Missouri, our counselors will help answer any questions you may have.

What is adoption counseling?

The adoption process is different for everyone, what one birth mother may be experiencing. It may not be the same as another. Adoption counseling is for birth mothers who have already gone through the adoption process. Or are you going through it currently?

It’s there to educate birth mothers who are pregnant and considering adoption. Especially if the pregnancy was unplanned, if the pregnancy was unplanned, the adoption counselor will be there to go over the options the birth mother has available to them.

What do they talk about during the adoption counseling sessions?

At your local adoption agency during the counseling session. The counselor will ask the birth mother:

  • How do they feel about the adoption?
  • Do they feel regretful about their decision?
  • Do they change their mind about the adoption?
  • What emotions are they going through in regard to the adoption process?

What are the benefits of adoption counseling?

For birth mothers who have decided to place their birth child up for adoption. As a result of an unplanned pregnancy. Adoption counseling will help them overcome any unwanted emotions. They may feel towards the adoption process. Some of the benefits of adoption counseling are:

  • If you’re new to the adoption process, the counselor could help guide you
  • Any questions or concerns you have about Adoption in Missouri will be answered
  • The counselor will help explain why you’re not giving a child up for adoption. But instead are placing them up for adoption. 
  • If you’d like to be in the birth child’s life after the adoption. The counselor could show you how.
  • Any feelings of grief and regret could be healed after a couple of sessions.

Who is adoption counseling for?

When it comes to adoption, there is birth mother grief. This means that since the birth child has been placed up for adoption. The birth mother will start to feel guilty. Which, as a result, leads them to have grief or loss. 

Some birth mothers tend to feel grief or loss towards the adoption process. Since they think they’ve given the birth child up. But it’s the opposite. The birth mother is giving the birth child a second chance by placing the birth child up for adoption. Depending on the type of adoption chosen. The birth mother will still be able to form a relationship with the child.

What type of adoption counseling sessions are there in Missouri?

Similar to therapy, adoption counseling has many different types. Those being:

  • One-on-one sessions
  • Support groups
  • Birth mother retreats

If the birth mother chooses a one-on-one session. They’re given the privacy of just themselves and the counselor. Any questions the birth mother may have? The counselor will answer it. During the session, the counselor will review the options available to the birth mother. They can choose; to keep the baby, place the child up for adoption, or terminate the pregnancy. 

With support groups, the birth mother will be in a counseling session with multiple other birth mothers in the same boat. Their experiences won’t be the same. But similar in a way, the birth mother could relate. In this session, the counselor will go around the circle and ask the birth mothers to relay their experiences. Either with the adoption process or the pregnancy as a whole. 

Now, birth mother retreats are a type of vacation just for birth mothers. It’s where birth mothers relax and spend time with other birth mothers. They’ll be able to bond and grow from their experiences. While overcoming any difficulties at the same time. 

Why should birth mothers seek counseling after placing a child up for adoption?

Birth mothers should seek counseling because bottling up emotions isn’t healthy if the birth mother has any questions or concerns regarding the pregnancy and the adoption process. Instead, they should tell someone before it’s too late. 

When it comes to adoption, once the birth child has been adopted, the parental rights are taken from the birth parents and given to the adoptive parent (s). So, if the birth mother knows they’ll regret placing their birth child up for adoption. Or they know they’ll feel guilty. The birth mother should find an adoption counselor and relay the message. 

Counseling may feel like a hurdle, but it’s helpful to overcome it at the end of the day. Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond. Please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri, call or text us at 816-527-9800

Birth Mother Blog

Why Does Missouri Adoption Still Carry So Much Stigma?

Why Does Missouri Adoption Still Carry So Much Stigma?

By Jonathan Tick

There can be some negative feelings for birth mothers when they think about pursuing adoption in Missouri. While adoption has become more common, the stigmas surrounding adoption have also stuck around. As a result, some birth mothers think giving a baby up for adoption might not be their best option.  

Adoption Choices of Missouri wants to reassure birth mothers that adoption is better than what those stigmas say. You may feel unsure about the decision to pursue adoption, and that’s ok. However, we want you to choose what’s best for your unplanned pregnancy. Below are a few stigmas and stereotypes about adoption and how they compare to how adoption works.

1) Birth Mothers Are Too Lazy to Take Care of a Child

While it’s true that birth mothers have reasons to seek adoption at a local adoption agency, laziness usually isn’t why. Birth mothers who seek our adoption agencies in Missouri can have many different reasons why they’re seeking adoption. Maybe they believe that they’re not mentally fit to raise a child. Or maybe their home situation they think isn’t suitable to raise a child. These reasons usually keep the child in mind. And the mothers don’t see their baby as something disposable or something they can pawn off at an adoption center.  

2) Adoption is as Simple as Dropping Off the Baby

The adoption process is much longer and more involved than people think. At Adoption Choices of Missouri, the birth mother is there controlling every step of the process via their adoption plan. This process usually spans the entirety of their pregnancy up to the baby’s birth. This is because we believe that the birth mother should control their and their baby’s future so that she can feel confident in her choices and decide for herself what’s ultimately who or what is best for their child.

3) Birth Mothers Never See Their Children Again

It’s true that birth mothers in the past never saw their children again once they were adopted. But these days, the opposite is happening more and more. These new forms of adoption are referred to as ‘open adoptions. ’Where the birth mother stays in touch with their baby and adoptive family once the baby is born.    

When choosing adoption in Missouri, birth mothers are given the option to keep in contact with their baby. If they do so, regular contact is done at the birth mother and adopted family’s discretion. This way, children no longer have to wonder where they come from. And they can potentially embrace their identity as an adopted child knowing that their mother was thinking of their future. Instead of wondering forever about the reason why their birth parents didn’t want them.  

4) Adoption Creates ‘Irregular’ Families

As time marches, the idea of ‘regular’ families has become increasingly muddied. LGBTQ+ families, families with divorced parents, and other combinations of guardians have become more common than nuclear families. As such, the argument that adoption creates irregular families becomes something harder to argue for.  

Not only that, but adopted children are more likely to feel even more loved by their adopted family. Especially since our parent screening process usually selects families willing to care for their newly adopted children.  

5) Adopted Children Will Hate that They Were Adopted Out

This stigma usually comes from classmates teasing the adopted child about the fact that they were adopted. Or because of other things like not knowing who their parents are due to never talking to their birth parents. These factors can contribute to a negative outlook from the child. And can dampen their mood and feelings about their situation as an adopted child.  

While this negativity hasn’t completely gone away, adoption has slowly been seen in a much better light. And many outlets on social media look at the practice positively instead of as something to be ashamed of. Which are some positive ways an adopted child can see their situation as something to be proud of and cherish.

6) Only Certain People Can Adopt Children

Adoption agencies may have strict screening processes, but the criteria they’re looking at are looser than you may think. Adoption Choices of Missouri screens every potential family to ensure they can take care of the child. Either by ensuring they have a good enough environment to raise the child or by knowing their willingness to care for them.  

While it may seem strict at first, in reality, many different kinds of people can become adoptive parents. We have files of single parents, LGBTQ+ parents, and a whole list of other combinations as potential adoptive families. Our goal is to ensure that every child makes it to a good home ready to take care of them, as that’s how the birth mothers and we ultimately decide that you get the opportunity to care for their child.  

So if you’re looking to adopt, Adoption Choices of Missouri serves birth parents statewide and beyond. Please call us or text us to learn more! Call us toll-free at 877-903-4488 or, in Missouri call or text us at 816-527-9800